Page 40 of Eternally Yours

I swallowed hard. “We’ll part ways. I’m going to try to lead the Order as far away from you as possible.”

“And your father?”

“I’ll need to convince him that you’re not a threat. That even though I sired you, we didn’t become bloodmated.”

She crossed her arms, her brows knitting together. “Maybe you should just leave me now. Save your time. I don’t want to put your life at risk. It’ll be better for both of us.”

My insides twisted as I fought with my desire to hold her in my arms and comfort her. To let her know nothing mattered more to me than keeping her safe. And not because of some chivalrous duty, or because of compulsion birthed from our bond. But because of everything I couldn’t tell her. Because I was a coward. Too afraid to face my family. To stand up for my beliefs. Too afraid to let myself love someone again. It was easier this way. Less painful for both of us.

“Loren,” I said, “I’m not leaving you until I know you’re safe.”

She hesitated.

“There’s no negotiating.”

Pursing her lips, she tunneled her fierce gaze into mine. She’d never know it, but in that instant, I wanted to kiss her harder than I’d ever kissed another woman. I wanted to pick her up and fling her on her bed and ravage that pretty mouth of hers until it was raw. Until we couldn’t tell where she ended, and I began.

“Nic,” she started, but then she stopped and glanced at the floor. She bit her bottom lip, struggling with her thoughts it seemed.

Elizabeth’s face flashed before my eyes, reminding me of the promise I’d once made to her. To myself. I would never let love blind me from doing the right thing ever again. As much as it shredded me up inside, not sealing the bond was the right choice.

“We still have a few hours left of daylight. Try to catch some more sleep. We go hunting at dusk.” Walking away from her, I felt the sharp stare of her eyes on my back. I knew she was hurting, but one day she would thank me for not sending everything to hell and making love to her right then and there.

Chapter Fourteen

Loren

Iawoke with a jolt. Haunted by another fucking wet dream. This time, Nic and I had finished what we’d started on the couch, and it’d been so hot. I didn’t know how my own mind could have conjured up something like that. I was sweating, my heart drumming against my ribs, but I couldn’t disturb Nic again only to be rejected and embarrassed like before.

I glanced at the watch he’d given me and groaned as the numbers 8:15 PM stared back at me. I rolled out of bed and gently padded out into the bathroom. After washing my face, I stared at the small window next to the shower stall and crazy thoughts went through my head.

What if I left? Maybe I could find a way to exist on my own. To teach myself to hunt or procure my own blood bags. But where would I go, really? I had no money. No phone. As much as he’d have me believe I wasn’t a prisoner, that’s exactly what I was.

And even if I had the resources to escape and live on my own, Nic would find me through the stupid bond. It was like a GPS, he’d said. I couldn’t stand it. I’d been so independent my whole life that being trapped in this new body, in this cabin, and even being trapped in the shadows by the goddamn sun peeved me to no end.

I hated having to depend on a man to keep me safe. As if I couldn’t defend myself. As if I couldn’t make my own decisions about what I wanted for my life. Fact was, I was pretty fucking terrifying as a vampire, or whatever the hell I was. Between him and I, who was truly in danger here? Sure, he’d pulled me out of that wreck, but who’s to say I wouldn’t have been able to get myself out of that predicament on my own?

No. I was done playing by his rules. I’d lost my humanity, but I hadn’t lost Loren. I just needed to find a way back to myself.

With my mind made up, I peeked between the dividers of the blinds covering the small window. I wanted to see if there was a way to climb out, but I didn’t expect the sun to still be hovering just above the horizon, the last of its light pushing through the trees. I jumped back, pressing my back against the wall, my chest heaving in anticipation of the burn.

I reached up to touch my face, expecting my skin to be sizzling or for my eyes to have been charred, but I wasn’t in pain and I could still see. So, what happened?

Perhaps there hadn’t been enough sunlight?

As my breath settled down, I took a moment to delight in what I’d just seen. Since learning of my transformation, I’d tried not to think about the fact that the sun had been stolen from me along with everything else. That for all of eternity, I’d never be able to feel its warmth on my skin or relish in the beauty of a sunset or sunrise.

Life had granted me a parting gift, and I was eternally grateful.

My watch vibrated, knocking me out of my thoughts. Well, I guess that meant the sun had fully set and it was safe to peek back out.

Beyond the woods and not too far off in the distance, I saw the silvery reflection of a lake. The moon and the stars were on full display and they beckoned me to join them outside. I didn’t have long before Nic would wake up, wanting to start training me, so if I was gonna break out, now was the time.

Prying the window open, I pulled myself through and felt instant relief the moment my bare feet hit the grassy ground. Freedom never felt so great.

My jailer would probably tear out of his skin if he found out I’d disobeyed his orders of never venturing out in the woods alone. Well, guess what? I wasn’t a child. And skinny dipping in a lake that was mere yards away was hardly breaking the rules. And if he found me, so be it. I was tired of being inside that cabin with him.

Iwas going for a swim. Plus, I kept the watch on, so I wasn’t being too rebellious.