Page 46 of Wolf Tamer

“But because I started to back away from going to the coven meetings before then, they almost seemed to come around only to get a good look at me and see how I held up. Or to convince Carmen that she needed to attend more and find her purpose through them.” I huffed out a tight laugh. “I was kind of a lost cause already.”

I stare out into the expanse of forest around us as Reid’s arms tighten around me further. He stretches out a finger to trail along the exposed line of my back.

Our time, I think with more than my fair share of wonder.

When have we ever gotten time together to just be? To learn each other the way we deserve to be learned?

“I renounced them, and it seemed the most natural thing in the world to do,” I continue. “Why be a part of a group that isn’t there when you need them to be? Or who only comes around because they’re curious? That’s not how a coven is supposed to be. Blood sisters, blood brothers, those who will step in when needed at any time. Not when it suits them and not for an ulterior motive.”

“I can understand,” Reid responds with a nod.

“Doubtful.”

He takes his time before speaking, considering how to proceed. For a moment, I tense, wondering if he’ll offer the same honesty I just offered him.

Only a part of me, a small part I’m not used to listening to, knows better than to worry.

“My father was always big on the ceremony part,” Reid admits softly. “On lording his position over the others like it was some kind of blood rite of his that made him better than anyone else. Made him the best ruler possible rather than the one who was willing to bloody himself for the title. It was all about glory for him. When you told me that witches were disappearing, more than the one who willingly sacrificed herself for us, I didn’t even stop to think or try to dispute you. It just made sense. It made sense for him to be the one to take more than he’d been given, because that was his personality.”

“He sounds like a real winner.” I burrow my face against Reid, inhaling deeply and lavishing in the waves of heat rising off his skin. “I’ve never met the man, but I’ve heard shit. Nothing good.”

“From what you’ve told me, your parents loved you. They might have been more preoccupied with each other, but they still made time for you.”

It is more of a question than a statement, and so I voice a hum of agreement. “Yes. I know that, if I needed anything, they would come running. But I had to ask. They were never the type to just be there. I always sought them out.”

Except now, I feel guilty because it sounds selfish to complain about something so small. Small and pivotal. A dynamic that shaped me into the woman I am today.

And I know without a doubt that Reid’s story is the opposite end of the spectrum.

“My father beat us. All three of his boys and his wife, if we took the smallest step out of line.” Oddly enough, his voice holds no animosity. “Father told us it was for our own good, to make us strong, to show us how to be the best versions of ourselves, which somehow only he knew what they should be.”

“I’m surprised you never beat him back. I’m not sure what I would have done if someone decided to get heavy-handed with me,” I admit, and partially to remind him of the welts that have now healed on my body sincehe’dgotten heavy-handed.

Reid shakes his head, curving slightly toward me so that his breath tickles the top of my head. “The man cheated, he gaslit anyone he spoke to, and he could convince a blind man that he, my father, was the only way to get them to see again. He had a way of charming the pants off anyone, and it took me years to realize it was a classic narcissistic personality.”

I understand the type. I’ve come across those same toxic people more often than not in my trade. Not all of my marks are bad people, and sometimes I’m employed on a job simply to retrieve an item that has been stolen from the one who hired me. Yet, more often than not, the target boasts the same traits as Edmund: the smarmy cocksuckers who want power and control. Attention and admiration. The ones who gather people beneath them to feed their need for those things until everyone else is used dry.

I’ve killed them.

Somehow, Edmund escaped my justice and wrath before I had a chance to slit his throat. Too bad.

“How did you survive?” I ask Reid instead.

He doesn’t need my ire right now, on top of everything else. And I genuinely want to know how he managed to come out on the other side of such traumatic abuse, physical and emotional.

How does someone come out of such a situation unscathed?

Reid shrugs, the movement causing me to nearly bounce against him. He chuckles at my indignant squawk. “I did the best I could to blend in, and I learned how to walk on eggshells. I vowed every night that I wouldn’t be my father, that I’d try to be the best version of myself, even if that wasn’t the version he thought was best.”

“You’re a better man than he is.”

“Oh, you see thatnow, do you?” he added with a small laugh. “I try. Fuck, do I try. It’s hard and there are some days when I’m absolutely terrified to make a decision because I know the right one is one that he would suggest. It makes me just like him.”

“It really doesn’t.” But I know how he feels. It’s why I’ve managed to avoid any serious relationships in the past.

And I know what he’s saying, even when he doesn’t speak. That my insinuation that he’s anything like his father is more than just an insult or a slap to the face.

Although, to be fair, what sane man would logically want to get involved with a woman who kills people for a living? There aren’t a lot of psychopaths out there willing to take on a person like me.

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