Page 129 of Gunner

Even if Ben didn’t walk away from the force like he’d said he would, we would make it work. Of course, we still had the current problem to fix. If only I knew how to get him to trust me.

“If you say so. Now me? I’m realistic. Not sure how long this thing with Dove will last.”

“I thought you liked them.”

“They’re not monogamous, and they’ve been upfront about that from the beginning. I mean, it’s just been us, but sometimes I can’t help thinking they’ll get tired of my ass soon.”

Why on earth would Saint open up that much to me? I didn’t want to hear his private story, but he looked unbothered by sharing. Had we become close over discussing plans for the club?

Were we… friends?

“Err, isn’t there someone else you can tell this shit to? Crowe?”

“Nah, we don’t talk about shit like this. Plus, he’s so deep in Max he barely has time to come up for breath.”

I snorted a laugh. “Winter?”

“Still living in yesterday.”

“Damn, but seriously, y’all need to do something about him.”

“Crowe always tries, but this time he says only Winter can truly help himself stay sober. Man, you’ll talk about everything else except why you’re ignoring the party.”

“You really want to know why?”

“Why not? You listened to me bitch about this thing with Dove, didn’t you?”

I placed my elbow on the side of the truck and faced Saint, but the words didn’t come. I couldn’t talk to him about this. Not when I had to see him tomorrow morning. I’d rather spill my guts in front of a stranger. And I knew just the stranger.

“Forget it.”

“Suit yourself, man.” He slid down and ambled back toward the clubhouse. “Life doesn’t have to be so lonely, Gunner. I’m here if you want to talk.”

I didn’t call the reverend like he’d told me to. What I needed to say had to be said face-to-face. The whole spilling my guts over the phone didn’t sit right with me. No way to tell if the person on the other line had you on speaker so other people could hear how pathetic you sounded. I wasn’t taking that risk.

The next day, I snuck into Homer’s church. I’d waited outside until all the members left, but his truck was still in the parking lot. Crossing the street, I glanced around to ensure no one was around. I slipped inside the church, too familiar with the interior from AA, I didn’t have to wander around. I headed straightdown the hall. The stairs led to the basement, where we had AA meetings. To the left were the restrooms, and at the end of the hall was the office.

I hesitated with my hand raised, but then I forced myself to knock. I didn’t like being here, and I sure as hell wasn’t looking forward to the conversation, but better him than anyone else I had to face daily.

“Come in.”

I pushed the door open, then stopped dead in my tracks. The reverend stood with his robes parted, and a blond man was kneeling in front of him, sucking his dick. The man turned his head, and my jaw dropped.

“You!” Winter scowled. “Why are you always here?”

The reverend closed his robes and fiddled with his clothes. “Get up,” he hissed at Winter, then frowned at me. “Why did you enter?”

“You s-said come in,” I stammered. How much use could he be to me if he was caught with his pants down? But even a man had to take care of his needs.

Damn, it was weird, though. He always seemed to have his shit together, but here he was getting head from a crackhead.

“I saidcoming,” he said, enunciating slowly.

“I can always come back.”

“No, you’re already here, so it’s obviously important.” He yanked at Winter’s arm. “Get up and leave.”

Winter pouted. “But we’re not done.”

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