Page 143 of Nothing Like the Movies

CHAPTER FORTY-TWO

“I’m always gonna love you.”

—La La Land

Liz

Keep going.

It was seven o’clock, the sun was in my eyes, and I just wasn’t feeling the run today.

But I was going to keep going.

Usually, running calmed my thoughts, but all it’d done so far was make memorestressed out as I replayed last night, over and over again, in my head.

It’d been perfect.

Then it wasn’t.

And then the cop showed up.

Hooooow is that the way the night ended?I thought (in mental-screaming form) as I ran past the sculpture garden. One minute we’d been on fire in the dugout, the next we were fighting, and then we were being questioned by the officials for breaking and entering.

Officer Nerada had lectured us about sneaking onto the field, told us that he could charge us if he wanted to (but he didn’t), and then he proceeded to drive Wes and me home like naughty children.

Since Hitch was closer than my place, he dropped Wes off first. And by the time I got out of the cruiser at my apartment, he’d already sent a text.

Wes: Can I come over and talk to you?

I stared at that message for the next twenty minutes, trying to figure out what I wanted my answer to be.

Which had driven Clark crazy because he was 100 percent Team Wes now.Why not talk to him? You’re going to leave him on read? You’re a monster.

Because if I was being honest,yes—I still had huge feelings for Wes. Maybe they’d never left, or maybe he’d successfully wooed them back, but last night, with him, had felt a lot like love.

And that was the problem.

Even though I had those feelings, I still wasn’t sure I necessarily wanted to follow them. There was a very loud voice in my brain that kept telling me it was safer to just move on from Wes forever. It was good to know he’d never cheated and wasn’t a jerk, but that didn’t mean it was good formeto go back to him now.

So when he called—three times—after I ignored his text, I turned off my phone.

Clark disgustedly went to bed at that point.

But I needed to think.

Even though I knew it was an irrational thought, something had occurred to me last night while I sat on the sofa and binge-watchedFriendsuntil around two. I knew Wes was sorry he’d hurt me, and obviously he’d been going through hell at the time and had done what he thought was best, but would he behave differently if something happened again?

If he threw out his shoulder or lost his scholarship and had to quit school, would we deal with it together, or would he walk away from me this time too? It was an unlikely scenario, but my cautious brain couldn’t stop asking the question.

I was still pondering this idea while I finished my run, I was still pondering it while I showered, and I was still pondering it when I let myself into Morgan to upload some footage and check out equipment for the scrimmage that was later that day.

Would history repeat itself?

I really didn’t want to see Wes until I figured out my own thoughts, so the timing of the scrimmage really sucked.

Because there was no way for me to get out of going without looking like a total coward.

When I got to my cubicle, I distracted myself by editing film until Clark showed up.

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