Page 14 of Part & Parcel

Kelly kissed him so he wouldn’t have to try to keep explaining. Nick’s warm fingers spread over Kelly’s spine as their bodies pressed tight. Nick pulled his other leg up, squeezing his thighs against Kelly’s hips and then sliding his foot against Kelly’s calf, wrapping around him in a way he so rarely did even when his body was completely healthy. Kelly rolled his hips, settling between Nick’s legs as the kiss grew more heated.

“You feel good there,” Nick gasped against Kelly’s lips. Nick’s fingertips were at the small of Kelly’s back, fumbling at the thick leather of Kelly’s belt like he was trying to secure a handhold on a vertical climb.

“I’ve fucking missed this,” Kelly growled, kissing at Nick’s neck and chest.

Nick let his good knee fall to the side, giving Kelly room to get closer.

Kelly pushed from his knee, aiming closer for a kiss, but he wound up driving his hips against Nick harder than he’d intended, dragging the shaft of his hard cock against Nick’s groin. Kelly gasped as a jolt of pleasure blazed through him. Nick’s mouth fell open and he squeezed his eyes shut, back arching. He hadn’t made a sound, and Kelly couldn’t tell if the wince was because it had felt good or if he’d hurt him.

“Sorry.” Kelly slid his fingers into Nick’s hair.

When Nick opened his eyes to meet Kelly’s, the dim lights caught the spark in them. Kelly realized he was gaping as they stared at each other, their breaths coming in staccato bursts, their heartbeats pounding in time with each other’s.

“Felt good,” Nick huffed. The answer had been almost immediate, but to Kelly it felt that time was slowing. Maybe even reversing.

He continued to stare, continued to pet Nick’s hair, continued the rhythmic rocking of his hips that felt so damn good.

“Kels,” Nick grunted, and he pushed his legs together hard, squeezing Kelly’s hips between his thighs.

Kelly shook himself from the spell and looked down to where their chests were pressed together, where Kelly’s unbuttoned shirt was caught between them and the buttons were digging in. “Sorry. God, I’m a little nervous, babe. Like this is our first time or some shit.”

Nick worked his fingers loose from Kelly’s belt and reached for Kelly’s face with both hands. “Me too,” he confessed. He smiled gently, and something about it eased the butterflies in Kelly’s belly. Then Nick licked his lips, and the infamously nervous gesture from his boyfriend immediately ratcheted up and amplified the tumbling again. “Kels,” Nick started, but he hesitated long enough for Kelly to find a whole new level of anxiety.

“We should have just fucked on theFiddlerlike you wanted to,” Kelly said in a rush. “This is way too much pressure to put on both of us, what the hell was I thinking? Thinking this would be a good idea?” He pushed away from Nick, breaking Nick’s hold, sat back on his haunches and shook his head as he stared at the fancy fucking headboard of their fancy fucking hotel room. “Haven’t had sex since before you almost died, it’s obviously stressful for both of us, why the fuck did I think, ‘Hey, let’s pretend we’re on a date’ would take the pressureoff? Why do you let me plan shit?”

Nick snorted. When Kelly returned his attention to Nick’s face, Nick was watching him fondly, a crooked smile on his lips, his body relaxed. He slowly straightened out his bad leg, pushing his knee in so that it grazed Kelly’s hip on its way past him. Kelly realized he was kneeling between Nick’s splayed legs, and his cock jumped as he let his eyes stray down Nick’s naked body.

“It was a good idea, babe,” Nick said.

“But you’re nervous. And I’m nervous.”

“I know. But I’m not nervous because of performance pressure or whatever the fuck you’re freaking out about. Come back here.” He reached for Kelly, barely able to touch the tips of his fingers to Kelly’s exposed chest.

Kelly huffed as he struggled out of his shirt and tossed it over the end of the bed. He leaned over again, both hands propped on either side of Nick, and he was peripherally aware of Nick’s bent knee pushing out to the side again. Nick slid his hands up Kelly’s arms and onto his chest, then trailed his fingers down and around until he’d encircled Kelly in a hug as Kelly carefully rested his weight on him.

“I was nervous because . . .” Nick’s eyes darted back and forth as he looked into Kelly’s. “I want to ask you to do something for me, but I don’t want you to feel like you have to if you don’t want it.”

“You know I’d do anything for you.” Kelly kissed Nick to emphasize his sincerity.

“I know, babe,” Nick forced his eyes open after the kiss. “But this is for you.”

Kelly straightened up. He realized he was frowning, and he tried to school his expression a little better. “Okay.”

Nick’s hands turned gentle on Kelly’s back, barely a caress as he stuck his fingers back under Kelly’s belt. “Will you top me?” Nick asked, unblinking as he gazed at Kelly.

Kelly’s mouth fell open, and he would have sworn that his heart skipped a beat or five. “Top you?”

Nick nodded. “Means you’d do the fucking.”

“Yeah, I know what it means.”

“See, it didn’t look like you knew—”

“Nick!” Kelly pushed up again, but this time Nick didn’t let him get away. He locked his fingers at Kelly’s spine, and Kelly was forced to lie back over him, their bodies rubbing, Kelly’s cock enjoying every second of it.

“If you don’t want to it’s okay,” Nick continued. “I just . . . thought . . .” He cleared his throat and pressed his lips together as he held Kelly’s gaze, obviously trying not to display how nervous he still was. “Thought it would be easier.”

Kelly was torn between wanting to allay his nerves, and enjoying the rare show of insecurity. Even during his recovery, when Nick had been so vulnerable, he’d rarely been unsure like this. It was charming. Every fiber of Kelly’s being wanted to wrap him up and cuddle him.

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