Page 91 of Sin and Redemption

“I know it might look odd, but I like talking to her. I want her to know that I love her.” Tears shone in her eyes, and fuck, if that didn’t make me feel as if someone had put my black heart in a vise.

I moved my palms down from her hands and put them flat against her rounded belly beside hers. “I know she can feel your love every second of the day.” My voice felt scratchy and rough. I cleared my throat, not sure how to do this. Expressing feelings still felt awkward, as if I was being unmanly. “Hey, little Ambra,” I began, even if I felt like the biggest idiot on the planet.

“We don’t have to use that name. We can pick one together,” she whispered.

“I trust your intuition, and I love the name. I don’t see a reason we should pick another one.” I could tell how much this pleased her.

I looked down at my hands on Sara’s belly because I couldn’t look into her eyes while saying what I wanted to say. Today as I worried about her life, my feelings for Sara had become crystal clear.

“Hey little Ambra, I just want you to know I’m so happy about you. And I know you can feel it every day, but your mom loves you so much.” I cleared my throat again because it felt fucking tight and dry. Could the baby even hear us? I wasn’t sure, but just the chance that she might made this feel like a monumental moment. “We can’t wait to hold you.” Sara moved her hands on top of mine. I didn’t mind making a fool out of myself when it meant Sara felt better. Today must have been hard for her if she couldn’t fall asleep. What I wanted to say next was even harder. I wasn’t sure I could actually do it. I had never tried. “And I want you to know that I will love you every day of my life just like I love your mom.”

My head felt hot, and I couldn’t look at my reflection in the mirror. Emotions were hard.

“Oh, Maximus,” Sara said in a shaky voice. “I love you too.”

I looked up, shocked. I hadn’t expected Sara to say it back, especially because I didn’t even have the balls to tell her directly. Get a grip, man.

“I love you.” I blew out a breath, feeling out of my element.

Sara gave me an understanding smile, her eyes watery. “You don’t have to say more. Some things don’t require an explanation.”

“I doubt there’s a reasonable explanation why you would love me.”

“Oh, but there is,” she said firmly, her gaze unwavering and certain. “But even if there wasn’t. Love doesn’t need a reason.”

“What I said today about revenge giving my life a purpose was bullshit. I don’t need revenge for that. Having you in my life has given me more satisfaction and happiness than I’d ever thought possible.”

Sara’s belly twitched under my palms. I froze and stared down at our hands. Had I imagined the twitch?

“Did you feel her?” Sara asked with wide eyes and quickly put her hands beside mine. “She’s very active, but she’s never kicked me this hard before, never hard enough that I could feel it on the outside.”

Another twitch followed. Sara clapped a hand over her mouth, tears falling down her cheeks. “It’s her way to show us that she heard everything.”

I put my chin down on Sara’s head and closed my eyes, simply feeling the gentle movements of our child. Who knew that such a small thing could make me so happy?

My due date was today, but there wasn’t a single sign that our daughter would make her way into the world anytime soon. I didn’t want to be induced or have a cesarean, but if baby girl didn’t come within the next forty-eight hours, my doc advised me to go to a hospital.

“Can we go to your parents’? I’d really like to visit the old oak.” This place had become such a vital part of this pregnancy and my life that I felt the need to visit it once more before the birth of our daughter turned my life upside down.

Maximus gave me a doubtful look. “You could give birth at any moment. We should stay close to the hospital.”

“I’m a first-time mother. It’ll take many hours before I give birth, so even if I go into labor at your parents’, there will be plenty of time to drive back to the city.”

After a few more arguments, Maximus finally caved, and we headed for his parents’.

It was a beautiful spring day, sunny and cloudless, but still quite fresh. The air was crisp, and the birds chirped excitedly, welcoming the warmer weather.

Only Cara was home, and she prepared tea and cookies for us. Maximus took in the fixed fencing as Cara and I sat on the porch with mugs of tea and wrapped into cozy blankets. Due to the damage the shelter had sustained, certain parts of the fencing needed constant repair. After a while, I felt restless, and the pain in my lower back, which had increased in the last few hours, became impossible to ignore. “Can we take a walk?” I asked as I rose to my feet.

Maximus came over, a frown tightening his face. “Are you okay?”

“Just restless.”

“Don’t go too far, all right?” Cara urged, regarding me with open worry.

I gave her a smile and nodded, then Maximus and I strolled into the forest, hand in hand. We stayed on the path as it wasn’t as bumpy and had been mostly cleaned of fallen leaves and twigs. Bacon accompanied us, trotting a few steps ahead and scanning the area. Since the attack, Maximus and his brother had set up intelligent motion cameras at the border of their premises that could distinguish between animal and human movements.

Despite the cool air, I felt incredibly hot in my coat. I felt half tempted to undress, which was completely crazy. When we arrived at the old oak, I took my coat off despite Maximus’s protest.

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