Page 80 of Aria's Desire

“You’re brilliant. You, and you alone, invented something to protect people from being Veiled when no one else could or did. That’s absolutely incredible, Rellik, and would’ve been impressive as hell on its own. But you’re not just brilliant.”

Tracing his features with her gaze, she smiled softly.

“You’re cunning, insightful, perceptive. So fucking brave. Strong. You’re both optimistic and pragmatic in damn near equal measure, and you’ve somehow made it through the bullshit life has thrown at you with a core of goodness. You’re kind and devious and compassionate and honorable. You’re beautiful, Rellik, outside and in.”

Pulling him closer, Aria felt her expression twist with the anger burning in her chest.

“And I’ll be goddamned if I’m going to stand here and let you behave as though your only worth is in how good you fuck.”

Silent tears slipped down his cheeks, and his teeth were gritted so hard a muscle was standing out in his temple. He looked like she’d just ripped him to shreds.

Aria guessed she had, in a way.

He’d been treated as an object, had been told he was and could only ever be one thing for so long he’d accepted it, let it shape his view of himself. And there she was, tearing that down and making him see he was so much more.

Sometimes, to cope, you tell yourself the cage you’ve been put in is comfortable, that it’s where you belong because it’s safe there and it’s what’s expected of you. We all want to be accepted, so we tell ourselves we’re happy living in the confines forced upon us.

But it’s a lie.

However alluring, however gilded or safe it feels, it’s a prison, plain and simple.

“Tell me what you need, Rellik. Tell me what you want.”

Releasing him, she took a step back and waited. There was such vulnerability in his expression, such longing, more than a little fear, and even some anger. She was asking a lot of him. She knew that.

But she wouldn’t, couldn’t, let him stay in that cage. She wouldn’t let him treat her like one of those women who’d used him. And she wouldn’t let him treat himself like his only value was in the pleasure he could give.

She saw it the moment he made the decision, saw the fire of passion and steely-edged determination overtake the fear. He didn’t speak, just nodded slowly and walked backward, taking a seat on the bench.

He spread his arms along the edge of the pool, and let out a soft, shuddering breath.

Aria smiled, understanding. He was always the one touching, the one giving pleasure. He was choosing to trust her, to let go of that role he’d been trapped in for so long.

Chapter 39

Rellik’s heart was hammering in his chest. His eyes were glued to Aria as she approached and knelt on the bench beside him. He still couldn't find words, couldn’t unglue his tongue to speak, but she didn’t push him to.

They just stared at each other for a long time as she bathed him until slowly, gradually, he began to talk. He couldn't hide under the weight of her gaze, couldn’t hold back. He told her… everything. Things he hadn’t thought of for years, things he hadn’t thought he’d ever tell another soul.

It was a thrilling, terrifying kind of exposure. Rellik smirked to himself. That described his sarasha perfectly: thrilling and terrifying.

He told her about growing up in the village and his decision to leave to attend daisheik training at the castle. His fathers had been delighted and proud, but his mother had encouraged him to return to the army. He hadn’t understood her reluctance then, but he did now. Being a pleasure mate had seemed like a dream to a young male who grew up in a small village far from the glittering opulence of the palace.

His mother, however, knew the truth of life there. She’d been a noble at the palace for a time before leaving and assuming the role of leader of their village, so she understood what a daisheik’s life was. She’d wanted more for him.

He told Aria about training, being chosen by the Queen, and the life he led as her favorite pleasure mate. He could see the possessiveness on her face at that, but she didn’t interrupt, just listened as he continued to share his past with her.

His voice dropped to a hushed whisper as he told her about the confrontation with Salesh, how he’d felt cornered and hunted but thought the Queen would protect him from her daughter’s advances. How he’d been more devastated that she hadn’t, when Salesh sold him into slavery, than he had been about being sold.

Rellik couldn’t say how long he spoke about the nightmare his life became as a slave in a pleasure house, about being immune to the Veiling because he’d implanted his own chip which forced him to endure every fucking second fully conscious until he finally snapped and killed someone, but by the time he finished, he felt lighter, steadier, like there had been cracks inside him he hadn’t known were still there and they’d been healed.

He hadn’t realized how much he needed someone to hear his tale without judgement or disgust. Aria listened, truly listened as he spilled his past to her. She didn’t flinch at the ugliness, didn’t condemn him for the things he’d done, or judge him for the choices he’d been forced to make.

Taking a slow breath, he kept going. She already knew this part, about what he’d done to be sent to the gladiator arena then locked in the dungeon where she’d found him, but he told her again anyway.

And then, he kept going. Rellik told her about the first time he saw her, about the longing that grew to obsession as he watched her from afar, about desiring to be hers more than anything but also wondering if he could be that to anyone ever again.

She’d been right to keep him at arm’s length. He knew that, now. He’d needed that time to heal. And she’d been right to stop him earlier. He’d fallen back into old roles without even being aware of it, hadn't even known he’d retreated into himself untilshenoticed and stopped him.

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