Page 35 of Bae

I hated it. I rebelled against it.

Unfortunately, it only made the way I felt worse. Like a vicious cycle, the more I ignored it, the more those feelings insisted they be known.

I dropped down on a nearby tufted bench and sipped at the coffee I’d carried in here from the coffee bar in the kitchen. Trying to pick out an outfit was almost hopeless. Most definitely exasperating. If Ivy wasn’t already so busy with party prep, I’d go beg her to pick something for me.

I was tired, but I knew my lagging only stemmed from the feelings attempting to consume me. I took a deep breath, exhaled, then pushed to my feet.

What I wore really didn’t matter. It certainly didn’t require so much thought and effort. I snorted to myself because it was practically ridiculous I was even standing in here stressing about my outfit.

It isn’t your outfit you’re worrying about.

Abandoning my coffee to the white marble top, I plucked out a pair of distressed, light-colored, straight-legged jeans and tugged them on. Next, I grabbed a white and black stripped, long-sleeved top that felt really soft and comfortable (which were my two favorite things). Once it was on, I realized how loose it was and mentally groaned. Romeo’s parents would be here today. Ivy’s mom and Braeden’s mom.

I didn’t want to look like I didn’t bother at all.

But I didn’t want to change either.

Blowing out a breath, I grabbed a yellow lace bralette and pulled it on over the bra I was currently wearing but beneath the T-shirt. Frankly, the fact I managed that without falling over should have earned me a gold medal.

Once that was done, I glanced back up, grabbed a handful of the hem at one of my hips, and tied it into a knot. I stepped back to look at my attempt in the large floor mirror leaning against the wall.

Good enough.

It was super casual, but this was a one-year-old’s birthday party. It wasn’t a night at the Met. The knot made the shirt not so loose, and the lacey yellow strap from the bralette that showed at my shoulder was a nice accent.

At least I hoped it was.

I shoved my feet into a pair of white Converse and left the closet with my coffee. At the counter in the bathroom, I traded the caffeine for a hairbrush and studied the haystack on my head. Just the thought of trying to comb it out overwhelmed me.

I noticed again the pounding of my heart and the slight tremor in my fingers.

I wanted Romeo.

I was being silly. Stupid even. I didn’t need his arms right now or the comfort of his presence. I was in my own home, wearing my own clothes, and I had nowhere I had to go today outside the walls of the compound. It was a family day. I loved family days.

Romeo was already downstairs, helping Braeden set up a bounce house in the backyard. I smiled to myself because I was sure it was quite a spectacle, and I knew I should hurry to go down to see it.

Since trying to brush out all the knots in my bird’s nest wasn’t in the cards, I decided instead to comb it up and secure it into a messy knot on top of my head.

Ta-da! #Fancy.

Darcy and Ralph were lying on the foot of our bed, and when I stepped out, both their tails wagged. A little of the restlessness I felt went away when I looked at them. I paused to scratch behind both their ears, then called to them as I left the room.

Both dogs followed along behind me like shadows as we trodded downstairs. In the kitchen, Ivy was issuing orders to Drew and Trent.

“Don’t hang it like that! My God, think of the pictures!” She gasped.

I stopped and watched them with full-on amusement from beneath the stone archway that separated the kitchen from the great room.

“Your niece is going to look back on this day, not to mention the freshly painted walls—”

“Rimmel! Save us!” Drew interrupted Ivy when he saw me lurking.

Ivy made a sound and spun. “Thank God! A voice of reason! Just look. He’s trying to staple the banner to the ceiling.Staple!”

I giggled and looked up at Drew, who was indeed standing on a chair with a stapler in his hand.

“A stapler might not be the best way to go,” I told him with a wide smile.