Page 5 of Holding Out

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“So, what happened to your date?”Alia asked Becca, hanging the dishcloth over the oven handle.

They had just finished the end-of-evening straightening up—putting the last of the dishes away, wiping down the counters, washing out the sink.Mira and Jake had gone home, and Griff was making a beer run.He said it was poor form to leave your hosts beer-less after such a great evening, and since he’d been responsible for a good quarter of the beer consumed, it was his God-given duty to remedy the situation.Nate stayed behind to put Robbie down.

“Whatever.The guy was just an asshole.”Becca pulled out the stool from the kitchen island and sat.Alia took a seat next to her.

Becca knew if she told her sister the story, she’d end up feeling sorry for herself, and New Becca didn’t feel sorry for herself.New Becca was brave and bold and believed in herself.New Becca went after what she wanted and if someone else didn’t like it, that someone could fuck himself.She had watched her sister come out of her shell, and it had inspired Becca to do the same.She was still a work in progress, but she was proud of how far she’d come.

“Becca.”

Unfortunately, Alia was the best bullshit detector—or at least the best detector of Becca’s specific brand of bullshit—on earth.There was really no getting around it.Becca sighed.“We were sexting before the date we were supposed to have tonight.He said some stuff—”

“What kind of stuff?”Alia demanded, sisterly antennae obviously on high alert.

“Rough-ish stuff he wanted to do to me.Notbadrough, just ...”

“Not first-timer stuff.”Alia sighed.She obviously could feel the punchline coming.

Becca shook her head.“Not first-timer stuff.So, I figured I’d better tell him.And he said he didn’t do virgins.”

“He—he saidwhat?”

Alia might have been surprised, shocked even, but Becca hadn’t been.Not at all.She shook her head.“There are two categories of guys—the ones who are falling all over themselves to pop my cherry because it’s some kind of virgin fetish thing or they think I’ll be extra tight or whatever, and the ones who can’t put enough distance between themselves and me because of the stupid myth that no woman can ever get over her first time.”

It was Alia’s turn to shake her head.“There are guys who aren’t like that.”

Becca raised her eyebrows.“Really?You should introduce me to them, because I can’t figure out where they live.”

Alia snaked an arm around her sister’s shoulders and squeezed.“You’ve just had a run of super bad luck with men.”

That was true for sure.So many jerks and losers, bad blind dates, non-starters, and all-around assholes who’d said hurtful things without a second thought.Not to mention the awkward situation with Nate before he and Alia had gotten together, which was now just a humorous footnote.But none of that had hurt like what Todd had done.

Probably nothing ever would hurt like what Todd had done.

“You know what, hon?Those guys don’t deserve your virginity.”

That made Becca smile.“Well, I’m not sure it’s such a cherry on top at this point, but I like the way you think.”

Upstairs, they could hear Nate singing Robbie a lullaby.Nate was a great guy, even if he could get a little too into the big brother role at times.She was so damn happy for her sister.Now, if only she could find someone like Nate for herself.

She had a flashback to the ovary-busting sight of Griff grinning stupidly at Robbie.She was half tempted to ask Alia if she could have that photo, just to take it out and look at it on shitty days.But that would probably be a bad idea.She had a half-crush on Griff already, and he was a terrible choice for her.He didn’t even try to hide the fact that he was a player and a commitment-phobe.She couldn’t guess which of the two categories he’d fall into—virgin fetishist or run-screaming-in-the-other-direction—but either way, she wasn’t going to find out.

“Did you ever read Mom’s ratty old copy ofValley of Horses?”

Becca’s mouth fell open.All these years, she’d thought she was the only Drake sister to have discovered the dog-eared book—which had originally been their grandmother’s—and read it by flashlight in a closet.Even though she’d been what teachers referred to as a reluctant reader, she’d devoured every page of that big, fat saga with wide-eyed delight (and damp panties).

“Oh myGod.Ilovedthat book.Jondalar and his mighty wang.It was like a magic wand, devirginizing women everywhere.First Rites of Pleasure.You’re right!That’s exactly what I need.I need my own personal Jondalar.”

Alia laughed.“Totally.Do they have guys like him anymore?”

“Yeah, they call them escorts.And don’t think I haven’t considered that.”

Alia’s eyes got big.“You wouldn’t actuallydoanything like that, would you?”

She sounded genuinely concerned, which made Becca roll her eyes internally.Her sister had so little faith in her judgment.“No, of course not!No hiring people to take my virginity.As tempting as it is.”She bit her lip.“Somehow, I don’t think the reality would match my fantasy of Jondalar laying me down on a bed of furs.”

“Nothing’sthatgood,” Alia said, a faraway look in her eyes.

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