Page 16 of Starry Night Kisses

“Hey, I love this for you guys. As soon as Kendall mentioned you and Steven split, we both instantly thought you and Eric would be a good match. If you hadn’t gone on your trip abroad, we would have set those wheels in motion a lot sooner.” She winks and sits up, extending her arms and lacing her fingers together to stretch them behind her back.

Not gonna lie, it feels a little weird knowing that Eric’s ex-wife had a hand in trying to set us up.

“Do you mind if I ask why you two didn’t work out?” I avoid her gaze as I sheepishly look around the room. I can feel the flush of awkwardness creeping up my neck into my face, but Daphne tilts her head to catch my gaze, offering me a warm, understanding smile.

“We were together for a long time, but most of it was spent with me taking care of my mom when she was sick, and then grieving her death when we lost her,” she explains. Her voice is melancholy, and her blue eyes go a little glassy as if she’s thinking back to those harder times. “Eric was so good to me—so understanding—but I think we realized thatmaybe we pushed ourselves together because my mom really liked him. We honestly didn’t have much in common. He worked a lot, and when he wasn’t working, he wanted to be outdoors. I love to travel, but I would prefer to do it in style, if you know what I mean.” She shrugs before laying back on the chaise. “That makes me sound vain, but there’s no use in pretending to like a lifestyle that I just don’t.”

“It doesn’t make you sound vain. If anything, at least you knew what you wanted and were honest enough to voice it.”

Unlike my jerk of an ex-husband.

Shaking my head to clear all thoughts of Steven from it because the bastard doesn’t deserve any more of my time, I think about last weekend and how Eric left me tied to my kitchen table.

Yes,left me.

Tied. To. The. Table.

I’d had to contort my body in ways I didn’t know it could bend and twist for me to get free from my bindings.

My eyes flick up to Daphne to see her watching me with a vulpine grin, like she knows exactly what I’m thinking of. “He’s a really good guy,” she says. “He’s kind and generous, and you’ll never be left feeling unsatisfied. His tastes are a little particular—but I’m going to guess, judging by the look on your face right now, you’ve already found that out.”

Her lips will split at the corners if her smile gets any wider, eyes sparkling with mischief as she cocksher head to the side. “Sorry, is it weird of me to speak of things like that?”

“Maybe a little…” I tell her honestly with a shrug. I don’t want to think of her and Eric together that way. Even though she’s remarried with a baby, I still can’t help the prick of jealousy that nudges my chest. “Can I ask why you guys never had any kids?”

The question is sour as it leaves my mouth, like the bitter bile you dry heave up when there’s nothing left in your stomach to purge during a bout of food poisoning or the flu.

Surprise takes over her pretty features, her mouth curving downward just a little as her brows notch together. “We tried…early on in our marriage.” She speaks slowly, as if she’s choosing her words carefully. Her gaze drops to her lap, where she starts to pick at her thumbnail—a trait we obviously share when we’re uncomfortable.

“You don’t have to–”

“No, it’s okay,” she cuts me off with a wave of her hand. “We wanted kids, but like I said earlier, my mom got sick, and things were stressful and hectic for a long time. Eventually, we just decided it wasn’t meant to be for us and stopped trying.” She looks back at me, mouth twitching as she asks, “Do you want kids?”

A swell of adrenaline floods my body with a harsh burn. It coats my esophagus, instantly clogging my sinuses and bringing an onslaught of hot tears that I begin to blink back. I open my mouth torespond, the words getting caught in my throat and resulting in a half-choked rasp instead.

Daphne frowns with concern, but says nothing as I attempt to get a grip on my feelings. Should I tell her the truth? Say that, yes, I want kids but can’t have them. Do I tell her the whole story? Or just keep it to myself since I haven’t even had that talk with Eric yet.

These days, as far as dating goes when you’re our age, it seems like those are the types of things you talk about instantly—wanting kids or not. What if I tell Daphne, and then she tells Eric?

“You know, whatever you say is between us, Evie. I promise I won’t say anything to Eric,” Daphne cuts through my inner turmoil.

I release a breathy laugh, turning my eyes to the ceiling as I wipe under them at the tears that continue to gather. “Are you like a freaking psychic or something?”

She laughs and shrugs her shoulders. “When you’ve been in a group of friends like ours for a while, you begin to pick up on things without needing to be told.”

The space between us fills with a heavy silence. It stretches for seconds, then maybe minutes, before I finally speak. “I can’t have kids. Medically, I’m unable to.”

I expect her face to twist in horror, for her hands to fly to her mouth, and a gasp to fall from her lips before she exclaims,“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry!”

But Daphne does none of those things. Instead,she holds my gaze and nods as she clasps her hands together and leans forward to rest her weight on her knees. “And how does that make you feel?” she asks like she’s my personal therapist and I’ve just divulged a deep, dark secret.

I blink. “No…no one’s ever asked me that…before.”

A slight nod of her head has me continuing with the realization that all I’ve ever wanted was for someone to acknowledge that my feelings are valid. “It makes me feel… I don’t know, like there’s something wrong with me. Even though I know there’s not—I know these things happen—but I still can’t help but feel angry and resentful that I was created this way.”

It feels good to let it out. Once upon a time, I wanted to go to therapy but couldn’t afford it. And I’ve never had a group of friends to talk to about it since all the wives of Steven’s friends just kept telling me tokeep trying,like eventually, after multiple attempts and rounds of IVF, it would just magically happen, despite the doctors saying there was too small a chance.

I tell Daphne as much, and her eyes soften as she abandons the teddy bear on the chaise and kneels on the ground before me, pulling me into her arms without so much as a word.

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