Page 93 of Siege of Shadows

They got up to leave. A few minutes after they shut the door, Belle came out of the bedroom again with her suitcase packed and ready, holding her cell phone to her ear. I didn’t pay any mind until I heard her say Rhys’s name. My heart skipped.

“Rhys? Why are you talking to Rhys?” I rushed forward before stopping suddenly. “Is... is he okay?” I asked timidly, but Belle put up a finger to silence me.

“You’re sure you can do this for us? Okay. Thank you, Rhys. I appreciate it.”

With a relieved sigh, she clicked the phone off. “I asked Rhys about the possibility of securing us a Sect jet under pretense. Remember, Communications can track our cylithium frequency—we can’t mask it like Saul. But Rhys said he can convince Brendan to issue an order to send us to Spain on a lead. It’s the best he can do.”

That he was willing to help us didn’t make the truth about him any easier to swallow. Especially when I still hadn’t figured out what to do about it. “What did you tell him?”

“Nothing about his mother,” she said, rolling her suitcase to the side of the door. “I only said it was important. He seemed to understand.”

“But—”

“Don’t worry, Maia.” Belle turned to me. “It’s Rhys. We can trust him.”

I stayed quiet as Lake went to pack her things, calling me to follow her when she’d noticed I’d stayed rooted to the spot for too long. Uncle Nathan went back to his hotel room to get ready to leave himself, but it was only in the prospect of his leaving that I realized how much I needed someone to talk to. I followed him to his room.

“What’s wrong?” Uncle Nathan said as he shut the door behind me. I kept my head low, so he couldn’t see my face behind my mess of hair, but he must have seen my shaking. “Maia? Are you... are you crying?”

He must have heard me whimpering too. I lifted my head, revealing the tears dripping off my eyelashes.

“Tell me everything,” he said.

I did. And by the end of it, I could have sworn his blue eyes were reddening too.

“God, Maia.” Calming himself with a sigh, he placed his hands delicately on my shoulders. “I had no idea you were going through this. I’m so sorry.”

I thought the weight of finally telling someone would make me feel better, but I only felt more lost. “I just don’t know what to do. If I tell Belle that Rhys killed Natalya, she will kill him. That’s not even a question. Depending on what his mom says, she might kill her, too. Belle had no one,” I explained. “No, it was worse than that.” I thought back to that day in France when we visited her old foster home. The simple, pragmatic way she asked the children living there, in front of their foster mother, if they’d been beaten. “Natalya was like the only family she’d ever had. Her mentor, her hero. She was like...” I shook my head. Natalya had meant the world to Belle.

And I understood. After my family died, there would be those quiet moments when I would lie awake in my bed, staring up at the ceiling,feelingthat deafening silence of loneliness, that silence I’d felt that night after the funeral, the kind you feel in your bones when you truly have no one.

But then Saul appeared. I left my home, left my uncle, and yet despite the chaos, there were now people in my life, and suddenly it didn’t feel so barren. Running from city to city, completing missions, fighting monsters, escaping death. Always with them by my side.

And I...

“I don’t want to lose anyone.” I hastily wiped the tears dripping down my cheeks as Uncle Nathan looked on. “Not Belle. Not Rhys. Not anyone. I don’t want anything to change.”

“But, Maia.” Uncle Nathan held my hands to stop their shaking. “If this boy really did murder Natalya, even if it was because of impossible circumstances... it’s going to come out eventually. You can’t keep that a secret forever. The longer you hide it from Belle, the worse it’ll be when she finds out.”

“Iknow.” I gritted my teeth as the tears continued to fall. “I know that. But I... I just can’t. I hate myself.”

“There’s something else, isn’t there?” Uncle Nathan tilted his head, staring at me. “You have feelings for him too, right?”

My tears silently dripped onto his hands.

“I’m so sorry.” Uncle Nathan hugged me.

“Just judge me, please.” I shifted my head off his chest to free my voice. “Tell me I’m dumb, weak, stupid, selfish, delusional, a terrible role model, a terrible person, neurotic, overemotional, hysterical, whatever. Everything and anything you can think of.”

“That’s a lot of adjectives.” Uncle Nathan laughed softly. “But no, I won’t. This isn’t something I can judge. It’s not like I’ve ever been in your shoes. And to be honest, I wouldn’t wish your shoes on anyone.”

When I gazed up at him, the sight of his kind smile did give me a little comfort. I relaxed my shoulders with a quiet exhale.

“I don’t envy your burden, Maia. And I’m...” His voice broke. “I’m sorry that I can’t help you. You’re my brother’s kid, and I’m practically useless to you.”

“Never say that,” I told him. “Because it’s really very false.”

“Even still. This is a burden I can’t take from you. But I can tell you this.” Letting me go, he gently placed a hand on my head. “Secrets never stay buried. They always find a way to the light. Don’t let yourself be caught off guard. Soon, Maia. Even if it’s not today. Try to tell them.”

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