Page 21 of Run Free

He sat down on the bench with Alfred and Miriam sprawled out on the grass in front of him. I was surprised to see them in their human form and it took me a moment to realize they were talking. When I heard my name mentioned, I cleared my throat and walked over to sit beside Gage. I didn’t want to just listen in if they were going to talk about me. I probably should have, maybe then I’d have some clue what was going on in Gage’s head since he still wasn’t really talking to me.

“What are you two up to this time?” I laughed, looking down at the two ducks feigning innocence.

“We were just about to place a bet on whether my boy Gage here is going to follow you home like a little puppy dog, or run as fast as he can in the other direction once this is over. Ten to one odds he’s running on you. It’s not looking good for you, sweetheart.”

“Alfred,” Gage warned in a harsh tone.

I turned to face Gage, causing my leg to brush against his and send heat through my body. I tried to hide my gasp of surprise and noted that Gage was far from unaffected by the contact. He shivered, and his pupils dilated. I bit back a grin.

“I’d bet against those odds, if I were you,” I said to Alfred while still staring into Gage’s eyes. I was talking far more confidently than I felt, and quickly grabbed my stuff and fled for my office.

I started pacing my room, unable to believe I had just been so frank in front of Gage. I was used to holding my tongue, especially when it came to my personal feelings about things. I didn’t know what had come over me and I was certain I had embarrassed myself and probably jinxed the entire situation.

It wasn’t long before my door flew open without warning. Gage stood there staring at me with that puzzled look on his face.

“Clara,” he said, causing tingles of sensation to assault my body. “I think we need to talk.”

I knew the conversation wasn’t going to end in my favor, but I had decided to fight for us. Something powerful and demanding washed over me. This was my mate. Mine. I fought for others my entire life, always ignoring my own needs. Not anymore.

I nodded and invited him to sit, though I remained standing and continued to pace.

“Would you sit down, please?” he asked.

I shook my head. “Nervous energy. It’s best I just stand and walk it off.”

“I make you nervous?”

I stopped and stared at him. “No. You don’t make me nervous. The conversation you want to have makes me nervous.”

He sighed. “I don’t want to talk about it either, but we can’t keep dancing around each other like this. I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Oh, but you will,” I said with confidence.

He looked surprised by my answer.

“I’m not an idiot, Gage. I see and hear things. I know you’re struggling to walk away from me and telling yourself it’s just this place and when I’m no longer here, you’ll leave without regret. You are aware that’s not how a bond works, right?”

He cringed at my words. “It’s not like. . .”

I cut him off, with no idea where my words were coming from. “It’s exactly like that. The problem is I don’t know how to break this bond between us. I’ve researched and asked, and everyone says it can be done but no one seems to know how.”

“It’s still new, Clara. We haven’t encouraged it. It’ll go away with distance,” he said sadly.

I thought of Lizzy and my eyes welled up with tears that I couldn’t stop from falling freely. “Everyone thinks I’m so strong, and can handle everything, but I’m not. I’ve seen firsthand what happens to a person with an unresolved bond. I can’t live like that.”

He hesitated, then rose and wrapped me in his arms. My shaky body instantly calmed at his touch. I breathed in his scent and let it relax me even further.

“I’m sorry, angel. You don’t know how badly I wish I could be enough for you. I’m a lone wolf. I have no pack, no status, and nothing but the clothes on my back. That’s no kind of life for you.”

I could feel his pain through our bond and knew he meant it. He was as resolved in leaving me as I was in keeping him. I put my arms around his waist and held on tightly.

“I don’t exactly live a normal pack life, Gage. I’m on the road more than I’m home. I guess in some ways you could say I’m a lone wolf, too,” I confessed, surprised by the truth of it.

Dave barged in without knocking and stopped abruptly. A wide grin spread across his face. “Progress. Finally!”

I shook my head sadly and wiped the last tears from my cheeks, pulling back from Gage’s embrace. “What do you need, Dave?” I asked.

“Oh yeah, that. Thought you’d want to know, the tigers are stirring even on sedation and I don’t think it’s safe to up the dosage further. Wanted to ask what you want to do about it.” Then he turned to address Gage. “And find out from you what the ETA is on their enclosure.”