Page 77 of Deceitful Oath

I slowly brush my fingers over my face, feeling every feature to make sure it’s in the right place, and try to open my eyes again. Sitting up makes me feel woozy so I fall back onto the pillows and let my eyes explore the room.

I’m tucked in bed, still wearing half of last night’s clothing. Hazy sunshine streams through the wooden slats of my window blinds, making the room warm and cozy.

The ceiling fan spins lazily above me, sending a cool breeze over my burning face. The spot beside me is empty and my brain struggles to fill in the puzzle pieces.

Did I get Lux back? Where is she? What’s happening?

“Oh, you’re alive,” a disembodied voice calls from somewhere behind me.

I crane my neck to look at her, framed in the doorway. Her hair, wet and glistening in the sun, slides over her shoulders andher eyes blaze with anger. She’s wearing one of my cashmere bathrobes and I want nothing more than for her to take it off and slip into bed with me.

“It seems that I am,” I groan, forcing myself to sit up. I pull the half-buttoned shirt off my body, wrinkling my nose at the stench. “What the hell happened to me?”

“You came home absolutely wasted,” she says matter-of-factly, passing me a tall glass of water. I chug the magical ice-cold liquid like it’ll save my life. “And you told me some rather interesting stories.”

Fuck. What the hell did I tell her?

I stare at the blanket, trying to kickstart my sluggish brain. My memories of last night are more than hazy.

I remember the rage and frustration I felt after we’d wasted all night tracking Vince and failing to find him. I remember my uncles trying to calm me down, telling me we’d get him eventually.

But I didn’t want to find himeventually.I needed to find himnow.

I had been desperate to enact the worst revenge-torture scenario I could on that piece of shit. Then it all comes rushing back—heading back to Lita’s, how easily the first bottle of bourbon went down, the taxi ride home.

“Care to remind me?” I ask, aiming for nonchalance but probably sounding like an asshole. My memories blank after crawling into bed with Lux.I wouldn’t have told her anything stupid, would I have?

“Well, you started off telling me you love me,” she begins, perching on the edge of the bed. “You were really messy about it though, since your brain was obviously struggling.”

Okay. Okay, that was fine. I do love her—it’s no big secret, really.

“I’m sure my delivery was horrible,” I apologize. “But I do love you, Lux. That wasn’t a drunken ramble or anything like that…well, it was, but…” I cringe at the pounding in my head and wave a hand in her direction. “You know what I mean, I hope.”

“Mhm,” she nods, not meeting my eyes. She clearly doesn’t believe me, and I could mentally slap myself for finally telling her in such a shitty way. I don’t know how to handle emotions likelove, I can admit that—to myself, at least.

The only other person I had felt true, real love for was my mother, and when she died, when she left me, it was the most painful, heartbreaking experience. I had promptly decided that I never wanted to feel that again—the warm embrace of love ripped away too soon.

So, I had convinced myself that I wasn’t capable of such silly emotions. I swallow the lump growing in my throat, knowing I need to be strong and explain all of this to Lux.

“Lux, I…”

“And you also told me about your grand plan to ruin my entire life,” she interjects, giving me a strong side-eye. “And then kill me.”

Shit. That was much, much worse.

“Fuck, I can explain…”

“And you will,” she interrupts again, her voice hard and resolute. “Because we’re having a baby together, and we’re married. But first, I need you not to smell like a cheap strip club.”

She promptly gets up and walks out, leaving me cold and dizzy. The room spins around me, all of my past decisions fusing together to create a gruesome tableau.

As memories swirl around in my mind, I screw my eyes shut, willing them to disappear. After a few minutes of meditative breathing, my heart steadies, and the room stops spinning.

I haul myself off the bed, stripping down, and force myself into a hot shower. Soaping up my body, I deliberate on how to explain what the hell I was trying to achieve with my little game.

I’m sorry, Lux. My father’s right-hand man, who was actually two-timing me and working with the rival family, convinced me that you, a waitress with zero connection to the mafia, killed one of the most powerful dons in the city. So, I decided to torture you for fun, but then fell in love with you. Isn’t that so funny when you really think about it?

Well, it sounds stupid when you reduce it to that, but it’s the truth.

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