Page 96 of Bae

But these were my burdens to bear. It wasn’t her responsibility to know the weight I carried. My job was to carry it all… and hers as well.

The look on her face said it all. Of all the words I could have strung together, those never even crossed her mind.

What must she think?

What would she when I finally confided my own despair?

I guess even sometimes the strongest fought battles that threatened to bring them down. But I was still standing. My sword might be dull, my armor scuffed, but I wasn’t done fighting.

I would never stop.

However, the time had come for this silent battle to become pronounced.

“What?” Rimmel echoed as if in shock. Slowly, she turned away from the mirror, gently grabbed my wrist, and took the brush from my palm.

It made an audible click on the stone counter when she set it aside, but our eyes remained on each other.

I nodded. “I feel guilty, Rim, so goddamn guilty. I didn’t want you to know.”

She made a slight sound of distress, rushed the centimeters between us, and wrapped her arms around my waist. Her body pressed in close, gripping me like she was on a rollercoaster and I was the safety bar.

I was surprised. I didn’t expect a hug. I actually didn’t know what I expected.

Maybe part of me expected her repulsion.

It was irrational, though. Rim wasn’t like that, and she never would be. I knew this. Still, sometimes it was hard to reason with emotions that tried to break you down.

“C’mon,” she whispered, took my hand, and led me from the bathroom.

The bedroom was dim. Only the light from the bathroom filtered in. Both dogs were snoring but stopped and beat their tails against the floor as soon as Rim came into sight.

It made me realize something.

She was a collector of lost souls. The forgotten, the bypassed, the most beautiful at heart. Rimmel saw beauty no one else saw, and even though how she made others feel was amazing, it was nothing compared to the way it made her shine.

She would love me through this,in spite of this,because though my feelings were ugly, she would see beyond them.

I hit the switch for the fireplace, the subtle whooshing of flames catching with gas filling the room. Firelight shimmered through the room, giving everything an elusive glowing cast.

She perched on the side of the bed, her legs so short they hung off the side like she was a kid sitting in one of those folding movie theater chairs that half folded up on them because they weren’t heavy enough to keep the seat down.

Damp hair cascaded down her back, some thick, dark strands falling over her shoulders to frame her pale cheeks. They had a lot more color now. The pink was a little too pronounced. It reminded me of her taking an airbag to the face just hours before.

In the shower, I’d seen the bruises. A purple, mottled stripe covered her chest and collarbone from where the seatbelt had locked around her body. Her knee was bruised, too. She said she didn’t remember how it happened. My guess was she smacked it into the dash on collision.

There were more random bruises all over her. I tried not to look at them too long beneath the spray. They made me sick.

“God, when that call came through,” I said, my voice sounding choked inside my head. “I didn’t know how bad you were, what had happened… just the possibility of losing you, Rim.” I couldn’t finish. Instead, I shook my head.

“You didn’t.” She held her hands out to me. I stepped up. Rimmel leaned forward, pressing her forehead to the center of my stomach. My hands fell to her shoulders, one cupping the base of her neck.

“I don’t think I could survive it.”

“We survived Evie,” she whispered.

Beneath her head, my abs rippled as my muscles flexed.

“That’s the thing, Rim. The thing I can’t forgive myself for. I didn’t want you to know.”

---