Page 42 of Forever We Fall

It’s here, in his arms, I realize I love Hota.

I’ve known for a long time that he’s important to me. Integral even. He keeps me balanced when it would be so easy for me to teeter off the edge. He teaches me things. He cares for me. I knew I cared for him.

Now that Blakely is gone, I understand that I love him more deeply than I’ve ever loved anyone in my whole life. I hug him close and hope that I can be his guy the way he’s mine. Maybe even more.

I fall asleep, knowing I can.

I wake to the harsh realization that it was never an option for someone like me.

“Good morning,” Arlo whispers over my cheeks.

A smile tugs my lips before I even open my eyes.

Usually, he’s up and moving. Has had a shower or at least disappeared from my room, taking his blanket along with him. Now, his arm is under my neck, propping my head up with the help of my pillow. His other hand is firm on my hip.

I blink him into view, mussed hair, wide smile, and all.

“The best morning.” My fucking heart leaps and tosses confetti. The smile on my face grows tenfold. For the first time, I’m not afraid to scare him away because he let me touch him last night, and he’s touching me now. The slow caress of his fingertips is unadulterated bliss.

With two fingers, I reach up and shift the locks of hair off his forehead. “How are you feeling?”

He bites his lips, compressing his smile. His eyes glitter. A mix of curiosity, passion, and mischief shifts in them, creating a kaleidoscope of my favorite things.

I’ve seen so many sides of him, this openness he’s giving me, his happiness, is enough to shoot me into orbit. I never want to come crashing down. There’s no way I’d survive.

“You can tell me anything,” I remind him.

He nods, and suddenly, his teeth can’t contain his lips. They break free into a smirk. “I feel…hard.”

It’s a miracle I don’t swallow my tongue. The confetti in my chest turns into a pyrotechnic showcase. All of a sudden, I’m hot as hell. Hard as hell too. I want to roll him onto his back, worship every part of his body, and then suck him so well he forgets everything before us.

Caution is key. I know it.

Now I’m the one biting my lip, only it’s the bottom one and it’s meant to convey exactly how happy I am with his revelation, without throwing the covers back and showing him.

“That’s pretty standard for the morning.” I let my hand coast over his shoulder and down his arm that clings to my hip. “Is that why you usually rush out of here before I wake up?”

“Maybe.” He offers the most adorable grimace I’ve ever seen.

I hike a brow.

“Definitely.” His straight white teeth shine in the morning light.

“Have you taken care of yourself before last night?” I slide my hand to his and toy with his fingers on my skin. “With this hand right here?”

“No.”

I suck in a breath and let it out slowly. It almost turns into a moan. No, it definitely becomes a moan. A quiet one.

“And what made you touch yourself last night?” My lungs stop working in anticipation of his answer.

“You.” He twines his fingers with mine and holds them up between our hips.

I’m torn between looking at his face and our interlocked fingers. My gaze jumps back and forth in absolute awe. Our skin makes a beautiful pattern of light and tan.

“What about me?” I manage to squeak out the question.

“Your skin on mine. Your body touching mine. Your warmth and your shape. Hard and wide.”

---