Page 67 of Forever We Fall

I hope it has. I hope he never has to use the immense power he holds within himself ever again.

The door closes, and the shower turns on a moment later. He doesn’t bother with the light, and I’m grateful. It’s less to draw the eye.

I put my grandfather’s clean wakizashi behind my bed where I kept it, and the now empty duffel in the closet. And then I strip to my boxer briefs, pulling the night off me like skin and tossing it into the hamper. A deep breath fills my lungs, and I exhale the screams that have echoed in my head for the past few hours.

Then I wait. Twenty minutes later, the shower is still running, which isn’t a long time for most people. For Arlo, it’s an eternity.

I knock on the door gently.

There’s no response.

The halls are quiet still, so I don’t want to knock any harder. I crack the door open. “Arlo? Are you okay?”

A soft sob is my answer.

No, he’s most certainly not okay. Why should he be?

What we did was fucked. Justified in our minds. But. Oh. So. Fucked.

“I’m coming in.” I push into the small room and open the shower door, terrified to find him cutting himself once more.

Arlo’s head hangs low. His shoulders bob with each muffled cry. Water cascades over his beautiful body. A body I can’t fully appreciate. Not with him in such a state.

“Did you clean off?” I grab his towel from the rack. He nods, and his sobs settle, but shivers take over.

“Good.” I reach around him and turn off the faucet. Before I can get it off, several droplets hit my arm. It’s so cold I have to control the urge to jerk my hand back.

I wrap his towel around his trim waist and tuck it into itself. His skin is ice to the touch. I grab my towel, drape it over his shoulders, and then tug him out. With efficient hands, I scrub them over his covered skin, trying to dry him and generate heat at the same time.

“I…I…I’m s…sorry.” Arlo’s lips are blue, and his teeth clack together. I want to grab his face and press my lips to his.

“Don’t be.” Dragging my gaze away from his mouth, I work my hands over his chest, his back, and then drag the towel up to his hair.

Once that’s dry, I leave it around his shoulders, grab the hand towel from the sink, and dry his legs and feet.

“I…I am.”

I stand and grab the towel around his shoulders. I tighten it and force his gaze to mine. “I am not sorry about what we did tonight. You’re free, andyouare all that matters.”

“No.” His head shakes. Clumps of his wet lashes blink me in, as if for the first time since he went to be broken on holiday. “I’m s…sorry for shutting you out.”

My eyes close to keep my tears at bay. He doesn’t need them. Especially not tonight. I drag in a breath and smell Arlo’s skin. I smell the ashes of our hopes and dreams.

When I blink him into view, his eyes are sad. Somehow his sorrow doesn’t distract from his beauty. The sharp angles of his cheeks, the slope of his nose, his proud brow, the strength in his jaw, the plump of his lips, and the small but deep dark windows into his soul make his face the perfect specimen to be capturedby an artist’s brush. He is living art. August and unmooring, all at once.

“Protecting you is all that matters. If that means protecting you from me, that’s what I’ll do.”

His head shakes. “I trust you completely.”

If he knew the devious things rolling through my mind at any given hour of the day, where he’s concerned, he might not trust me so implicitly. I nod and steer him to his small built-in dresser with an even smaller wardrobe inside.

“Get dressed and get in bed.” I leave the door to the bathroom open. “I’m going to shower and bring my blanket in here for a change.”

He nods, and I leave while I can. I strip and shower quickly, also under cold water. Only it’s not because I’m too despondent to care. Nope. It’s because my dick is thick and hard and bobbing up my belly, begging to be drained.

I flinch against the cold. Eventually, my dick does too. I dress, grab my comforter, and make my way to Arlo’s room, stalling in the doorway.

He’s on his side with the covers clutched to his chin. I can’t tell if his eyes are open in the dark room. He’s too far away. So I wait.