Page 77 of Forget Me Twice

I’ve never fucked anyone raw before. Never had the pleasure of witnessing my release gush from the hole I’d just freshly filled.

Christ. This better not awaken anything in me.

Too late.

I guesswhen I was sorting out my day this morning, I must have conveniently forgotten to pencilGet Your Brains Fucked Out By A Rox Boyonto the planner.

Fuck.Who am I kidding?

Nothing about this day has followed any sort of cohesive agenda.

When I woke up this morning, I thought I’d beenjustabout ready to take a kitchen knife and start peeling my skin off. I hadn’t gotten highorlaid all week and my emergency stash of gin was doing nothing to cut through the mess in my brain.

Everything felt tight and hot and itchy. The irritation ran everywhere; from the top of my scalp down to the ends of my fingers and toes.

Hence the impromptu trip to Axel’s room, timed so I knew he’d be busy skipping the Kraken’s game to go down to the Pier with his crew of shithead friends.

I was still deciding whether I wanted to turn Axel, or whether I would send him down the same dead-end path as Sloane and her Irish lackeys. I think maybe he’d enjoy life as a Gray Man a littletoomuch—if I’m honest—and I couldn’t have that.

When I’d gotten there, I’d allowed myself exactly ten minutes to ferret around in all the obvious places, managing to come away with two Ziplock bags—one filled with the pre-rolled joints, and another bag similar to the one I’d tried to buy from him last weekend.

This one had been a mixture of diazepam and what I think may be temazepam? It was a shit load of benzos regardless, and it felt like a sweet victoryfuck you.

And after the disaster of my week, any small wins helped take the sting out.

Not only did I spend several days staving off what was almost a full body system detox with nothing but alcohol and paracetamol, but I also didn’t manage to enlist any new recruits.

It puts me a full week behind on the schedule I’d set for myself in order to achieve my numbers, but I had honestly needed to lay low until the heat around Zoe’s death had died off a little. Word had also gotten around that there’d been a gang-related shootout outside the Gatehouse during the Welcome Back party.

Everyone had been just a little too spooked for me to safely approach without drawing too much attention.

So yeah, I can’t lie—I desperately needed these few stolen moments.

The problem is that now there’s an ugly sort of feeling growing inside my chest, the longer I’m around Hermes. Almost as if my heart and lungs were experiencing vertigo.

Like the bizarre feeling of ownership I felt when Dominic reminded me that Sebastian wanted to meet them tomorrow night.

Perhaps what’s really needed is for me to start putting back some distance between us. I do need to remember they’re supposed to be a mission, after all.

I rise up on shaky Bambi legs, and start freeing the skirt that’s been gathered and stuffed into the waistband haphazardly. We both stink like sex and are going to have to do a complete walk of shame back to the dorms at this rate.

Hermes follows me up from the cushions, sliding his shorts back into place against his lithely muscled thighs. I watch as he tucks himself away and I can’t help but lament the loss.

He really does have the perfect boyfriend dick.

And Ireallywanted get him and Dio in a room together…Or Hermes and Apollo.Their gorgeous cocks would be a match made in heaven. Dickmatizing.

But I just know shit’s about to turnrealawkward if I let things likeemotionsstart trying to muscle their way into what’s supposed to be a harmless bit of fun.

I just need to feel him out about tomorrow night first, and then I can make the split.

He stretches his arms above his head and his tank rides up. “I think I need to be hosed off. Up for a little skinny dipping?”

I snort, trying to keep my focus on straightening out my wrinkled pleats, and not on the sneak peek of those bronzed, toned abs. “Tempting…”

Wait.

This could be my chance to catch him off guard while he’s still firmly in that post-jizz haze.

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