Page 38 of Teacher of the Year

“Well, I’m pleased to know you won’t starve,” I say as he hands me his blue folder.

Children file in and greet me with a variety of fist bumps, waves, and hugs, as they hand me their folders and enter the classroom. I chat with them and ask questions about siblings, pets, lunches, and every random subject under the sun while peeking in folders and retrieving the odd note about a change in dismissal or an impending vacation.

I take a little extra breath with Illona’s arrival because simply the sight of her reminds me of her father and Friday night, even though she clearly knows nothing.

“Good morning, Mr. Block. I went to the movies yesterday!”

My mind immediately pictures Olan in the dark theater, watching the latest animated film with her, and a tiny sharpness prickles my chest, wondering why he didn’t reach out.

“Fun! That would be a perfect share for Morning Meeting.”

“Oh, good idea!” She hands me her blue folder and skips inside the classroom.

I peel back the cover of her folder and a small envelope with ‘Mr. Block’ written on it peeks up. I slowly pull it out and drop her folder in the basket. For about five seconds, I contemplate waiting to open it until I’m alone because a room full of small children bubbles around me, and I’m not sure how the contents will impact me. Not being a patient person, I carefully slip my finger under the end of the envelope and rip it open, pulling out a small, folded note.

Marvin,

Can we please talk after school?

Olan.

That’s it. Can. We. Talk. Can we snog on each other? Please? And now I have to endure the entire school day awaiting this conversation, but he wants to speak to me, which is much preferred to never communicating again. A wave of relief washes over me, and I inhale the deepest breath I’ve taken since Olan left my apartment Friday night. I move to tuck the note into my pocket and Jill appears in the doorway. Sure, I’ve been telling myself I’m not looking for romance, but when a man like Olan comes into your viewfinder, he’s really hard to ignore.

“I saw Illona and asked Brenda to watch my class… anything?”

I hold the note out like it’s both a treasure and burning my hand and hope she’ll grab it quickly. Which she does.

“This is good. He wants to talk. In person.”

The air entering and exiting my nostrils makes a loud whooshing noise.

“It’s going to be okay. I promise,” Jill assures me and spins to head back to her own brood.

Thankfully, the bedlam of kindergarten fills my day, and I don’t have much time to perseverate about Olan. Teddy has a terrible nosebleed, a gusher, and the adrenaline pumping through me to stop the surge of blood and help him calm down carries me through most of the morning. By the time we’re packing up to go home, I’m more than ready for the child-filled portion of my day to be over.

An empty feeling lingers in the pit of my stomach as Illona and I walk hand in hand to meet her dad by the dismissal table. This is what I’ve been waiting for, but I’m fearful. What if Olan tells me he’s made a horrible mistake? Can we still be friends? Could I handle that after what happened? It was only a kiss. But Lord, what a kiss. My head feels light and dizzy.

“Are you ready to go home?” I ask Illona, trying to calm myself with conversation.

“Yeah, I’m hungry. Daddy told me I’m going to have a snack and play on the playground for a little bit with Cindy. He said he needs to chat with you.”

“Did he?”

“Yup.”

A pause.

“Am I in trouble, Mr. Block?”

My legs come to a halt, and I tilt over so my face comes closer to hers because I need her to understand what I’m about to say comes from my soul.

“Illona, no, you’re most definitely not in trouble. Sometimes grown-ups need to chat about, well, grown-up things, but please, please listen to me. You have not done a single thing wrong.”

She sighs and turns her lips up, pulling me toward the table, her worry now assuaged. Olan and Cindy stand by the table waiting, and as much as I look, Olan’s face gives nothing away. He spots his daughter and lights up like a streetlight at dusk. They do their ritual where she leaps into his arms, and she squeezes his neck like a python. Cindy stands behind them smiling, and I can’t help but wonder what she may know about why Olan wants to chat with me. He clearly asked her to come and be with Illona, and they’re also definitely friendly since he escorted her to the restaurant opening. Cindy’s poker face reveals nothing.

Finally pulling back from their hug, Olan says, “Princess, remember I need to chat with Mr. Block for a few minutes. Cindy has a snack for you and will take you to the playground.”

On cue, Cindy unzips her oversized bag and pulls out a small package of cheese crackers that I would gladly gobble down right now because stress eating is one of my favorite pastimes. Olan pops Illona down, and she takes Cindy’s well-manicured hand, and they head outside. I’m keenly aware of the other adults. In addition to Dr. Knorse, Kristi is helping today. Various parents, grandparents, and other adults dot the hallway, awaiting their children.

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