Page 39 of Sometimes You Fall

Hearing her talk about the future that’s only a matter of months away just reminds me of all the decisions I need to make and haven’t even begun to think about yet.

“That sounds agreeable.”

“Of course. In the meantime, business will operate as usual. Just let me know if you’re not feeling well or need a break, and we can work around that too.”

Standing from the chair opposite her desk, I reach out to shake her hand. “Thank you for being understanding about this. The last thing I wanted to tell you after you just hired me is that I’ll be leaving again in a few months.” Shrugging, I say, “I guess I won’t be employee of the year any time soon.”

Alaina ignores my outstretched hand as she laughs, rounds her desk, and pulls me in for a hug. “Scottie, you’re having a baby. It’s a beautiful thing and all that matters right now is that you take care of yourself.”

Inhaling deeply, I say, “I’m trying.”

She releases me and nods. “Good. Okay, we have that parent meeting in an hour, and then I have a few observations to complete today, so I’m going to get back at it.”

“See you soon,” I tell her before exiting her office and heading back to my own. When I close the door behind me and pick up my phone from my desk, I notice a text from an unknown number.

Unknown:Hey. It’s Grady. We need to talk.

Jesus, I haven’t even texted him yet, so this is a surprise.

Me:How did you get my number?

Unknown:My sister.

Astrid. Duh. I knew this was coming, but something about his message just makes my anxiety spike for the tenth time this morning.

Me:Okay, I agree we need to talk, but I’m at work right now.

While waiting for his reply, I program his number into my phone, instantly being teleported back in time when I did this the first time. Seems we’ve both secured new cell phone numbers since then.

Grady:Can we talk tonight then? I have a bunch of questions and my head is spinning. I need to know how this is going to work, Scottie.

Me:Tonight is fine. Can you come over to my house though so I don’t have to leave Chase?

I know my son can fend for himself, but since his breaking and entering incident, he does not have any privacy or trust from me.

Grady:Absolutely. Send me your address. I’ll bring dinner.

Me:You don’t need to do that. My address is really easy. I’m renting the house right next to my mom’s. Apparently, you remember where she lives.

Grady:Yeah, I do. What time works best for you?

Me:Six?

Grady:See ya then.

I stare at my phone, rereading our texts and trying to gauge how he’s feeling, but texts are so difficult at conveying tone and emotion. No matter how he feels though, I have to stand my ground. It’s like I told my mom and grandma, I can’t go down the same road twice. By ending up pregnant, I’ve already made the turn, but I’m not racing down the hill toward a delusional happily ever after again. That hill leads to nothing but a twisted up stomach, and the possibility of losing all control.

I set my phone to the side, wake up my computer, and get to work answering emails. I make a list of everything I want to accomplish today and start flipping through files for students I am scheduled to meet with to go over academic and behavior concerns. But before the first bell rings, signaling the start of school, my phone vibrates with a call.

I nearly drop my phone when I see who is calling.

Clenching my teeth, I toss the phone back on my desk and don’t even bother responding because I know damn well that engaging in that conversation will only make my blood pressure spike.

And I don’t have to answer to him anymore. I’m not his wife, and thanks to him, I may never want that title ever again.

***

“How many people do you think live here?”

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