Page 135 of Verses

My thoughts naturally drifted to Wolf. As much as I liked the idea of moving in with him, it was far too early in our relationship for that. Maybe that had been the problem with Kyle and me. Maybe it had been too early for us, but circumstances had forced us to be together. As I looked at how all that had ended up, I knew I didn’t want to jeopardize what Wolf and I had by pushing things forward before it was time.

Maybe it would be easier if I just kept one bag of must-have items and crashed on someone’s couch until I could figure out my next move. As I looked at the four big boxes on my bed next to two stuffed totes and two trash bags full of clothes—not to mention the bedding I had yet to pack—I realized that, even though it would all fit in my car, it would be better to store it somewhere else.

For two seconds, I considered leaving it here until I could get it at a later time—but what if Kyle got another roommate right away? Or what if we had another fight and he decided to just throw my shit away? I didn’t have much, but what I’d packed was everything I had.

Without another thought, I picked up my phone, found Wolf near the top of my text messages, and started typing.Hey there. I wanted to let you know I’m moving out of the apartment with Kyle. I can’t take it here anymore.

I stared at the screen, wondering when he would text back. He was probably at work right now and, even though it wasn’t usually busy this early, he might be chatting with someone. Instead of waiting, I found Claire in my phone and texted her too. Might as well start planting the seeds and figuring out if she was a possible roommate. I texted:Hi! I have a weird question for you: do you have any roommates?

Finally, I got a text back from Wolf that nearly made my heart stop beating.Are you wanting to move in?

Holy shit. How should I even respond to that?

As I saw it, it could go one of two ways. If I saidyes, I was setting us up for failure from the beginning. If I saidno, it might hurt his feelings.

There was no good answer. If he hadn’t been at work, I would have called him to make sure he understood my point of view—but instead I finally texted back the only thing I could think to say:Are you asking me to?

A long silence followed—and I got a text back…but not from Wolf. It was from Claire.I live in a studio apartment on my parents’ property. Why?

Well…that wouldn’t work. I thought I’d remembered being at a party at her parents’ place once in high school and, if the “studio apartment” was what I thought it was, it was a tiny building in the backyard that wasn’t any bigger than mybedroom here. Even if she was willing, I couldn’t imagine something like that working out.

So I just messaged her back something I hoped would seem innocent enough.Just curious.

But it was like she’d read my mind.Having probs with yours?

Yep. Don’t you feel lucky?I ended it with a laughing emoji, hoping she’d let it go.

She shot back another:When are you getting your next tat, btw?

Soon, I hope.

That was the end of our conversation and I sat on my bed, waiting for Wolf to reply—but there was nothing. I looked back over the couple of messages we’d exchanged. Not knowing his intent or if I’d made things super awkward already, I decided to make things clear:I just wondered if I could store a few boxes of my things at your house until I find a place to land. But no worries if you don’t have the space.

I didn’t want him to feel obligated either way.

My stomach in knots, I decided to go ahead and shoot Claire another text.Do you happen to know anyone who’s looking for a roommate?

Enough. I was making myself sick thinking about too many things out of my control. I decided to take a shower and then, when I got out, I’d check my messages again with a clear mind.

When I got under the warm water, I started crying. But why? What the hell was wrong with me? Still, there was no fighting it. I let all the tears flow until the water went from steaming hot to lukewarm. Finally, I turned off the shower, toweling off and combing out my hair.

It was cold, but once I got my clothes on, I felt a little better. I hung up the towel on the rack to dry, trying to decide if I’dwant to put it with the rest of the dirty laundry I’d be toting along when I moved.

When I left the bathroom, I was surprised to see Kyle in the kitchen. I was tempted to simply storm past him, but he said, “Hayley, would you mind sitting down and having a cup of coffee with me?”

“This time of night?”

“Yeah. It’ll warm you up.” He wasn’t wrong. “I know it’s not as good as the shit you make at Early Rise…but I think it would do us some good to talk.”

Trying to keep my voice level, I said, “I don’t know what there is to talk about. I feel like you and I are never going to get along—and it just feels like every time we talk, we’re just rehashing the same old stuff. It’s unhealthy.”

“It’ll be a little different this time. Trust me. Just grab some coffee and have a seat.”

Resisting the urge to sigh audibly, I reminded myself that this would be the last time I had to do this with this man. After I poured a cup and added cream and sugar, I sat down diagonally from him at the table. “Okay. Talk.”

Nodding, he looked down at his cup of coffee for a minute. I could tell he was tired, and it made me wonder if he was sleeping okay.

But I wasn’t about to ask. I just wanted this over with.

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