Page 73 of When We Are Falling

We walk back to the truck in silence. Bandit perks up as we approach, his tail wagging enthusiastically, but even his usual doggy happiness can’t cut through the atmosphere that’s settled over us. We both open the truck doors at the same time, and I look at Blake across the seats, her perfect face framed by the open door.

“Princess, I think you need to resolve this with David one way or another. I know you want to help him, but you should probably think about just cutting contact at this point.”

Her eyes flash with anger. “Do notprincessme right now. You don’t understand—David is hurting, and he needs someone to believe in him. I can’t just abandon him.”

“He’s unpredictable and a danger to himself and possibly to you. Can’t you see that?”

She shakes her head. “He’s not a danger to me. We have a bond. He’s been through hell, but I know he wouldn’t hurt me. You don’t know him like I do.” She blows out a breath, her gaze locking onto mine. “Look, maybe I should walk home. I think I need some air.”

“Come on, I’m sorry. Please get in the truck.” I sigh, running a hand through my hair, frustration gnawing at me.

Her jaw tightens, and she crosses her arms across her chest. “But you’re asking me to cut off someone who’s been like a brother to me. I can’t just turn my back on him when he needs me the most.”

“I’m sorry. I just... I worry about you. I can’t help it. I want to protect you, but sometimes it feels like you won’t let me.”

She looks away. “I know you care. But this is something I have to handle my way. Please understand that.”

“I just want you to be safe.” My voice is softer now. “That’s all.”

Standing there silently, looking at her across the front seats of the truck, waiting. I won’t give up on her. Partners should protect each other and fight for one another with everything they have. My own parents’ marriage crumbled into a pile of resentment and anger, leaving nothing but bitterness between them.

I remember finding their wedding photos in a dusty box in my mom’s attic, seeing an unrecognizable version of them, so in love and happy, full of hope for the future. But they hated each other by that point in time, their love gone because they didn’t fight for it.

I’ve never been in love before Blake, but I know one thing for sure: I can’t let that happen to us. I have to fight for her, protect her with everything I have. If I don’t fight for what matters, we’ll end up like my parents—broken, miserable, and full of regrets.

She finally looks at me and I hold her gaze: “Please. Don’t shut me out. You can’t blame me for wanting to protect you.”

Her anger seems to dissipate slightly. “I know. And I appreciate that. But David needs help, and I can’t just cut him off. Please, try to understand.”

I nod reluctantly, knowing this isn’t a battle I’m going to win. Not now, anyway. “Okay. Please just get in the truck.”

She finally climbs in and I reach over and squeeze her hand. “Let’s not let this get between us?”

“Sure. But just drop me at home now.”

“Of course. I need to meet Patrick and the boys, anyway. Is everything okay between us?”

“Yep,” she replies, squeezing my hand again.

As we drive away from the shelter, I glance over at Blake, taking in the tension in her posture, the way her fingers drum anxiously on her knee. I know she’s thinking about David, aboutthe way he looked—so erratic, so clearly in the grip of his demons.

“I hate seeing him like that,” she says suddenly, her voice breaking the silence. “It brings back so much from when I was a kid. The things I went through with my dad.”

Of course.This has to be dragging up all kinds of bad memories for her. Memories of her father’s struggles with addiction, of the times she spent in foster care surrounded by uncertainty and fear.

I reach over, cupping my hand over hers, silently vowing to protect her with everything I have. “I can’t imagine how hard this all must be. But you’re not alone now. You have me.”

“Thanks. I do appreciate you. But you really need to back off a little right now.”

“I’ll back off, but I need to know you’re actually going to do something about this. Because if he turns up high and you’re alone, he might not be in his right mind. I’m sure sober David would never hurt you, but we can’t say the same now you know he’s using.”

She turns to look out the window, resting the side of her head against the glass. As we drive toward her house, I wish things were simpler, that Blake would just listen to me: this isn’t about abandoning David; it’s about protecting herself.

I can’t stand the thought of something happening to her because of him. But I know her well enough to understand that she needs to handle thisherway.

Although, if push comes to shove with David, I won’t be the one backing down. I love Blake, and when you really love someone, you fight for them with everything you have.

Chapter 32

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