Page 95 of Wild Nights

In other words, her boyfriend was still in New York, and he'd let her travel home for the holidays without him.

Feeling someone's gaze on me, I looked up to find Eli watching me from where he stood next to Oliver and Carolina.

I lowered my gaze to Tori. "What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to see you while I was home." I heard the hurt in her voice, but I couldn't bring myself to apologize. "Things haven't been the same between us."

"What did you expect? You went off to school and never came back." Not like she promised she would.

She blinked. "I texted. I visited. But you're always busy. I miss our friendship."

I rubbed the pain in my chest. "I miss it too."

"You want to get a drink and talk?"

"Sure." I led her over to the side of the deck, away from the curious looks from my brothers, where a fire was roaring in the hearth. "I'll be right back."

My mouth was dry. I asked the bartender for popcorn and two drinks. Then I carried them through the crowd, who had mostly reconvened inside to dance to the live band and drink. My brothers weren't around. I assumed they'd both retreated to their respective rooms for alone time with their women.

Outside, I set the tray on the coffee table in front of the couch. I grabbed a throw blanket and draped it over our laps before handing her the glass.

"You look good," Tori said to me.

"You do too." She'd always looked good. She was beautiful, not that I'd ever tell her that. She was my friend. My best friend. And friends didn't notice how attractive they were, not when they valued their friendship.

Tori was the one person who believed in me, and I wouldn't do anything to mess up that connection. Not for an inconvenient crush. I'd gone this long without acting on it; I wouldn't do anything to mess up our friendship now.

"What have you been up to?" Tori asked.

No one asked about me. Not really. Everyone knew I worked at the resort. Nothing had ever changed in that regard, and it wouldn't. "I work here."

She looked at me like she cared what I had to say, as if working at my family's resort was some kind of accomplishment. They let me work here because it was expected.

"Are you happy?"

That question hit me in the gut. No one ever asked me that. They just assumed I was. "I don't know."

She laughed softly, and the sound wrapped around my heart, conjuring all kinds of childhood memories, like hiding in the lodge from my brothers while playing hide and seek. She always had trouble being quiet. She'd start giggling and wouldn't be able to stop. "You're working on your family's resort. That's what you always wanted to do."

"True." According to my brothers, I didn't have ambition to do anything else. It was just expected that I continue organizing the ski lessons and other outdoor activities. "How about you? You enjoying living in New York?"

Her shoulders dropped. "To be honest, I'm a little tired of the city. It's noisy and big. I feel lost sometimes."

"Things with the boyfriend are good though?" I asked even though I didn't want to know the details.

"You mean Hugh?" At my nod, she added, "We're fine."

Fine wasn't great. But I refused to be interested in what that meant. Even if Tori wasn't happy with Hugh, she wasn't going to break up with him to go out with me. She didn't even know I harbored this crush on her.

"Do you remember that pact we had when we were kids?"

I shook my head even as my mind ran through the details of that day. We'd been seventeen and worried about what we'd do with our lives. To be fair, Tori was more worried about it than I had been. Her dad was a doctor who owned a practice in town. He expected her to return and run it with him. My family didn't expect much from me, so I kind of went along with the flow. But that day, Tori felt the pressure.

We'd skied on the one trail that flattened through the woods. It was one of Tori's favorites because it wasn't a straight slope. We wandered off the path to a tree where I helped Tori carve in our initials. "You said if we're not married by the time we're thirty, we'd marry each other." I hadn't been worried about the vow because thirty had seemed so far away. "It looks like you're off the hook because you'll be marrying your doctor."

"But what about you?" Tori asked, concern etched in the lines on her forehead.

"What about me?" No one expected me to get married. I was the good-time guy.