Page 57 of From Best To Bested

That actually made Roman smile, which resulted in Levi brushing his fingertips against Roman’s cheek, happy to see his happiness. But as much as Roman liked the daydream, he needed to explain to Levi how things really operated here. It was more than just taking the title of champion.

“I’ve been building alliances,” Levi said, almost like he’d read Roman’s mind. “Ezra’s not nearly as beloved or feared as he wants folks to think. Soon enough, I’m going to take him out. I’m gonna lift you back up, too.”

Roman shook his head, dismissing the impossibility of him ever becoming more than where he’d fallen.

“You’ll be my equal, and people around here will respect that.”

“You can’t make people forget what I’ve done, what I’ve allowed to be done to me,” Roman said shamefully.

“I don’t care if they remember, but they will show you respect; they will treat you how you deserve,” Levi said. “Or I’ll get rid of them, too.”

Roman snickered at that. “Gonna get rid of everyone who wrongs me? Might be a long list.”

“You’d be surprised how creative I can get.” Levi stared at Roman. “If I’d known about Jake sooner, about his intentions, or that Ezra would fucking allow that, I would’ve ended him sooner.”

Shock spiraled through Roman’s thoughts. Levi couldn’t have… Jake’s crew was over twenty men… Jake himself was a fierce fighter, ruthless, and psychotic… And how he died… Levi could never.

“Wait…did you?” Roman lost the will to speak as he found himself quite lightheaded.

“I would do anything for you, Roman.” Levi placed a hand on Roman’s shoulder, steadying him. “I would quite literally burn the world down to protect you. I’m only sorry it took me this long to get here.”

Roman looked at Levi in awe. There was something humbling and frightening about the man Levi had grown into since they were divided. While Roman shrank and crumbled, Levi had grown into someone ferocious.

He didn’t know if he could trust it, trust Levi. Every part of him desperately wanted to, but he trusted Ezra. He had willed himself to trust and love and accept Ezra in every way, and now he would be swept aside like the trash he was. How couldsomeone like Levi ever care for Roman? How could someone who did something so brutally violent care about anyone?

“Did you really stab him forty-eight times?” Roman trembled, speaking in a low whisper.

“He laughed about what he’d done to you,” Levi said, his cold blue eyes staring off at nothing. “He laughed about what he had planned; he just couldn’t stop making jokes.”

Roman stared at Levi, wordless yet accepting. He didn’t know how to express it, if Levi understood the look, but he couldn’t fault his friend.

“Eventually, though, he stopped laughing.”

Roman didn’t know right from wrong anymore. He didn’t know what justified anything and where the line really fell. And truthfully, he didn’t care. There was a warmth that filled his chest over Levi’s protective actions. He worried Levi would tarnish his good soul, his kind heart, and over someone as expendable as Roman, but he wanted to believe in his friend. He wanted to believe in Levi’s plan. He wanted to believe he could really be happy again.

Roman leaned over, pressing his head on Levi’s shoulder, and the two sat in silence together. Levi’s calm breaths became rhythmic for Roman, and he relaxed in the gentle ebb and flow of Levi’s body. It’d been a long time since Roman felt comfortable with the quiet.

Chapter Twenty

In the days that followed Levi’s confession, his promise, Roman did his best to sort his feelings on the matter. Too much of his bandwidth stretched to worry for Levi and Ezra in equal measure. Even as Ezra continued being cold to him since the night Roman spent with Jake…with Jake and the other men. Roman twisted in his bed, ignoring the faint smell of sex that still lingered in the cell. Not sex with Ezra, no, he’d tired of Roman by this point. Roman could smell Jake, the other men, and himself. The perfume of lust and deceit made each breath excruciating.

Roman couldn’t outrun his memories of what he’d done, his thoughts of Levi’s promise, or his concerns for what would happen to Ezra. Worse, what would happen to Levi if he lost?

Roman snapped open his eyes. Was that worse? Was his worry for Levi stronger than Ezra’s? That gnawed and clawed at Roman’s insides. He buried the thoughts, the hope and desire he held for Levi, the happiness it filled him with, the curiosity that bubbled every time Levi approached. Roman wasn’t allowed to think such things. It wasn’t good for him, it wouldn’t be condoned by Ezra, and it wasn’t fair to Levi.

“Hey,” Ezra said, slipping off his top bunk and finally breaking the silence.

Roman sat up, eagerly awaiting more words, desperate to fill the silence from Ezra’s pause but worried he’d overstep and end the conversation prematurely. Roman didn’t want to overstep.

“Come suck my dick.” Ezra fished his cock out of his pants, expectingly.

“Sure.” Roman slipped off the bed quickly and crawled over on his knees to where Ezra stood.

It’d been so long since Roman and Ezra had been intimate. Intimate. That was a word Roman clung to about the arrangement. It helped sort his feelings, helped him accept his situation, and helped him come to terms with his sexuality.

There had been harsh words, ugly words, and Roman thought he’d lost their connection, their friendship, but as he went to work stroking and sucking Ezra hard, he believed this bond could be salvaged.

Roman would do better. He’d try harder. He’d make Ezra happy again. Everything would be okay.

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