Page 101 of Teacher of the Year

“No, it doesn’t work that way. There are many nominees. They won’t change the entire banquet for me.”

“Have you asked?”

“I can’t ask them to reschedule their entire event for me.”

“Well, talk to Orion. See what he thinks.”

My mother tends to have an answer for everything, and right now, we’re starting to turn in circles.

“He’s not really wanting to talk to me right now. I don’t know what to do. That’s actually why I’ve called you.”

“Oh, now I see.”

Ten minutes later, we finally get there. Slow and steady. I typically get frustrated with my mother’s misunderstandings, but today, I smile and laugh them off between deep breaths. Growth starts with baby steps.

“What does your heart tell you?”

My hand rubs the back of my neck. I focus on the base near my shoulder, attempting to massage the simmering pinch there.

“My heart? I know I love him. I know if I don’t do something to try and show him how I feel, regret will seep in through every crack and crevice.”

“So, there you go.”

“But, it’s a really big deal to be nominated for Teacher of the Year. The school needs the win too. It could really impact staffing. Plus, I’ve worked my tuchus off for this as well. You know we don’t get a ton of recognition as teachers, Mom, and this is a chance for me to shine a light on what I do.”

“I understand. The thing is, Marvy, I can’t tell you what to do. What day does this all happen?”

“Thursday night.”

“And there’s absolutely no way to do both? What time does it start?”

“The AA meeting starts at seven and the ceremony at seven thirty.”

“Well, you go to his AA meeting at seven and just leave at seven thirty.”

“I’m not sure that will work logistically.”

“Sleep on it. You don’t have to make a plan right now, but I bet there’s a way to do both, even if you’re a little late for your award thing. You and Orion, if you’re bashert, it will happen, meeting or not. Nobody can tell you what to do, Marvy. You need to sit with the question a bit. There’s no teacher’s edition with all the answers in the back of the book.”

“When did you get so wise, Mom?”

“It’s called getting old. You’ll get there. If you’re lucky.”

“Thanks, Mom. I love you.”

“I love you too, sweetie.”

I’ve got until Wednesday to figure this out. How badly do I want to be at the ceremony? How much does it matter? Dr. Knorse needs this win more than I do. Will they still give me the award if I don’t show up? Without the funding, the school will have to make cuts. It would devastate the community. But then there’s Olan. The way he looks at me. The way he makes me feel like we belong, like family. Isn’t that what matters most?

My mother’s words reverberate in my head. Showing up at Olan’s meeting would surely get his attention. How can I do both?

Gonzo jumps up on the couch where I’ve planted myself horizontally. He crawls up to my chest and stares at me as he begins to knead my chest.

“Gonzo, what would you do?”

He tilts his face slightly and headbutts my chin, rubbing his nose back and forth across my cheek. Pure love, covered in fur. Clearly, Gonzo won’t tell me what to do either. I let out a big sigh, and Gonzo pauses as the air from my nose blows against his face. He blinks a few times and resumes pummeling my chest.

Chapter33

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