Page 25 of Obsession

Maggie peeks her head in. “I’ll get him food.”

Hans’ panicked gaze shoots to her. “Margarete. I’m so sorry.”

She steps into the bathroom and walks over to him, kneeling at his feet. “For what?”

“I don’t know what’s wrong with me. You shouldn’t have seen all that.”

Maggie sighs, placing her hand on his muscular thigh. “There’s no need to apologize for being yourself.”

“Yes, but that entire scene. I don’t want you upset and freaked out. If you want, I can stop.”

He means it. If Maggie asks, he’ll stop. But I don’t think he realizes that, for him, sex transcends mindlessly blowing his load. He connects sex to accessing parts of himself others have suppressed. I’m confident he could live his life by sealing those parts away forever. But now the dam has burst, it’ll be harder than before.

Margarete shakes her head. “I don’t want you to. What we did back there was confusing, exhilarating, and terrifying, but it didn’t hurt me. I don’t understand all of it, and I know a large part of me feels so much guilt for doing any of it. But I also think I need to explore it.” She laughs. “I don’t think I’m like you, though.”

“What do you mean?” Hans asks.

“She’s like both of us,” I say. “Maggie isn’t a full bottom, and she isn’t a full top. She’s in between. A bit of both.” Maggie and Hans turn to look at me. I attempt to swallow, but it feels like a boulder is stuck in my throat. “There’s a theory about kink that it’s hereditary. And another concept is that it’s rooted in trauma. Both could be true, but they’re anecdotal. Science has noway of proving why sexual deviations originate. Some deviations are harmful because they take away choice. We should always condemn those. But consensual acts are completely healthy. Consensual sex isn’t a deviation. I mean, some people consider blow jobs filthy. Society didn’t accept anal sex as relatively mainstream until the last twenty years. Wider acceptance leads to a loosening of societal control. Here’s what I know. Using sex to manipulate and control society is a well-established phenomenon, often associated with followers of an Abrahamic faith. It’s easy to get people to deny who they are when you peddle bullshit about how it’s a cross to bear.” I take a breath. “I think this is who you are, but you’ve never been free to discover it. When others experimented, they forced you to repress.” I pat the tub.

Hans rises from his chair and climbs in. “You’re staying with me, right?”

“Yes, baby. If that’s what you want, you got it.” I turn to Maggie. “You think you can run downstairs and ask Azadeh if she can make Hans a plate?”

Maggie tilts her head and stares at me. She studies me so intently that I wonder if she’s attempting to burn a hole in my head so she can see how my brain works.

I frown. “What’s the matter?”

“You’re so gentle with him. I wasn’t expecting that.” She gestures toward the bedroom. “You were so rough in there.”

“I’m a Dominant, Maggie. I know that in your world, they taught you alpha men are brutal, taking what they want with no regard for others. I’m not like that. Sometimes, I don’t even like doing what he asks of me.”

“So, why do you do it?”

“Don’t get it twisted. I fuck rough, dirty, and fast, but my primary goal isn’t to get off. What gets me going is knowing I’m giving my Sub what they need.” I smile as I work the washcloth along Hans’ skin. “You’d be interested to know I’ve used the safe word, not Hans. I have no issues torturing men, but I’m not a sadist. That causes a problem when you’re sexually active with a masochist.”

“What are those?” Margarete asks.

“A sexual masochist is someone who likes to feel pain during sex, and a sexual sadist is someone who likes to inflict it.” I smile and wink. “I think you might have a penchant for sadism.”

Maggie jolts, and her eyes widen. “I don’t like hurting people.”

I burst out laughing. “Of course not. Enjoying something in the bedroom doesn’t mean you want to do it to everyone you meet.” I lift my hands. “Speaking of. I should wash the caked blood off my hands before bathing Hans.” I walk to the sink and scrub my hands before turning back to Maggie. “It’s something you like doing in the bedroom during sex. The knife marks on Hans’ balls, for example. Good job on those, by the way. They were shallow and will heal quickly. No scarring.”

“Thanks, I guess.”

I chuckle. She’s so cute, but I love that she’s a little scary in the bedroom. “How did you feel when you did that, Maggie?”

“It made me happy because I knew it made Hans happy. I don’t know how to explain it. Taking charge was exciting. Well, partly taking charge. More like your second in command. But even that was intense. Most of all, I made Hans feel good.”

I nod. “That’s it. That’s a trait of a Dom. To lead with the well-being of the Submissive at the forefront of your mind. Let me ask you something else. Did you like taking those orders from me?”

"Yes,” Maggie says. “That part was exciting, too. It felt a little dangerous. I didn’t know what you would do next, and not being in control was almost reassuring. I don’t think I’d like you talking to me the way you do to Hans, though. Some of what you said to him was shocking.”

“I like it,” Hans chimes in. “I try to get Xander to go even further, but he won’t.”

“Why don’t you?” Maggie asks. “If that’s what Hans wants, why don’t you give it to him?”

“I don’t think he’s ready. Another part of being a good Dom is gauging where your Sub is mentally. You both probably did more than you should have just now. I was selfish. After I went to The Covenant, I was jittery and needed something. So that was me burning off the residual adrenaline. One day, Hans will be ready to take on much more, but we aren’t there yet.”

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