Page 86 of Part & Parcel

“Does he leave any information about this kid?” Owen asked shakily. “His name, what year he was born so we can find him?”

Zane nodded, rubbing his thumb over the scrawled words in the bottom corner of the letter. “It’s here, yeah.”

Owen nodded. Whatever happened from here on out, Zane knew without a doubt that Owen was going to find Elias Sanchez’s son. He held his hand out for the letter, and Zane gave it to him with a nod.

Owen cleared his throat, scanning the paper before reading off the last lines with a tremor in his voice that seemed to give it so much more poignancy than Zane’s reading ever could have managed. “Now that I’ve confessed,” he said softly. “It’s time for each of you to let the rest of us help you carry that weight. We’re your brothers. And no matter what’s said tonight, we will always love you.”

Owen put the paper down and lowered his head, ending the last word on a sob. He took a moment to compose himself, then looked around the table at all of them. He took a deep, shuddering breath before speaking again. “I never should have left that night in the bar, when you came out to us,” he told Ty. “I never should have walked away. What I did . . . I’m so sorry, Six.”

Ty nodded, attempting to speak but unable to. He closed his eyes to try again. Owen got up and rounded the table behind Zane, sliding onto the bench next to Ty.

Ty raised his arm and pulled Owen into the huddle he was still sharing with Nick, then he sniffed and glanced at the others. “Well you all know what my secrets were. I should have trusted you with them earlier.” He met Zane’s eyes. “You too, Lone Star. So much earlier.”

“What’s past is past, right?” Zane tried.

Ty shook his head. “Past is past, but it can still hurt like an open wound. I never understood that before you. I . . .”

Zane realized he was fighting tightness in his throat, influenced by all the waterworks going around the table from normally unflappable men. He swallowed hard and nodded, hoping to keep his composure until the end of the session.

Digger reached for Owen’s glass of water and downed it, setting it down with a clank. “I can’t think of any secrets,” he admitted, sounding forlorn over the news. He lowered his head, twisting his fingers together like he was ashamed of not having a deep dark secret to share like the others did.

Kelly placed a hand on his shoulder, shaking him gently. “You like fire, bud. You just can’t hide it anymore,” he suggested, a gentle smile accompanying the tease. He and Digger chuckled, and Digger was nodding, a gleam in his eyes that was quite frankly terrifying.

“Wait,” Digger said suddenly, the gleam morphing into a light of understanding as he glanced around at everyone. “No, wait, I got something.”

Kelly leaned back, his hand still on Digger’s shoulder and his head cocked, probably so he could see Digger’s face better.

“I guess it ain’t really a secret ’cause I wasn’t keeping it on purpose. But still . . .” He frowned briefly, his focus on the tabletop now. He seemed more confused than nervous. “I don’t really like sex.”

Ty and Nick both tilted their heads in a perfectly timed motion that almost made Zane laugh. Digger glanced around, and for the first time in Zane’s memory, he seemed self-conscious.

“Are you asexual?” Kelly asked carefully.

“That mean I don’t really like having sex?” Digger asked, and Kelly shrugged and nodded. “Then I guess so.”

“But . . . all those women?” Owen said.

“Seemed like what I was supposed to do,” Digger answered, pursing his lips and then chewing on the inside of his cheek. “Sometimes I’d go home with a girl, and we’d watch a movie. Or play card games. I never really enjoyed it, thought there was something wrong with me.” He glanced at Kelly with a weak smile. “Never knew there was a word for it.”

Kelly scooted closer and hugged Digger, patting his back and murmuring to him under his breath. Zane could see the relief in Digger’s body language, and he understood. All those years of wondering if he was broken, faking it because he thought that was what he should be doing. Zane suddenly wished he’d spent more time trying to get to know Digger, rather than writing him off as batshit crazy. He’d work harder at it from now on, and that went for every member of Sidewinder.

Kelly finally kissed Digger’s forehead and squeezed him one more time, then he straightened and took a deep breath, wincing as looked at Nick. “Whenever we went out, when we were all rooming together, and I saw Ty picking up a girl? I’d wingman Eli so he’d hook up with someone and kick me out of my room, and then cockblock Nick so he’d end up alone that night and either have to share the couch with me, or offer to let me bunk with him.”

Nick finally looked up over his fingers, still covering the lower part of his face with his hands. He stared at Kelly for a long time before he began to laugh. The chuckles infected the others, and Zane grinned across the table.

“How did you two not fuck ten years before?” he finally asked them.

Kelly shook his head. “I just didn’t understand what I was feeling. I knew it felt right being with him, but I didn’t really register the difference between friendship that was comfortable and right, and something more.” He bit his lip, pushing a coaster across the table and giving Nick a sideways glance. Nick smiled gently at him, and Kelly returned it.

“It wasn’t until Ty and Nick both started talking about being bi that I started thinking that there were different . . . I don’t know. I started self-analyzing a little. And after you all were sent back, after I asked Nick to kiss me that first time and realized it feltright, I started looking around for some answers, trying to understand. There’s a term called demisexual that . . . it means you’re only sexually attracted to someone you have a deep emotional connection with, and I think maybe that sounds a little like me. I mean, it doesn’t fit entirely, but it’s a start. And I think maybe that’s one of the reasons I sucked at being married.” He stopped and blinked hard at Nick, a blush coming over him as the silence caught up to him. His thumb was pushing furiously at the ring on his finger, spinning it around and around. “Married to the wrong person, anyway.”

Zane wasn’t the only one who noticed Kelly fiddling with that claddagh ring on his finger. “Are you two engaged?” Ty blurted.

Kelly didn’t take his eyes off Nick, but he was grinning when he ran his teeth over his bottom lip and nodded.

Zane found himself grinning widely as the others all reacted. Ty tightened his grip around Owen’s and Nick’s necks, pulling them both closer to him to hug them. Possibly against their will, considering the way they both struggled for air. And Digger got a hold of Kelly’s shoulders and shook him happily.

“Why the hell didn’t you say so earlier?” Owen asked once he freed himself of Ty’s grasp.

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