Page 76 of Hold on Tight

But she hadn’t. And if the same question had been on his mind, he hadn’t said so.

She realized she was holding her breath. Waiting for his answer.

“We’ve been spending a lot of time together,” Jake said cautiously.

It wasn’t until her heart sank that she realized that she’d wanted more from him. That she’d wanted an emphaticyes. Even though she wasn’t sure she would have given an emphatic yes if their situations had been reversed. Even though she had more questions than answers in her own mind.

“But—”

She wanted him to stop. She wanted him to look at her and hesitate and invite her to help him answer this question. She didn’t want him to dive ahead and say, “But Mira just came off a serious relationship and she’s still trying to get her feet back under her. And I’m thinking about trying to get myself returned to active duty.”

“No!”

That was Jake’s mom. And Mira knew how she felt, though she’d vowed years and years ago that she’d never again say or do anything with the intention of holding him back.

“It’s a long shot, Mom. Some AK guys, it’s just over, and that’s it. But I think I need to try. It’s just, you know, this is who I am.”

Jake’s mother turned away, looking into a far corner. She blinked back tears. “When?” she asked.

“Not sure,” he said. “I haven’t decided for sure.”

Susannah went to her mother and put an arm around her, and the two women clung to each other.

I want to be Susannah’s friend, Mira thought.

As if Susannah had heard her thoughts, she released her mom and turned back to Mira. “So—whoareyou, instant sister-in-law?”

“I’m not—”

“Mother of our instant nephew and grandchild, then? Tell us about yourself.”

No punches pulled in this family, for better or for worse.

“Mira paints these gorgeous watercolors. She’s interested in becoming a children’s book illustrator.”

She gave Jake a look.

“It’s true,” he said mildly.

“It was true,” she said. “Before Sam.”

There was a moment of silence, during which she imagined they were all individually dying to know the story ofthat. Well, they’d have to wait. “I do user-interface design for a website that sells shoes. I figure out how users want to use the site and I design it to make it easiest for them.”

“Is that more like graphic design? Or more like computer programming?”

“It’s a little of both,” she said. “It’s actually more of a business role, in some ways. I’m trying to understand customers, understand how to make them more likely to buy, more likely to finish transactions successfully, more likely to come back. It’s an interesting mix of skills.”

“Sounds like it,” Susannah said. “And you’ve been—raising Sam on your own?”

She nodded.

“That must have been hard.”

“Sometimes very hard. But rewarding, too. I had help. From my parents. I was living with them in Florida until recently.”

“Was it a permanent move? Out here?” Janet asked.

Mira couldn’t help smiling at the transparency of that question, and at the way all those sets of eyes anxiously pinned her. “Yes. I’m planning to stay.”

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