Page 44 of Perfect

I twisted my body into a position on the seat that allowed me to face him fully, the leather creaking under my bottom. The lights from the house allowed a soft glow into the vehicle. His face was so perfect and I raised my hand to touch it, but he caught my wrist.

Anxiety jetted into me at the thought of rejection but he transferred his grip to my hand and threaded his fingers through my own, his eyes never leaving my face. I felt thoroughly confused, and out of my comfort zone and I opened my mouth to speak but no words left my throat.

“And you can stop it with the seduction attempt. I don’t hit on plastered females,” he said, almost as if he were speaking to himself. “You need to stop Harlow. Whatever the fuck it is, youneedto deal with it,” Connor’s voice slid into the silence. To be honest, I found it difficult to concentrate with our fingers curled together, the skin-to-skin contact felt amazing, and my whole body was singing.

“What do you mean, I don’t understand. What do I need to deal with?” I asked shyly, feeling a little uncertain about which way it was going to go. He’d been so mean to me over the last few days, there was no way of knowing if he really was interested or playing some type of cruel sick game. Like boys did in the playground when they pulled the hair of the girl they fancied and pushed her to the ground.

“Tell me what you want, I’ll doanythingyou want,” I replied, wanting, noneedinghim to tell me how he felt, that familiar ache pumping in my veins. I needed to hear him say that that he wanted me, liked me.

And then suddenly, it felt like I’d been hit by a bucket of ice-cold water.

“You need to lose it. Whatever this thing of yours is; thisfuckinggirlish crush.”

And BOOM, my usually none existent temper, exploded!

What made it worse was that everything about his face was composed and icy.

It felt too hot to breathe in the car and I yanked my hand away, disappointment smashed away with fury.

“Girlish crush!? What am I, ten?” I snapped out, a rush of annoyance shooting up my spine. I almost plastered my back against the door in order to put more space between our two bodies.

Connor wrapped the hand that had held mine around the steering wheel as if he needed something safe to do with it.

I almost choked on the atmosphere, watching him from my retreated position.

He released a frustrated breath and jammed his fingers through his hair, before pushing back into his seat and staring out of the front windscreen again.

Crush!?Crushwas such achildishword, I had more of an obsession than a fucking crush.

Connor took a deep breath and shot me a withering look. “Youknowwhat I mean? I’ve seen the way you look at me, butnothingcan happen. I won’t allow it. You’ve been here two minutes and you’re already fucking trouble,” he bit out.

“I’mtrouble? I haven’t even doneanything, and as for the way I look at you, you obviously don’t know flagrant contempt when you see it. You’ve been nothing but a dick to me since I got here. I’d have to be a sadist to be interested in you,” I babbled with a half-sob.

He shook his head and turned to look at me again, his face now a mask and it forced my temper up into the next gear. How dare he appear so calm and unaffected, as if he didn’t feel that strange pull between us! Yes, I was young and inexperienced, having only kissed a couple of boys but I wasn’tstupid, Iknewwhen someone was attracted to me. The way he’d watched me at the table that night when we’d spoken about all our favourite movies was proof. The way I caught him looking at me,stealingglances. I knewwantwhen I saw it.

“Do you want me to hate you?” My voice left my lips in a low murmur.

“No, I don’t want that but believe me, youneedto hate me. I don’t fuck around with inexperienced teenagers and can youimaginewhat Mike would say? Heknowsme and the nightmare of my past and it isn’t all roses Harlow. It’s majorly fucked up. Soback the fuck offwith the blatant come-ons. It’snevergoing to happen.”

My breath whooshed through my teeth as I clutched my bag, grabbing my jacket from the foot-well. I had to leave before I lost it, the risk of bursting into tears at any second was approaching like a race car.

I dragged air into my lungs, forcing myself to stay strong. “Youback the fuck off and Ineedto hate you? How f-fucked up is that?” l stuttered as I searched to find the handle on the door. “You aren’t even my type farm boy! I like guys that are sweet to me and know how to have fun. Oneswitha sense of humour that can actually laugh. Whatever stick got shoved up your arse can stay there for all care!” God knows where the stick thing came from.

I turned to open the door, but he caught me roughly by the arm.

“Now you’re being childish,” he said quietly, leaning over the gearstick. “That only highlights my point. Take my advice, stick to those safe ‘fun’ boys who like to fumble around, and stay away from me and the fucking Nates of this world. Yousawwhere the party was heading. It only takes a minute for someone to slip something into your drink. Did you really want to end the night on your back in some strange room, being fucked stupid? Not being able to say no?” Connor said angrily, his voice hoarse.

I looked at where his long fingers were curled around my flesh before raising my eyes to his. I could read from his body language that he was battling with himself in some way, but his response was still like a lash against my senses.

The truth of what he said was terrifying but I managed to reply. “I was fine, I was with Tom. You didn’t have to drag me out of there like some type of jealous boyfriend. I know all about the date rape shit, I’m not stupid. I have been to parties before Connor.”

“Not like that, it hadn’t even started. High school parties are for pussies. This is the country, away from civilisation and dog rough. You’re also underage and shouldn’t have been there anyway. Lane went totally off the rails last year and he invited some proper dodgy people. Some of which could have been there again tonight, probably watching you like you’re their next fucking meal. Tom Wade should have known better. I saw the way Nathan was with you, he had every intention of taking you upstairs.”

“I wouldn’t have let him and Tom was there,” I pointed out again.

“Thomas Wade is the biggest pussy in the village. He has the backbone of a ten-year-old. He wouldn’t have been able to protect you if the shit hit it.”

“Andyouwould?” I bit back the question.

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