Page 11 of Love in Design

“I needed to come out here to cool down before I said something that would ruin our night together. You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met. Those women who throw themselves at me could never hold a candle to you. I want you, and I’ve made myself clear. Do I need to take a billboard out for you to get it? I’m not trying to be an ass, but what do I need to do?” I open my mouth to say something, but he steps forward, kissing me. It isn’t a quick kiss either. It’s a panty-melting, longing desire filled kiss. Breaking apart, “I need some air.”

He walks out of the movie theatre altogether, leaving me there by myself.

“What have I done?” I sigh.

I decide to walk out to find him. He’s on the phone, and I don’t want to interrupt him, but he says my name.

“Bethani, how am I supposed to get it through Laura’s thick skull that I like her and want to get to know her. I mean, I didn’t even feel this for Catherine.” I’ve heard that name, wasn’t that Victoria’s mom’s name? “How do I show her, though? I’m taking her out on our first date, complimenting her, constantly touching her. Ask her what? What her love language is? What the fuck is a love language?” He hangs up the phone, and I’m leaning against the wall.

“Love language is how you express your feelings toward someone. Some prefer gifts, quality time, physical touch, words of admiration, and so on. I didn’t mean to overhear your conversation.”

“It’s okay. If I wanted it to be private, I would’ve waited to call Bethani.” Nate kicks the snow around at his feet.

“I don’t know why I’m like this, but I don’t have a lot of experience with guys. I dated a couple of guys in college, but they didn’t go anywhere past six months. I hate that I’m so insecure about you.”

“I will do what you need me to do, but,” Nate takes a deep sigh, “but you need to understand I’m not going anywhere. I’ll go at your speed. But, I’m not introducing you to Victoria as my girlfriend until I know you’re secure with us.”

“I can accept those terms.” We leave the theatre halfway through the movie and decide to take dinner to return to his place. We eat pizza and watch some Harry Potter. It’s an excellent way to end the evening. He walks me home, holding my hand. I can’t stop the smile on my face. He kisses me good night and waits until I’m in my house with the porch light off before walking away.

“How was it?” Amy puts the book down that she’s reading. I explain everything. “He sounds like a great guy. Why are you so afraid to let him in?”

I sigh. “I’m afraid of being alone. What happens if I fall in love with him and one day, poof, it’s gone.”

“What happens if you fall in love and have a family? Stop living with the what-ifs.”

“Why am I like this?” I flop onto my couch.

“Do you want the truth?” I sit up on my elbows to stare at her for her to continue. “Your mom, I loved her like mine own too, kept you so sheltered that even when you had a guy at college, you were too afraid to let go and be in the moment. You’ve always been so reserved, afraid to live for fear of disappointing your mom. I love you, but enough is enough.” I blink away the tears stinging my eyes.

“I never knew you felt like that. Why tell me now?”

“Because I see you letting a good guy jump through hoops when you want him just as much as he wants you. Be all in.”

“What would I do without you? I’m going to hate when you leave.”

“About that,” now it’s Amy’s turn to cry, “I’m moving home. We decided to separate for a little bit. I’m going to talk to Nate tomorrow about working for him. I don’t want to talk about it yet. We took each other for granted, and now maybe we can appreciate what we have now.” I let her talk, and I hope it’s the case. I smile at her. “This is good for the two of us.”

“I have an extra bedroom that is all yours.”

“Oh, thank you! I couldn’t move back in with my parents.” We embrace and drink some wine, talking about everything but Nate, Amy’s husband, and my mom.

Is she right, though?

Chapter Thirteen

NATE

Victoria woke up with a low-grade fever Sunday morning when Lily brought her home. She’s resting now. I called Mikey, the studio manager, to ask if he can cover for me. Laura texts me to let me know about Amy wanting to learn how to tattoo. I think it’s a great idea but apologize it can’t be today.

Victoria slept about three hours before coming out to lay with me on my recliner to watch Harry Potter. This kid would rather watch those movies than Disney, which I’m thankful for, but she’s still into them because she wants a Beauty and the Beast theme for her birthday this year. I called Bethani, and she jumped on it to start planning. I’ll watch the movie at some point to know what my daughter wants.

“Daddy, I’m thirsty.”

“Apple juice?” She nods. I lift her off my lap, placing her ever so gently back on the chair to head into the kitchen. There’s a knock at the door. Looking out the peephole, Laura stands there. “Hi.” I smile while opening the door.

“I heard you have a sick little one on your hands, so I brought some of my mom’s homemade chicken noodle soup, apple juice, and popsicles.” Victoria comes to the kitchen as I take everything out of her hands.

“Miss Laura.” She wraps her arms around her waist. “What are you doing here?”

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