Page 85 of Save Room for Us

“Not how much.” He shook his head. “You know what I want.”

“I’m not fucking you, Grady.”

“Then you not gon’ get it, and you not gon’ get Asif back.” He shrugged, smiling in a cunning fashion.

“Guess not.” I turned around and kept walking, feeling Grady’s eyes on me as I retrieved my phone from my purse.

Me: Hey, B, I’m down. Will let you know the details soon.

“Good night, Milan!” Grady yelled to my back, but I kept it going.

FEW DAYS LATER…

“Whoa, fast, Mommy!”Sophie screeched, holding onto the sides of the Target basket as I pushed us through. I came early, soon as they opened, and on a weekday, so I could grab everything I needed with minimal stares and interactions.

“I know.” I smiled, liking that she found my anxiety fun.

The past week had been very busy, between being a mother, Asif’s crew having a heavy need of medical attention—whether it was from card games gone wrong or an attempted robbery on the corner—so I was working overtime.

On top of that, I was still doing trial preparation with Bashar. I hated it, but I knew he was right and only doing what he needed to be sure we won this and I went home. Add to thatthe nightmares I was still having, plus worrying every morning I woke up that so would Cedric, and I was exhausted.

I quickly got everything I needed for the week, as well as what was on my mother’s list, then made my way to the self-checkout. I wanted to avoid all people, including the ones who worked here.

“Are you the woman from the news?” I heard a high voice inquire as I scanned the items like a madwoman.

Moving the few unruly tendrils from my face as I stood upright, I took the stubby black woman in before nodding. “I am.”

As she made her way toward me, I blew out a breath of frustration, not in the mood for her think piece on why she felt like I was lying or her thoughts period. These people were trying me every time I stepped out, making it harder and harder to behave as if I had some decorum.

“I just wanted to let you know that my husband and I are praying for you and hoping you get acquitted of the charges, even if it changes to murder. I believe all the stuff you said, and those pictures,” she exhaled and shook her head, “were rough to look at.”

“Oh… thank you.” She’d surprised me with her stance, making me give her eye contact and stop scanning hurriedly.

“My daughter was umm, with an abusive man, but she took too long to do something about it. We buried her two years ago.”

“I’m so sorry to hear that. Oh my gosh.” I didn’t know what to say to this woman and felt saddened to hear it.

“Yeah, me too, sweetie.” A small smile appeared before she said, “I know it’s wrong to say, but I thank you for doing what you did. I think if my daughter saw someone like you, she might’ve done the same thing. You may not believe it or know it, but you gave courage to a lot of women and have scared the shit out of some of these abusive assholes.”

We chortled a bit, and Sophie joined like she always did when people laughed, despite not understanding. As smart as she was, though, maybe she did comprehend.

“I sure hope so.” I giggled, wiping my damp eyes quickly.

She opened her arms for a hug, and I hesitated but eventually embraced her. We said some parting words before I finished checking out and left the store.

That easily, I was feeling a little better. It didn’t even cross my mind that what I did could encourage some until the woman said it. Had I seen someone like me on the news a while ago, I just might’ve gotten the courage to do the shit sooner.

I made it home about fifteen minutes later and gave Sophie a snack before I tried to tidy up my mama’s home. She said she didn’t mind, but she hadn’t had a toddler in her house for decades, and Sophie was like a tornado. I already felt like a burden on her, so seeing Sophie make such a mess, and me going out with Asif occasionally, had me feeling quite guilty.

“Ahhhh! A monster!” Sophie screeched, jumping in front of the vacuum I’d turned on, wanting me to chase her.

I knew right then I wouldn’t be able to clean much.

As I shut it off, feeling defeated, my phone rang, and I saw it was Asif. I couldn’t help but to notice the smile form on my face and the giddiness within my belly.

“Hi.” I sat down on the couch as Sophie inspected the vacuum, not realizing I’d just turned it off.

“You aight? I ain’t like that greeting.” His deep voice flowed through the phone, making me feel things.

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