Page 98 of Amnesia

So many questions…

Only one answer.

“I’m not going to leave you, Am. No matter what. I love you. No matter what.”

“No matter what?” she echoed.

I lifted her hand, wrapped mine around it, and held out our pointer fingers. Making a large X over my heart, I said, “Cross my heart.”

“Make love to me, Eddie.”

My hand jerked, dropping hers. “What?”

She smiled, partially amused.

“Considering the conversation we just had, you have to realize that right now, I think I’m hearing things.”

“That’s why we just had this conversation,” she replied, stroking her palm down my chest. “I wanted to make you understand. I feel like there’s a clock ticking inside me, and every second, every minute, every day that passes us by is a moment lost. Another moment closer to when my brain unleashes hell upon me.”

I groaned.

Am grabbed my face, staring into my eyes. “Make love to me before it matters who I am. Before identities and terrible recollections come into play. Show me what it’s like to be in love—to be loved—before memories shatter the idealistic mind I own right now. Prove to me that there can be so much more between two people than pain.”

Give the woman I loved a first time that could overshadow everything else? No pressure or anything.

I couldn’t say no to the woman in my lap. I wouldn’t.

“C’mere.” I reached for her. She came without hesitation, her body malleable beneath my hands. Delving my fingers into the hair at the base of her skull, I directed her down, our lips meeting softly.

I coaxed her open, using gentle strokes and soft pressure. Our lips met again and again. Occasionally, I would draw back enough to nibble at her lower lip and massage her scalp with my fingertips.

Amnesia’s body remained relaxed. Not once did she hesitate or grow tense. I kissed her languidly, slowly, for an undocumented amount of time. Eventually, I moved, laid her against the cushions, and wedged myself beside her. Our legs were tangled and my arm was across her chest. I nuzzled her neck, licked over her collarbone, and whispered in her ear.

Her heavy sighs were quite the reward, and her roaming hands only spurred me on. Eventually, I pulled back to gaze down at her.

“Eddie?” she asked, rubbing a hand over my hair. “What is it?”

“You really do want this. Me,” I said vulnerably.

Her lips curved up. “I really do. So much. This isn’t some experiment or some sick way to try and trigger a memory. I don’t want that. Just you. Just Eddie and Am together. Alone. Nothing or no one else.”

Her body didn’t lie. The languid feel of her limbs and the way her body arched against mine when I kissed her couldn’t be faked. Nothing about this was making her upset, scared, or nervous. She was totally in the moment with me, just like she said.

I couldn’t prevent the past from coming back to haunt her. But I could give her a present, a present that bled into the coming days and promised something more.

Without another word, I moved over her, past her, my feet hitting the floor. Straightening up, I saw her watching me with a question in her eyes.

I smiled even as desire rolled beneath my skin, then picked her up, cradling her against my chest.

“Where are we going?” she murmured, laying her head against my chest. Clearly, she trusted me.

“I’m taking you to bed.”

“I have three rules.” Eddie’s voice brought my head up off his shoulder. His bedroom was at the back of the little house, a room I hadn’t yet seen. I barely gazed around because I didn’t really care what was in this room. I was more concerned withwhowas.

So much of life was unclear, especially for me. But there was something so sharp I knew it would always be in sight. Eddie. He was the first person I thought of when I lifted my head off the shower floor. The person I wanted to talk to first, despite having Maggie nearly plead with me to stay. It didn’t matter we’d had a fight. It didn’t matter my head told me not to trust him and that he was lying.

I trusted Eddie anyway. My heart didn’t care what my head said. My heart wanted him, and so did my body.

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