Page 114 of Bloom: Part 2

“People start over all the time.”

“This isn’t starting over, Bloom. This is changing who you are and becoming someone else. How can you do that when you’re still not the best version of yourself yet? There’s still so much to discover about you. Why give up the chance to find out more about who you are because of a man?”

“He’s not just a man. I love him.”

“You are incapable of loving anyone! You are a sociopath with an obsessive love disorder!”

The words hit like a slap, and I tightened my jaw. Dr. Simms stood there, chest heaving, his fingers twitching as though he wanted to snatch the words out of the air and stuff them back down his throat. But the damage was done. I curled my fists at my sides, knuckles straining white as a heavy silence descended between us.

He stepped closer, his movements abrupt, jerky. “I—Bloom, I’m only trying to help you.”

“Well, maybe I don’t need your help.” My voice was cold, clipped. “Coming here was a mistake.”

“No! Please wait.” His hand shot out as though he might physically stop me, but he caught himself, letting it fall limply to his side. “I didn’t mean it like that. You’ve been through so much. It’s clouding your ability to see what’s best for you. Logan can’t give you what you need. I can. As your psychiatrist, I know what’s best for you. Let me help you.”

“Help me?” A bitter laugh escaped before I could stop it. “By telling me I’m broken? That I don’t even know how to love? That’s the difference between everyone and Logan. He doesn’t treat me like I’m a mental case. He treats me normal.”

“But you are not normal. You’re a complicated young man, and I just want to see what your mind can do—to help you to cope.”

My pulse pounded in my ears, and I forced myself to take a deep breath, even as my stomach twisted tighter.

“Why are you really saying all this?” I asked quietly, my voice barely above a whisper. “Because it doesn’t feel like this is about me anymore.”

He froze midstep, his back still turned to me. “What do you mean?”

“You know exactly what I mean.” I stood, the chair scraping loudly against the floor as I pushed it back. “I may take a while to figure things out, but I see it now. This isn’t about Logan or me starting over. This is about you.”

He spun around, his expression unreadable, his eyes darker than I’d ever seen them. “That’s ridiculous.”

“Is it?” I took a step toward him, fueled by suspicion. “Because you’re acting like this is personal. Like you don’t want me to leave because of how it affects you. Am I wrong?”

Dr. Simms opened his mouth, but no words came. He gripped the back of the chair he’d been sitting in, his knuckles going white. The silence stretched between us, oppressive and heavy.

“Bloom,” he finally said, his voice hoarse, strained. “You don’t understand. I’ve seen too many people make decisions like this, decisions they regret for the rest of their lives. I don’t want that for you.”

“No.” I shook my head, my heart sinking. “That’s bullshit. There’s something else. I can feel it.”

He laughed bitterly, the sound sharp and jagged. “Fine. You want the truth? I care about you, Bloom. More than I’m supposed to. More than is… professional. Why don’t you stay here? I can give you everything that Dr. Collier does and so much more.”

The air rushed out of my lungs in a gasp, my knees buckling as I gripped the back of the chair for support. I’d been wrong about him. I shouldn’t have come here. “What?”

“I’ve watched you unravel your past, put yourself back together, piece by piece. And I—” He dragged a hand down his face. “I shouldn’t be saying this. I shouldn’t feel this way, but I do. And the thought of you leaving, of never seeing you again…” His voice broke, raw with emotion.

My chest tightened, a deep unease unfurling in my gut. Other than Logan, no one had ever spoken to me this way. The hairs on my arms rose. I took a step away from him.

“Don’t look at me like that,” he said. “I am not saying anything bad. I want you. Surely, you know what that means now. At night, I stay awake because I can’t stop thinking about you and how much I want to take care of you, be with you.”

He reached out to me, but I took a step back, my skin crawling. “Don’t fucking touch me. This is the reason you’re always saying bad stuff about Logan.”

“He’s not right for you!”

“Fuck you!”

I ran toward the door, needing to get away from him.

“You can’t tell Logan about this visit!”

With my hand on the doorknob, I turned to face him. “Why not?”

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