“I don’t want to be alone…with you.”
I froze as her words hit me like a knife to the gut. My hand lowered out of reflex. “Eve.”
Silent tears fell as she turned her head away. “I’m scared…” She paused as if to say more and just shook her head. “I won’t be able to say no…to stop…not again.”
I didn’t understand.
Nina’s laughter came without warning.I told you so.
I shook her off even as her words and Eve’s seeped through me like poison. I hardly even noticed as Andrea swept around them to the closet and grabbed the spare air mattress and blankets. “I’m sorry to say you won’t be able to leave,” she said. “They won’t allow it and I won’t be able to stop them. It’s getting late and we can discuss things in the morning. For now, get some sleep.”
Time slowed as Lena spoke to Eve, eying Lez by the door and then me. Eve nodded and, without looking my way, she followed Andrea to the spare room, Lena behind her.
Nina’s laughter turned into a ringing in my ears.
Take her, Em. She’s yours, right? She doesn’t know what she’s saying. She’s all messed in the head. Like you. Give her some of your medicine, that’ll fix her.
I tried to shake her off again, the urge to break something almost too tempting. Instead, I took deep breaths, closing my eyes.
Kittens, sunlight, a mother’s warm embrace, Eve’s hair caught in the wind, Eve’s smile.
I opened my eyes and moved, approaching the spare room where the pair stood as Andrea set up the bed.
“There’s a bathroom right down the hall,” she said as she laid down the blankets.
I watched for a moment as she moved around to adjust the bed, then I steered down the hall. I kicked open the door toCassidy’s room and grabbed two pillows. I brought them back to the spare room and set them on the bed.
Lena grimaced at me while Eve looked…about the same. But I’d do everything I could to make her feel safe even if her avoidance hurt like hell, hurt more than the bullets that had ripped through my skin.
Something had changed since we’d been separated. It was as if she didn’t see me, didn’t believe who I was, couldn’t comprehend I was alive, or all the above. I needed to talk to her, set things straight.
First, lose the mask, idiot.
There was something comforting about wearing one. About hiding my face. I thought she’d understand too, that she was no longer scared of it, but it was like she was haunted by it. For every fucked-up thing I did, how I scared the shit out of her, it didn’t take much for me now to see why.
I left the room and stood in the passage, closed my eyes again, breathing in and out for a few seconds. I lifted my hand up to the mask and slipped it off. Gripping it, I turned back to the room.
As I stood in the shadow of the doorway, Andrea turned to leave. She gave me a look that readdon’t do anything stupidas she skirted around me.
I directed my eyes away, across the room to Eve, and caught her gaze. She kept her back to the opposite wall, one hand in a fist at her side, her other in the sling which I had yet to ask about. She bowed her head, a lock of hair falling in her face. Not her real hair as I could see the line of the wig, but I wanted to brush the strand away regardless.
I took a step toward her and heard her friend curse softly. I glanced over and saw her gaping at my face, giving me a look that made me want to put the mask back on.
“I always wondered…” she started to say. Then shook her head. I could see the tension in her body from me being so close. Like she wished she could get as far from me as possible but couldn’t.
I glared at her until she couldn’t look me in the eye and forced her gaze down to her hands instead. I turned to Eve who was still watching me, frozen like a doe, like she was considering bolting away from me but she was also waiting to see what I did first.
I knew the longer I stood there, the more uncomfortable she’d likely get, so, as calmly as possible, I said, “I want to talk to Eve.”
Neither of them said a word at first. Then Lena shifted at the corner of my eye. “I’m not leaving,” she said quietly.
I knew I could pick her up with ease and put her in a seat outside the room if I really wanted to. I think she knew it too. But if I did that, I’d damage the trust between us even more. Eve felt safe with her friend. Not with me.
I’d been prepared to have Eve in my room, holding her the rest of the night. Not for this, though.
“Eve,” I said softly. “Will you talk to me?”
Yeah, just like old times, right? Just the two of us, facing each other, one analyzing the other, trying to figure out what the fuck was wrong with them.