Page 25 of The Road Sometimes Taken

He scoops his hands around me and picks me up, cradling me against his chest and walking us toward the black chairs next to our tent. I take my hand off his mouth and stare at it instead. I clear my throat and look away right before he sits me in one of the chairs. Manny walks to the other, sitting and resting his head on the top of the chair and laughing again, this time softer.

“Wow!” He lets out a loud breath and closes his eyes. “I haven’t done that in so long.”

“You’re in the habit of running around with a girl on your back through the grass, Manny?”

“Hahaha, no. I haven’t laughed like that in a while,” he shares, opening his eyes and keeping them locked on the sky.Why not?I think. Because with a laugh like that, I would laugh all the time.

I do the same and lay my head back, looking up at the sky and seeing how clearly I can see the stars. These crisp nights, when the sky transforms into this starry canvas of twinkling lights, give me a sense of awe greater than most things. It’s the perfect reminder that we’re a tiny part of this entire galaxy. It makes my problems and issues seem so insignificant in the grand scheme of things. It’s such a good feeling when all I’ve thought about for years is about how much of an inconvenience I was. But how can you be anything but precious when you’re part of this magical world?

“You should do it more often. It suits you,” I add, smiling at no one but the glittering tapestry of shining stars above. The serene silence around us echoes with the burbles of the river in the background and the crickets and other critters serenading us makes this moment perfect as it is.

“Yeah,” he muses softly, letting out a deep breath. “There’s never enough time.”

“There’s never enough time for what?” I ask, my voice breaking as I try to contain my emotions so he doesn’t see how sad it makes me that, at less than thirty years old, Manny has stopped living.

“For stopping to notice the calm. To notice the beauty. To notice it all.”

“But there should be, Manny. We never know when our days will be over, or when our time will pass. We will never know when our last moment will be so why don’t you try to make the best of them? You’ve given your work your all. Don’t you think it’s time for you to give yourself all of you too?”

His gaze is still locked on the sky but a silent tear slips from the corner of his eye, glistening in the dark night.

“I know it’s hard to put yourself first but maybe you justneed a reminder,” I continue, pulling a bracelet from my arm. “Here.”

Manny tilts his head to face me and when his eyes meet mine, I lift my hand to him. I reach out to grab his hand and turn it palm up, placing the pink stretchy bracelet on his palm.

“These always remind me to take a breath and slow down. To count the stars, to smell the flowers, to dance to good music, and to sing my favorite songs. They remind me to leave work on time and to put my phone away after a while. Now you can remember, too.”

His eyes glisten with emotion as he slides the bracelet onto his wrist. As much as I’m glad he accepted the band, I hope he doesn’t ask why I started wearing them. It’s not that I don’t want to share, but I fear this moment is already so heavy and I’m not sure I’m ready to unpack it all.

He stares at his wrist before looking back up at me, “Thank you, Carita.”Carita.The nickname again but this time it feels nothing childish. It feels like a code word to let me know he hears me. To let me know he sees me.

“Twelve,” he shares before laying his head back on the chair and looking up at the sky.

“Twelve what? Stars?” I ask, slightly confused.

“It’s like you were kissed by them,” he adds and now I’m even more confused.

“Manuel, you’re going to have to use more words than that or explain a little better.”

Manny chuckles softly. “Your freckles, Carita. You have the same amount of freckles as stars in the sky.” He looks so at peace as he says that, so calm, like he didn’t just say the nicest thing anyone had ever said to me or like he didn’t just speak pure poetry.

I bring my hand to gently touch the bridge of my nose. Myfreckles are barely noticeable, and for him to have counted them is more than I can handle or acknowledge right now.

I wait for the spell to break, but it doesn’t. Manny just keeps looking up at the sky. He looks so restful that I grab my phone from the small pocket in my dress and snap a picture of him.It’s absolutely perfect.The moonlight illuminates his olive brown features. His dark soft curls and his dark shirt are in contrast with the soft lights behind him and his smile—his beautiful smile—shines as bright as all the lights around him.

“Counting stars, Manny?” I ask, tucking my phone back in the pocket.

He brings his eyes to me this time, smiles, and replies, “Yeah, now there are thirteen that I can see.” His intense stare doesn’t leave my eyes and even though I’m fully clothed, I feel naked under his sight. As if somehow, he can see all of me. Like he can see through me.

“Maybe you should make your own summer bucket list,” I tell him, my voice shaking and my throat dry.

“Maybe I should,” he agrees. He clears his throat and stands up, giving me his hand to help me get up but when he sees my feet again, he shakes his head. “Do you want me to carry you in?”

“Nope, let my toesies get some dirt, please.” He smiles at me and nods and we walk down the path and up the wooden steps.

Manny opens the door for me. The air is cool inside in the dimly lit room and a shiver runs down my spine, making my whole body aware of how chilly it is here. There’s no way I’ll be able to sleep in the pjs I brought so I go through my bag and grab a pair of leggings and a sweatshirt. Even if it’s summer, I always bring a sweatshirt with me for comfort and to keep me warm and toasty, like a marshmallow.

“I’m going to get dressed for bed,” I tell Manny, walking into the bathroom and clicking the door shut behind me.

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