Page 88 of Vow of Silence

I expected to feel relief after taking out Caroline’s killers. Some closure or sense of justice. What I didn’t expect was to find myself standing in the center of my room while I stare at the rug underfoot as though it’ll sprout a mouth and tell me what the fuck to do next.

I feel… empty. Their deaths didn’t erase Caroline’s. There wasn’t some great righting of the scales of injustice where she magically returned to life when I exchanged their souls for hers. There’s just… more death.

More holes in the world where people used to be.

By the time Dmitry knocks on my door, my makeup is flawless, my hair perfectly styled into a mirage of messy indifference, long waves tumbling from an over-plumped ponytail. Nothing distracts the mind like vapid time spent in front of a mirror, creating a facade for the world.

“You wanted to see me, Miss Nastasya?” He stands hesitantly in the doorway, his combat boots laced over his drill pants and a black short-sleeve button-down shirt open at the collar to create an air of casual ease.

The muscles that roll and swell as he clasps his hands behind his back tell me otherwise.

“Yes. Thank you.” I rise from my position in the small armchair near the window and set my phone down on the side table. “My father tasked you with investigating the incident with Caroline and me, am I right?”

He licks his lips and states a stiff, “Da.”

“What have you found?”

Gaze trained over my head, Dmitry flexes his jaw before answering. “I was instructed to redirect my focus two days ago.”

My stomach clenches. “By who?”

“I think you know that, Miss.” He continues to gaze at the wall behind me, words softly falling between us.

I swallow down the bolt of betrayal. “What did you discover before you were instructed to abandon it?” I edge toward oursovietnikslowly, fearing the distance between us may cause me to misunderstand his even words.

“I discovered much the same as you did.” His gaze finally drops to me, a firm stare eliciting prickles across my skin as I move. “I believe you took your investigation one step further than I did, though.”

“What are you saying, Dmitry?”

“Didhekill them?” Papa’s favorite soldier asks. “Or did he make you do it?” A twinge of pain flashes in his eye before he flattens his mouth and waits for me to answer.

“Benito didn’t make me do anything I wasn’t ready to do.”

Dmitry sighs, eyes lifting to stare over my head once more.

“Say it.”

“Say what, Miss?”

I stop inches from my father’s most loyal killer; my head tilted a little to look him in his avoidant eye. “Whatever is on your mind.”

He hesitates, breath heaving from his nose and gusting at my hair before he speaks. “You were better off staying out of that side of the business, Miss Nastasya.”

“Why?” I fold my arms, growing increasingly frustrated that he won’t fucking look at me.

“Because it is no place for you.”

“For a woman?” I snap. “Don’t tell me you believe the same bullshit rhetoric as my father.”

His goddamn chin drops, gaze spearing me with angry intensity as he says, “For a compassionate heart. Killing is done by those of us who’ve forgotten how to feel, Miss. You still have good left in your heart—don’t be so quick to trade it away.”

A heart that currently beats faster than it really should. “I’m more than capable of deciding my place.” I turn away, seeking room to breathe. “What I’mreallytired of is people fucking assuming I’m so goddamn fragile. That I need protection.”

His boot steps follow me farther into the room. “You need preserving,” Dmitry stresses.

I turn again to find him a few feet away, hands flexing at his sides as he seemingly tries to take back his impulsive words.

“Oh, don’t stop now,” I coax, voice low. “You have me intrigued. What else do you honestly think about me?”