Page 92 of Teacher of the Year

“I’m gonna go,” I stammer.

Eager for one last taste, my lips kiss his forehead. I stand up. My head spins at the sudden change in height. I take a few deep breaths and mentally direct my feet to move. I glance back. A few yards away, Olan hasn’t moved from the stone wall. His face is back in his hands, and my heart wonders how long until he moves. I turn toward my apartment and trudge home, finally releasing the tears from their cages and allowing them to fly.

Chapter30

Gonzo does his best to comfort me, but my tears confuse him. I’ve set up camp on the couch with a box of tissues, the comforter from my bed, a bevy of delivery menus, and Gonzo tucked under the covers, nestling in between my legs. Too lazy to get up, I keep a neat pile of dirty tissues on the coffee table until I’m forced up for the bathroom. Vincent would be proud.

I’ve put an old rom-com on, but not even the familiar story and satisfaction of their happily-ever-after comforts me. Once again, I’ve managed to fuck up something good. No, not good, amazing. I really should’ve known better than to fall for a hot dad. It feels like the ultimate rookie mistake, beyond naive. Maybe I’m just not able to love someone the way Olan deserves to be loved. Or maybe I’m not loveable. Fuck. My brain usually keeps me out of such trouble, so why did I let my dick take the lead this time? Getting involved with Olan was a monumental misstep on my part. My head knows that, but why does my heart feel as cold and empty as Elijah’s chair?

My phone vibrates on the coffee table and Gonzo stirs slightly. I contemplate grabbing it and throwing the damn thing against the wall because speaking to anyone right now feels like cruel and unusual punishment. As I reach to check the perpetrator, there’s a tinge of hope in my stomach. Maybe it’s him.

My head is dizzy, and a sudden chilly feeling starts in my belly and expands to my fingers and toes. It is him. Not him. Not Olan. Adam. Why the hell would he be calling in my hour of sorrow?

“Hello?” Why do I answer like I don’t know who’s on the other end?

“Vin, it’s Adam.” Hearing his old nickname for me makes my skin prickle.

“Adam, hey, um, how are you?”

I grab a tissue and pat my eyes, hoping he can’t somehow hear the puffiness of my face.

“Fantastic. Things are great. Mark and I are headed to a dinner party in a few, but I wanted to give you a quick call.”

At least I know it won’t be a long conversation.

“Cool, um, what’s up?” I ask because why the hell are you calling me now and interrupting my misery?

“I heard you were up for Teacher of the Year, and I wanted to congratulate you.”

Gulp. I’m not sure how he found out. There have been a few articles in local papers. Clearly, someone told him.

“I know how much teaching means to you, Vin. You’re so damn dedicated. I always knew you were a brilliant teacher. Your kids mean the world to you. I’m so proud of you.”

Olan’s words echo in my head. You give your job everything. You throw yourself into teaching. This damn award. I reach for another tissue and exhale sharply, away from the phone.

“Oh, um, thanks. Yeah, it was a big surprise. The nomination, I mean. Actually winning the county, I didn’t expect it, so it’s all a bit of a whirlwind.”

“Well, you deserve it.”

“Aw, thanks, Adam. That means a lot.”

He’s attempting to be nice, and I sort of hate him for it.

“How’s everything else? Gonzo? You seeing anyone?”

Has he found out? Who would have told him? Is that the real reason he’s calling?

“Gonzo’s great. He’s right here. Still as clingy as ever, but of course I love it. Jill’s pregnant. They’re elated, and I can’t wait to be a guncle.”

“Sweet. Please tell her congrats from me.”

“And, not seeing anyone. Just me and Gonzo.”

Tears well up in my eyes and I blink to bat them away.

“Well, someone will be lucky to snag you. You’ll find the right guy. Don’t give up.”

“Yeah, thanks. Um, well, I should be going.” I rush him off because blubbering feels imminent.

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