Page 36 of All I Want for Christmas

“What?” she asked in confusion.

“Why would I want to meet Marvin’s children?”

“Joe,” she said with gentle exasperation. “Because if things continue the way they are, they’ll be your new siblings.” When I didn’t say anything, she continued, “Marvin wants to meet you and your family. I thought it would be nice for everyone to get acquainted on Christmas.”

“We could meet next weekend. Why Christmas?”

“Well … Marvin’s very busy, and Christmas is the only day all of his children will be available.” When I didn’t say anything, she added, “Besides, Marvin would love to talk to you about your future.”

“Why would a man I’ve never met be interested in my future?”

“Because he knows you’re important to me,” she said with mild exasperation. “And he knows how hard it is to raise a family on blue collar wages. If you’re raising three children, it’s even harder.”

“How altruistic of him,” I said with a hint of sarcasm. “And does Marvin have a solution for my situation?”

“He does!” she said brightly. “I’ve told him how clever you are and that you’re college educated. And he says your experience with the state police will be an asset.”

I shook my head. “An asset forwhat?”

“A job, silly. There’s to be an opening at his branch, and he wants to offer it toyou.”

I was surprised by this turn of events. She’d ignored me for nearly two years. Why was she concerned about my profession and my family’s well-beingnow? “I have a job, Mother.”

“Youhada job,” she said stiffly. “You used to be a high-ranking sheriff’s official, and now you dabble in the dirt for your wife’s cute little business. You’re a Simmons, Joseph. Ambition is part of your DNA. You need acareer. Don’t you wantmore?”

“I’m perfectly content,” I snapped. “Ilovemy life, and if you’d spent even half a minute asking me if I was happy, you’d know that. Do I want to work with my wife forever? I don’t know. But I don’t have to decide right now. For now, I can just love my family and be content, something you and Dadneverwere.” I stood and grabbed my coat off the back of my chair. “No, I won’t be coming for Christmas dinner, and I sure as hell don’t want a job at a bank. That sounds like a nightmare.” I leaned forward. “Which only confirms you never knew me at all.”

I turned around and headed for the door, with my mother calling out my name. I didn’t stop, just kept walking until I reached my car.

“Joe!” my mother called out behind me from the sidewalk. It was the pain and desperation in her voice that stopped me.

I turned to look at her, my hand on the door handle, and waited.

She had her coat slung over her shoulder and her purse in her hand, but her eyes were wide with fear. Did she really want to connect with me, and she was terrified she’d blown it? I’d had money my entire life until I’d turned my back on my parents. She probably thought I wanted it again. Had this been her sick and twisted way of making amends?

The tightness in my chest loosened.

“Joe, I’m just going to lay it out and tell you the truth.”

I dropped my hand from the door handle. “I guess there’s a first time for everything.”

“I suppose I deserve that.” She took a step toward me. “It’s important to Marvin that you’re there. He’s big into family and he doesn’t understand why we don’t see each other more.”

“Have you considered continuing your little truth journey and telling him the real reason?”

She cringed. “I’ve admitted that I’ve not been the best mother, but I want totry, Joe. I want a fresh start with you.”

I almost fell for it. Almost. But she hadn’t reached out to me until Marvin was in her life, asking questions. If family was important to her new boyfriend, he likely wouldn’t want to continue seeing a woman who was estranged from her only son.

“You want to try because of Marvin, not because you want a relationship with me or Hope.” I shook my head. “We won’t be coming to dinner, and as far as I’m concerned, this is the last time we’ll be speaking.”

“Joseph!” she shouted in dismay. “You don’t mean that!”

“I totally mean it,” I said, more calmly than I felt. “I don’t want you anywhere near my kids. They don’t need to be exposed to your poisonous manipulation.” I jerked the car door open. “This is goodbye, Mom. I hope you get the life you deserve.”

Then I drove away and never looked back.

CHAPTER TWELVE

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