“Fine.”
That was the last thing he said before he left. He walked past me and I turned to watch him go. He didn’t even glance back at me or say goodbye. Maybe I was expecting too much of him. He wasn’t being rude to me. He was just… distant. I guess I wasn’t allowed to complain about that. After all, we weren’t a couple.
I spent the first few days of my stay trying to make the most out of living together. But after getting shut down multiple times, I decided to let it go. If Matteo wanted to be distant roommates then that was what we would be. I wasn’t going to force anything more out of this.
I had tried but clearly, this was how he wanted things to be. The last straw for me was when he came home a few evenings later. Agnes had made an incredible dinner of pan-seared salmon pasta primavera, which she told me was his favorite. Matteo’s palate seemed to have changed a lot in the years we’d been apart.
“Welcome home,” I said when he walked into the kitchen. He murmured a curt response but that didn’t deter me. On that day, I was determined to make things work. I knew we wouldn’t be together again but I hoped that we could at least be friends. “I was thinking we could have dinner together in the dining room.”
I waited for him to say something Finally I asked, “Did you hear me?”
He still didn’t answer. He simply poured water into a glass and drank. When he was done, he looked at me like he was seeing me for the first time that evening.
“Matteo?”
“What?” he asked harshly.
His tone made me want to give up but I forged on. “I suggested we eat dinner together in the dining room.”
“Look, Amelia. I’m in no mood for this. I had a stressful day at the office and I’m tired. Good night.”
That was the moment I decided to give up on making this work. I gave up on trying to be friendly with him. I decided that I would avoid him the way he was avoiding me and I wouldn’t attempt to make any kind of conversation. It was only the second week of us living together but I’d already lost hope of us ever becoming friends. Clearly, that was a fruitless mission.
I shifted my focus from Matteo to other things. I was in New York City for crying out loud. I should be exploring the sights and having new experiences not wallowing over a man who wanted nothing to do with me.
The last time I was in New York, I was with my father and even though I contributed nothing to his meetings, he had forced me to attend them all. That meant I had no time to see much of anything.
I started my exploration at Central Park. I vaguely remembered visiting the park years ago but seeing it again made me fall in love. I loved watching the happy family have lunch together. I loved watching kids throw their frisbees. And I loved watching the couples who looked as if they were in their own world.
I guess there was a reason I came here first. Maybe a part of me was still thinking about the park back in California. The placethat had meant so much to Matteo and me. Now that park had two painful memories that I would give anything to forget.
Visiting Central Park made me feel renewed. Here, Matteo and I hadn’t said any hurtful words and we hadn’t broken each other’s hearts. The place was like a fresh start.
Too bad a fresh start was the one thing I couldn’t get.
***
After seeing the city I began my hunt for a job. I needed to be employed by the time I left Matteo’s house. It was the only way I could truly detach myself from my parents’ control. If I continued to depend on them financially, they would always have a way to interfere in my life.
At the moment, nothing was more important than finding a stable job. Not only would it give me the money I needed to be independent, but it would also give me a reason to leave the house. Exploring the city was fun but I was ready to do something meaningful. I wanted to wake up every day and know that I had somewhere to be.
I knew getting a job wouldn’t be easy, especially for someone like me. I had no real job experience, except if organizing my father’s files and listening in on his boring meetings counted as work. I’d spent all my life catering to my parents and that left me with nothing for myself.
Thankfully, what I lacked in experience, I made up for in connections. After returning from a trip to the Empire State Building, I pulled out my journal and flipped to the last page. There I’d scribbled down the numbers of everyone I knew in New York. I was closer to some more than others but I called them all and placed my request just the same.
After making some phone calls, I had a few interviews lined up with various companies. I knew I had to put in the work toprepare because getting the interview didn’t mean I’d gotten the job.
I was about to close my journal when my eyes snagged on a familiar name. Lisa Miller. Lisa and I went to college together. We were close when she lived in California but after her move, we grew apart. I realized this was the perfect opportunity for us to reconnect.
“Hi Lisa,” I said once the line connected. “It’s Amelia.”
Lisa gasped loudly. “Amelia? Amelia Pierson?”
“That’s the one.”
“Oh wow! It’s so great to hear from you! How have you been?”
“I’ve been good,” came my half-hearted response. Maybe because the honest answer to that question was ‘not good at all’. I passed the question back to her. “How have you been?”