Page 141 of Verses

This was such a fucking bad idea…and I wondered if maybe we could instead pull Pedro aside and try to talk some sense into him.

After I took off my coat and draped it over a chair near the stage, Wolf pulled his guitar off his shoulder. “Hayley, I already let the guys know we had some things we wanted to talk to them about. We’ve just been waiting on you.”

Holy shit. Why bother talking? I was pretty sure just the announcement itself would have given us away.

I snuck a glance at Kyle. He didn’t say a word, keeping his eyes focused on the strings of his guitar, confirming what I suspected. He likely already had a sneaking suspicion about what we were going to talk about.

Pedro nodded, like he respected what we were doing. I tried to appreciate it, because he could have been a bigger asshole about everything, but it was difficult, because I was still irritated with him.

Wolf stepped offstage. “Anybody want a drink? I’m buying.” That seemed like a good idea—a little alcohol to soothe the nerves. Although I’d seen it have the opposite effect, too, I thought one small drink to take the edge off might make our news go down a little more smoothly.

Pedro said, “Hell, yeah. It’s a few hours before work. I’d love a beer. What about you guys?” Adrian and Kyle nodded, joining everyone offstage.

But when we sat at our usual table in front of the stage, Kyle kept his guitar on his lap, and I suspected it was because he wanted something to focus on besides the words Wolf and I were going to say.

When Wolf sat down after everyone else had, he said, “Hayley, if you’re okay with it, I’ll go ahead and do the talking—but feel free to jump in at any time.” I felt grateful, because I still hadn’t come up with any magical words. And here I considered myself a lyricist.

What a fucking joke.

But Kyle and I had a track record of blowing up at each other. It was better this way. When I gave Wolf a slight nod, he just jumped in. “Hayley and I have started seeing each other.”

Simple. Clean.

Too easy.

I looked straight at Kyle to gauge his reaction, but his eyes were focused on his guitar. Ah…but he couldn’t hide how he was clenching his teeth—and that told me all I needed to know.

He wasn’t happy about it—but it wasn’t like he could do anything about it.

Then I looked around the table to get a general consensus as to how they all felt about it. Even though Pedro had expressed disapproval of our secret, he didn’t necessarily have a problem with our relationship. Adrian, however, spoke first, and I shifted my eyes to his. “I got no issue with what you guys do.”

Pedro said, “I don’t either. As long as it doesn’t cause any drama or fuck up anything with the band, I don’t give a shit what you do. But I don’t think I’m the one you should ask.”

Wolf and I knew he meant Kyle, and I felt my rage at Pedro flare again. The guy wasn’t happy just making us confess. He wanted us to look our victim in the eye. Who’d made Pedro the judge and jury of us all?

Kyle also knew that Pedro was talking about him. Even though he was still looking down at his strings, he shook his head. “How long?”

“A while.”

I jumped in to clarify. “Long after you and I broke up.”

That wasn’t good enough for Kyle. “I think that’s really fucked up. For lots of reasons. The main one…that you felt like you had to keep it secret from us. But whatever.” The way he said it made me wonder if Pedro had told him after all.

Wolf asked, “What can we do to make it better?”

“I don’t think you can. I just have to deal. Hayley and I were together for, like, eight years. Or ten years? I don’t even know anymore—but it was time for us to split. We’ve talked about it. We agreed. But that doesn’t mean it’s easy to get through. So I don’t care. You guys do whatever you gotta do. Just…I agree with Pedro. As long as I don’t have to see you guys making out on stage or fighting, I don’t give a shit. I just want our band to be healthy.”

Wolf nodded. “I respect that.”

“Me too.” Could they even hear me?

Wolf said, “Thank you, guys. We’ll continue the way we have been. Hayley and I will be discreet and—”

“Yeah, cool,” Kyle said. “And that also means that I don’t want to talk about it.”

That’s fair.” Wolf was taking everything in stride, but it was really pissing me off, because once again it was Kyle dictating what I could and couldn’t do.

But I tried to calm down, because maybe Wolf had the right idea: keep everyone happy; don’t make any waves. Just allow Kyle to express his emotions. It was obviously hard on him, even though he was trying to be adult about it. Watching him, I knew it was harder than I’d ever expected it to be.

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