Page 28 of Praying Mantis

“Sorry about that. Are we ready to go?” She smiles, but it doesn’t reach her eyes. Something is wrong and my mom knows it too. She’s eyeing Louisa with concern as her eyebrows pinch together. My mom nods and I hold out an arm for her. Louisa walks behind us and all I want to do is wrap my arms around her while making her talk to me. Maybe I can fuck it out of her? I smirk.

“What’s that look for?” Louisa stares at me with her arms crossed against her chest.

“Nothing.” I smile. “Have I told you how beautiful you look today and thank you for being here with Mom and me?” I lean down and kiss her lips.

“You don’t have to thank me. There is no place I’d rather be.” She places her perfectly manicured hand on my chest. “And no you didn’t tell me I look beautiful but thank you.” She smiles at me, then slides into the limo.

The service is nice and there is a large crowd, some who knew my dad well and others coming to see if he really is dead. I hear whispers asking if Colin was now in charge, while others come to me to set up meetings. With Mom next to me, I can’t tell them no or to go see Colin. My eyes search for Louisa many times, and she has been sitting with Matthew the whole time. I had one man stand guard near her without hovering. I can be here for Mom knowing Louisa was safe and protected.

After the funeral, we head to O’Reilly’s Pub for the traditional Irish send off. It’s mainly my dad’s men here telling stories of him. They’re more of the same of how he was a hardass, but when it came to my mom, though he was the biggest teddy bear. I’m sitting at the bar with my pint of Guinness sipping on it when I feel someone coming to stand next to me.

“Sean,” Finn says my name in his heavy Irish accent. We grew up together, went to school and he was running errands for my dad by the time he was fifteen. He knew this was the life for him and I supported him wholeheartedly.

“Hey, man. Where have you been?”

“Back home in Ireland with the folks. I took the first flight out when I heard the news.”

“How are the folks?” He sits down and salutes the bartender pointing to my drink.

“Good. They’re hoping to visit soon. I think Mrs. O will enjoy it, don’t you?” I nod. “Colin is up to something. He’s plotting and I’m on the outside because we are friends.” I sigh. “I’m not asking the question everyone else has been but if you’re going to take over the mantle, then we need to take him out.” I nod.

“I need to talk to Máthair and Louisa before I make an announcement but are you willing to lead alongside me if I need you?” If I take over and leave the FBI for good, I’m going to need men I trust leading with me.

“We’ve been friends since first grade. I was there when you left for the military, and joined the FBI. I’ve had your back since the beginning and I’ll have it until I breathe my last.” He places his hand on my shoulder. “Sean, no bullshit. You need to be in one hundred percent not half in half out. These men will follow you but you will need to earn their trust.”

“Don’t I know it and I’m going to have to drop bodies to prove it.” He nods. There’s laughter coming from the corner which breaks our eye contact and it’s Louisa and my mom talking to some guys. I smile at her. She fits into this world more than my FBI life because of her past. Would she stay with me if I gave this all up?

Louisa

Cara needed this time with these guys. They’re making her laugh and cry with these stories.

“Do you think Sean will order me a car to take me home?” Cara leans into me. “I’m so tired right now.”

“I’m sure he would. I’ll go back with you. I’m struggling to stay awake.” I squeeze her hand. She nods. I stand and walk over to Sean.

“Hey, baby. This is my best friend, Finn. We grew up together.” Sean introduces me to the red-headed male next to him.

“So I need to talk to you about this guy. I need some dirt on him.” I smile up and Sean is shaking his head. “Your mom and I are ready to go home. I know you might want to come with us, but you should stay.” I’m hoping he forgets we need to talk. I’m shaking on the inside and trying to remain calm on the outside.

“I’ll get the driver to take you guys home. You’re okay with me staying?” He pulls me closer to him. He opens his legs for me. I wrap my arms around his neck. He peppers my neck with kisses.

“I’m okay with you staying. It’s good for you. I’m tired and I think your mom needs some time to herself. These stories have been good for her but she needs to be with your dad in private at the house.” He nods, understanding me. “Stay as late as you want. I’ll take care of Cara.” I kiss his lips and I moan into his lips as he deepens the kiss. We break apart and I smile at him.

“Wake me when you get home.” I wink before breaking from his embrace. “Finn, it was nice meeting you and I hope I’ll see you around more. Keep him out of trouble for me.” Finn smiles and tells me he makes no promises.

Cara is quiet in the SUV and I don’t push her to talk. I just squeeze her hand letting her know I’m here. We walk into the house and her shoulders sag.

“Today made it all real. I really thought he’d show up and tell me it was all a joke.” She lets out a sob and I pull her into me. I rub her back as she cries over the loss of her husband, her future with him, and the uncertainty of it all. I know she wants Sean to take over but I don’t think he will. He loves being an agent. His eyes light up when he talks about work. “I’m so sorry.” Cara whispers.

“Don’t apologize for crying or missing your husband. I’m here if you ever need me.” I smooth her hair and we walk into the living room arm in arm. “Would you like tea or something to eat?”

“No dear. I think I want to grab a book, get lost in another world, and sleep.” I nod. She walks up the stairs one at a time and with each step my heart shatters knowing there’s not much I can do to help her take away her grief. I decide to take a bath before crawling into the bed to sleep. I toss and turn not sleeping well because all I can do is think about that email. I grab my phone to send a text.

ME: I need to speak with you ASAP

I never sent a reply back confirming the hit. I stare at the phone waiting for some sort of response. My eyes drift close and I’m clutching the phone. I don’t know how long I’ve been asleep when I feel the bed dip on Sean’s side. I open my eyes and see the back of him as he struggles to take off his shirt.

“Do you need help undressing?” I ask trying to wake up enough to help him.

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