Page 42 of Revved up & Ready

Her teeth drag over her plush pink lower lip, and I want to drag mine across it.Would she like that?She liked it earlier when I kissed her cheek, but that wasn’t the same. I probably should have kissed her on the lips then. It would’ve made the most sense for the story we’re telling. But I don’t want our first kiss to be in front of anyone else.

Her voice is quiet when she asks, “Do you want to read my list?” Her arms are wrapped tightly around her knees, as if she’s building up the nerve to share it with me.

I try to mask my eagerness, answering with nonchalance, “Thought you’d never ask.”

She giggles, tucking her hair behind her ears and handing me the notebook. The silver lettering on the front saysTry It, and the matching sprayed edges of the paper are starting to wearoff. The first page is blank, but the second is filled with a list of things—about half of them crossed off.

Move to California

Leave Jared

Bake a perfect cookie

Call Mom

Get two tattoos

Take a pole class

Go a whole day without apologizing

Start smoking weed again

Learn how to roll a joint

Fall in love one more time

Change my nail shape

Each one is a small insight into her inner world that leaves me more curious than before.How long has it been since she called her mom? Who taught her how to roll a joint? Are there photos or videos from this pole class she took? Can I see them? Can I convince her to bump up the“no apology”day to the top of the list? I even want to know what her old nail shape was.

I don’t ask any of that, though, skipping over the most intriguing one—fall in love one more time—andopting for a safer question. “Why two tattoos?”

“Getting one didn’t seem adventurous enough.” She shakes her head as soon as she says it. “That’s not really it. I just feel like if I’m going to do it, I shoulddoit. Does that make sense?”

“It really does,” I say, relieved that she’s willing to entertain the conversation. “Do you know what you want to get?”

“I have a few ideas, but nothing solid,” she answers.

“What are these ideas?” I ask. “You got pictures?”

“No pictures, just thoughts. I think I should get something baking-related, and Allie always says I’m like a ray of sunshine.It’s my favorite way to think of myself, and that…” She trails off, suddenly shy.

“I’ve heard her say that,” I nudge her shoulder with mine. “I think it’s a perfect description for you.”

“Really?” She looks at me, her face lighting up.

“Yes,really.” I lean down, making sure she has to look me in the eye. “You’re warm, bright, beautiful, and impossible to ignore. Pure sunshine.”

“Well, that’s—I’m not really—You don’t have to—” she stammers, clearly uncomfortable with the compliment.

“Is ‘learn how to take a compliment’on that list somewhere?” I ask, lifting it between us.

“No,” she says, pressing her lips together, trying to hide a smile.

I pass the book back to her. “Add it.”

She opens her mouth in mock offense but shuts it again when I hold her gaze. “Fine,” she rolls her eyes, her cheeks turning pink. “I guess you have a point.”

---