Page 13 of Forcing Her Hand

“Well, feel free to send him over to me for lessons,” Clara said, winking. All of them giggled. “I’m sorry to hear that, sweetie, but you’re young. There’s plenty of time.”

“Sounds like he’s kind of a rebound,” said Linda. “How serious were you with the other guy?”

“Not serious,” said Allison, stabbing a piece of her chicken parmesan with unnecessary force.

“Oooh, so it’s like that, is it?” Linda asked sympathetically. All of them looked sympathetic, but Allison was suddenly aware of how much older they all were, probably thinking about young love and how she’d get over Todd and find someone better. Part of her wanted to rebel against that logic, but part of her hoped they were right.

“Well, with the sex thing, do you… you know? Take care of yourself?” Sally asked, then blushed deeply as they looked at her. It was hard to see the blush because of her creamy cocoa skin, compliments of her Filipino heritage, but she was embarrassed enough for the heat to darken her cheeks. The girls burst into wild giggles.

“I mean, um… yes?” Allison laughed, knowing she was blushing, too.

“I’m just asking because I got a new vibrator,” Sally said, lowering her voice to a whisper. “And it’s ah-maaaaazing.”

“What kind?” Clara asked.

“It’s called a dolphin, just like a rabbit but with a dolphin shape.”

They cracked up, knowing Sally’s penchant for dolphins. She had a dolphin snow globe on her desk, all of her pens had dolphins decorating them, and the pendant hanging from her necklace was a pretty silver dolphin.

“Why am I not surprised?” Linda asked through the laughter.

It got Allison thinking, and when she got home, she got onto her computer, searching for sex toys, which inevitably led to story and porn sites. Things were definitely hot online. She found a site filled with girls taking huge cocks up their asses, another where it was all gangbangs and orgies, and another with just bondage and whips and chains. Her pussy was wet and hungry from jealously looking at these girls, all in positions she’d been in before, doing things she kinda wished she was doing now. Finally, she found a site that made life spring back into her dull hazel eyes. Sitting up straight, she looked through it in awe as page after page of kinky sex toys available for her to buy passed by her eyes.

Why hadn’t she ever bought herself some new sex toys? All she had was her same old vibrator and the butt plug Todd had sent her home wearing. She could have bought some for herself. Looking over the site, she decided she wanted to be conservative with her first choices, although it was infinitely better than having to go to an actual store and look over the products. Online, there was no one to see her shame as she picked out a medium-sized rubber butt plug, the same kind of tweezer clamps on a Y shaped chain Todd had put on her, and a vibrator with a little beaver shaped clit stimulator.

That night, Allison decided she wasn’t going to wait around for Todd again. If he had feelings for her, maybe some competition would be good for him. Diana was over at Chad’s, and Roger was invited inside for the first time since Todd left again. It was a decision she almost regretted as he slowly and gently thrust into her wanting pussy and moaned into her curls. Heaving underneath him, she pretended to pant for breath and gasp as he made love to her, all the while wishing she hadn’t invited him in. It wasn’t even as if she could pretend he was Todd. Todd would never leave her wanting like—unless he was teasing her to get her riled, then become harder and rougher as she begged him to fuck her. Wrong. This all just felt so wrong.

“Oh…” Roger sighed in completion as he rolled off her and pulled her close, hands stroking her sides. “I love you, Allison.”

She tried not to tense up when he said it, and fortunately, he didn’t seem to notice as he kissed the back of her neck. Burrowing her face into his chest, she murmured something noncommittal and let him cuddle her, feeling like a monster.

That night, after Roger had fallen asleep, Allison slipped out of his arms and went into the main room of the apartment, curling up in her bathrobe. She was going to have to break up with him. It wasn’t fair. If she’d realized his feelings were getting so intense… She’d been so wrapped up in her own feelings for someone else, she hadn’t really been thinking about Roger. Allison felt awful. Curling up on the couch, for the first time, she cried over Roger.

* * *

Allison avoided Roger for the next few days. She felt horribly guilty, but at the same time, it seemed awful to break up with someone the morning after sleeping with them and them confessing their love. Maybe a little distance would help sort out her feelings… maybe they wouldn’t need to break up.

“All right,” Diana said, practically jumping on Allison when she came home from work. Allison groaned as her roommate stripped her of her purse and jacket, dragging her into the kitchen. Dinner was ready—chicken parmesan, one of Allison’s favorite comfort foods—so there were no distractions. Obligingly, Allison sat down at the kitchen table while Diana filled their plates with chicken, pasta, and green beans, shooting her suspicious looks.

“Okay, spill,” Diana said as she put a plate in front of Allison. The heavenly smell of tomato sauce, oregano, and basil caressed Allison’s nose, making her feel better already. There was a hint of citrus, too, which meant Diana had probably put lemon juice on the green beans. Yum. Allison cut into her chicken as she “spilled.”

“I think I have to break up with Roger, but I don’t know how to do it. I feel awful. I really like him, a lot, but he just isn’t… he isn’t who I see myself with.”

“Is there someone else you see yourself with?” Diana asked astutely, picking up a forkful of green beans.

Allison chewed the chicken, letting the breading, moist meat, and tomato sauce slide down her throat, filling her stomach with contentment. Her taste buds were very happy, too.

“If Todd was here, then maybe yes. But that’s not why I’m breaking up with Roger. I have no idea if Todd’s ever coming back. I just...” Allison broke off her sentence sighed. “I want to want to be with Roger, but the truth is, I don’t. The other night when he said he loved me, I realized I don’t feel that deeply for him. Not even a little bit.”

Diana made a face. “Yikes. What did you say back?”

“Nothing, just kind of mumbled into his chest.” Allison felt immeasurably guilty. Some of that guilt eased when Diana laughed, not a mean laugh, just acknowledging the awkwardness of the situation. “Yeah. Slick, right?”

“Probably should have just said something right then.”

“Well, I was kind of in the middle of having a revelation, and we’d just finished having sex. It didn’t really seem like the right time.”

“Ouch,” Diana said, wincing sympathetically.

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