Page 13 of Comforting the Grump

“Drugs?” The word seemed to echo around us, and the fiery defiance in Ennio’s eyes dimmed, replaced by something akin to fear. Or was it the dawning of realization? “Jesus, Marnin…”

“No one’s ever pressed charges, but who would believe them? How do you prove sex isn’t consensual when you’ve gone home with someone? But there’s plenty of talk, and I couldn’t stand by and watch you get hurt.”

He turned away, staring out the passenger window into the darkness beyond. I couldn’t read his expression, but the rise and fall of his chest quickened, betraying the turmoil my words had unleashed inside him. I reached out tentatively, resting my hand on his shoulder in a rare gesture of comfort. It felt alien and awkward but necessary. “Are you okay?”

Fuck, I was so bad at this—exactly why I hadn’t wanted to tell him.

“Okay? That depends on how you look at it. If what you’re saying is right, and I do believe you, I could’ve been a lot less okay right now. If I’d gone home with him…” Ennio shivered despite the heat blasting from the vents. “So I guess I’m as okay as I can be under the circumstances.”

His eyes grew misty. Fuck, please don’t let him cry. I hated tears, and I was so bad at comforting someone. Maybe if I asked a question, he’d refocus, and we could avoid the emotional breakdown? “Now that you know, were there any signs?”

He blinked, and then the tears came for real. Fuuuuck. He wasn’t even sobbing—which I hated but maybe could’ve dealt with—but silently crying, big tears dripping down his cheeks. He looked so utterly sad and lost that I didn’t know what to do. “Ennio…”

“There were signs,” he murmured so softly I almost missed it. “Multiple red flags, but I ignored them.”

“Like what?”

“When he kissed me, he… The kiss was hard, aggressive. I chalked it up to passion, but I didn’t like it.” Ennio touched his bottom lip. “He bit my lip. Hard enough to draw blood. But then he kissed me again, and I forgot about it. But he was…” He wiped away some tears.

“I’m sorry.” Pitiful words, but what else could I say?

“He never asked. He just took. And I went along with it because I wanted it. Not him, specifically, and not that kind of sex, but I wanted to feel seen and appreciated…sexy.” Ennio rubbed his arms as if trying to erase the memory of Declan’s touch.

Every word he spoke stabbed my heart. How did I take this pain from him? What could I say or do to make it better? “I’m sorry.”

It felt so woefully banal, but I couldn’t come up with anything else. But Ennio didn’t seem to even notice, or if he did, he didn’t acknowledge it.

“I keep throwing myself at these guys, hoping one of them will stick around,” he confessed, his laugh brittle. “I’m so desperate to be loved that I ignore all the red flags and allow my boundaries to be violated. It’s pathetic, isn’t it?”

“Ennio, no,” I said sharply, more forcefully than intended. “It’s human. You want to be seen, to be cherished. There’s nothing pathetic about that. I don’t know anything about love and even less about romance, but I do know that.”

“I don’t know…”

“Hey, look at me,” I urged, waiting until he met my gaze. “You’re one of the strongest people I know. Figuring this out doesn’t make you weak. It makes you brave.”

“Brave?” he echoed, incredulous.

“Yes, brave. You’re willing to keep searching for something real despite the risk of getting hurt or rejected. That takes courage I don’t have.”

He blinked. “You think I’m courageous?”

“So much. You’ve always been yourself, a brightly shining star in an environment that wants people to dim their lights. I admire you so much for that.”

He sniffed, then wiped away the last traces of his tears. “I had no idea you saw me like that.”

“Yeah, well, you know what it’s like with me and compliments. You have to drag them out of me. I don’t do soft and fluffy very well.”

He gave a weak smile that barely pulled up the corners of his mouth, but still. Relief filled me at the promising sign. “Really? I had no idea.”

We were back on track, away from all those emotional landmines. Phew.

Then Ennio put his hand on mine, his blue eyes soft. “Thank you for protecting me even when I didn’t know I needed it.”

I gripped the steering wheel tighter, my knuckles white against the leather. “It’s what anyone would’ve done. Besides, Auden would have my head if I let anything happen to his little brother. Even if you are a grown-ass man.”

He sighed as he removed his hand. “I guess I’m more gullible than I’d like to admit.”

Time to get driving again before we sailed straight into another meltdown. Although that wasn’t the right word. Anyone had the right to be upset after finding out they’d almost been sexually assaulted. Didn’t mean I wanted to deal with an emotional Ennio again. “Let’s go home,” I said.

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