Page 19 of One True Mate

I had caught Kyle Westin staring at me so many times over our last two years working together. It had never seemed inappropriate or uncomfortable, and I always felt like he had just been waiting for me to do or say something. I shivered, thinking that's exactly what it was. He had known all along and never once alluded to anything. It shouldn't have hurt to think of it, but it did. I couldn't explain the stabbing pain in my heart when I thought about it. It felt like betrayal, yet I trusted him and believed what he said was true. I still didn't see how I could have been born a shifter and my parents never mentioned a word of it. They had to have known. Why wouldn't they have told me?

He was staring at me again. Waiting. Letting me sort through my thoughts and questions in my own time. I was grateful to him for it and as I thought about it, as I looked at him, a surge of something brushed through me. It felt like my wolf, but not like she was fighting for control or to get out. I had this uncontrollable urge to just reach out and touch him.

I know he saw my eyes go wide with shock. He gave me a slight little smirk of a grin like he knew exactly what I was thinking. I felt the urge brush through me again, and before I realized it, I had scooted closer to him. So, close. Our bodies brushed up against each other and my hand was out and headed for what? Him? His face? His body? I licked my lips at the thought just as it all came slamming into me.

What the hell was I doing? I jerked my hand back and made a move to scoot back, shocked and embarrassed at my actions. It had been like I was in a trance and couldn't control myself from reaching out to him for comfort.

He gave a small chuckle and reached out and grabbed my hand. He laid it against his cheek, and the slight stubble of the day's growth tickled my palm in a delicious way that I loved. I couldn't stop myself from stroking his cheek even while his large hand covered mine, holding it against him. And he looked. happy? It was as if my entire body relaxed into a puddle of goo at his touch and he looked as if he was having the same affect from mine.

“It's okay, babe, wolves crave touch and closeness. It is perfectly normal. Don't ever feel afraid to reach out and touch me. It will calm your wolf, as it does mine. Did you feel a peace wash over you at my touch?”

Oh, I felt something wash over me, but I'm not quite sure it was exactly peace. My heart was already racing just at his closeness, now I thought it may just jump out of my chest. But there was something searching in his eyes, like he needed me to confirm this for him. I nodded, even knowing I couldn't control the blush that was no doubt turning my face into a blotchy mess.

He let out a small breath I hadn't realized he was holding and smiled so big it was contagious, and I found myself returning it.

“Come here,” he said. Not demanding, not quite asking, but I still got the feeling he was treading in new territory here too.

I gave a small yelp in surprise as he reached out and wrapped his arms around me and pulled me onto his lap cradling me like a small child.

My wolf stirred in excitement, though she made no attempt to take control. I could not remember ever feeling so content. Both my wolf and I were at complete peace, and my entire body calmed. Even my racing heart stilled as I soaked up the warmth surrounding me in Kyle Westin's embrace. I laid my head on his shoulder and turned towards his neck. Without realizing what I was doing, I took a deep breath, letting his scent envelope me. It was a scent I knew well, but there was something different about it this time, something I couldn't quite place. I felt him shudder lightly around me.

He turned and kissed the top of my head. My first instinct was to jolt and get away from him quickly, but I couldn't physically make myself do it. Instead, it was like this dam that had been holding back my deepest emotions for most of my life cracked, and with that small crack, everything broke free.

I was crying, borderline hysterical, the big ugly, full body sobbing cries. I should have been humiliated to do that in front of him, but I wasn't, and I couldn't have stopped it if I tried. He just held me, slightly rocking in a soothing pattern and telling me over and over that he was there and everything was going to be fine now, that he would never let anything bad happen to me again. No one had ever comforted me in a such a way outside of my parents, and I craved it.

At some point, he must have lulled me to sleep because the next thing I knew I woke up and couldn't remember where I was or what I was doing. I was in the in the most amazing cocoon imaginable. I felt safer than I'd ever felt in my entire life. I knew I was in my den before I even opened my eyes because I could smell my usual scents, but they were accompanied by a new smell. A masculine scent of pine and lemon that just smelled refreshingly like home combined with my usual den smells. I stretched and the palm of my hand rubbed against something firm, but comfortably inviting. A soft moan escaped as I turned and snuggled in closer. I sighed contentedly, opening my senses, surprised to hear a soft mumbling noise I couldn't quite place. With some concentration, the sound morphed into voices, and the hair on my body, even in human form, stood up.

“Shhh, you're waking her. Go away.” A muffled rumble came much too close to my ear.

Suddenly, everything from the day came crashing back in on me. I jerked and sat up quickly. I moved fast, real fast, imagining they saw little more than a blur as I retreated into my favorite hidey hole in the den. I sniffed the air in alert confusion, and let out a low growl when I smelled intruding females in my territory.

“Oh my gosh! Did you see that?”

“No, where did she go?”

“I don't know. I've never seen someone move so quickly, especially in human form.”

Human form, I thought? Oh right. I recognized the voices. Lily and Elise. My heart rate sped up in a panic before I remembered they knew now and they were all in on it too. The pain of that betrayal hit me like a ton of bricks.

“Back off, and get back upstairs. I told you she wasn't comfortable with you girls in her den.”

“We're her friends, Kyle. You're an alpha, you're a bigger threat to her than we are.”

“It's not like that. You know she-wolves are very territorial. You two couldn't even share a bedroom once you both came of age, and you're sisters.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Lily said, “But really, I'm worried about her, Kyle. Where did she go?”

I sighed as I crawled out on all fours, but still fully dressed and in human form.

“I'm here. I'm okay. Sorry. I think I dozed off and was just confused waking up with new scents and voices here. Just got spooked. I'm sorry.”

I couldn't help feeling ashamed at how I'd reacted. Kyle made a move towards me but I held up my hands.

“Please, just give me a minute.”

The hurt evident on his face at my words and actions felt like physical pain to me. It made no sense and my head was spinning as my new reality sunk in.

Taking a deep, cleansing breath, I nodded to him. “Okay, I'm okay now.”