Page 127 of Save Room for Us

“Where the fuck you been?” I got right to it, not in the mood for all this other shit she was talking about.

“Well…” she paused when the waitress returned with the drinks and the appetizer, then continued when she pranced off, “since I’ve been out of the ward, I’ve gotten married, and I have a daughter.” She grinned, unlocking her phone in search of a picture.

I was too floored to even take in the photo when she flipped the phone around to show me.

“A biological daughter?” I quizzed.

“Yep. Blaire. She’s six years old now. Time flies.” She blushed before putting her martini glass to her lips.

I chuckled a bit, taking a sip of my own whiskey. My intention coming in this bitch today was to remain cordial and keep shit cool, but I couldn’t. Not after knowing she ran off and created a whole new fucking family without even sending a message through pigeon to a nigga.

Opening my mouth, I froze for a beat, then said, “How the fuck you have a new kid and husband and ain’t said shit to me this whole time? You treat Blaire the same way you treated me?”

Gulping more of her alcohol, she replied, “I didn’t reach out to you, Asif, because honestly, I was embarrassed of the way I treated you when you were a child. I was a terrible mother, and I figured you were better off and didn’t want anything to do with me. You had a great father, and I knew Lisara had been a better mother to you than I could’ve ever been.

“But then,” she ran her finger along the rim of the glass, “I couldn’t stand it any longer.”

“Oh, after seven fucking years, huh?” I laughed.

“Seems long, but it really wasn’t. Time flew, like I said, but every day was unbearable, and I always thought about you. So Brian, my husband, told me to just reach out. He said I would regret it if I didn’t try, so I did. I saw you were now working for the bank, and I used it as a way to reach out to you because you don’t answer social media messages.”

“Aight, so what you want from me?” I sat back, eyeing her over the waitress’s arms since she was now here setting down the steaming hot food.

“A relationship, Asif. I know you have Lisara, assuming Chianti is still with her…”

“He is.”

“Right. So I don’t want to infringe upon that, but I do want something with you. Yes, she has done a lot for you and been there for you, but I am your mother. I carried you, I birthed you, and you havemyDNA. So I want you around. I’d like you to meet Blaire and Brian… and for us just to have something but much better than what we used to have.” She began slicing her steak.

“Why the fuck were you like that when I was coming up?” I wasn’t really in the mood for the burger I’d ordered.

She kept quiet for a bit, slicing her meat up but then exhaled heavily and said, “To be honest, baby, I never wanted to be a mother. I got pregnant under the advice of your grandmother,whom you’re too young to remember, and kept you because she told me to as well.”

“To keep my pops.”

“Yes.” She peered up from her plate momentarily but then promptly shifted her eyes back down. “It worked. He was so happy because he knew he couldn’t have any more children, and he seemed to be so elated and happy with me for having gotten pregnant. So as time went on, I washappy, too, but then you were born, and Chianti was better, so he got right back to working odd hours. I was with you all day, and babies are not easy, but they’re especially difficult when you have them for any other reason than because you wanted to. But it kept Chianti, so I was fine for the most part.

“Then as you started to get older, Chianti began pulling away from me, always complaining about the type of mother I was and the type of girlfriend I was, and I began to despise you. You were supposed to be this thing that solidified me in his life and made everything okay, but you weren’t. I could tell Chianti would still leave me, and now, even worse, I had you. So I took my frustrations out on you, and then when he… he met Lisara,” she cleared her throat like it took everything to say her name, “I just completely lost control and was spiraling. It made me hate you even more.”

I wanted to gut her ass, but at least she was keeping shit real.

“No wonder you tried to have her killed.” I shook my head, sitting back in my chair after eating one measly ass fry.

“Um… yeah, I guess you could say that.”

I could tell she was surprised I knew that tidbit. Only reason I did was because we all wanted to know what happened to Lisara’s cousin Sarika that she often mentioned and had dedications to in her shops.

“You know her cousin, who had nothing to do with shit, died instead, right?”

“I do.” She nodded. “I was a different person back then, Asif. I didn’t have a life outside of Chianti, and she was taking everything from me.” She reached across to touch my hand, but I moved it, making her take pause before speaking. “You saved my life, though, because had I not been your mother, your father would’ve killed me for what we did.”

“We?”

“My best friend, Tangie. Maybe you don’t remember her.”

“Vaguely,” I responded.

“She wasn’t as lucky as me.” She started to eat some of her food as I sipped on my drink that wasn’t even strong enough at the moment. “How is your life now? You have kids? A wife? A girlfriend?” She beamed.

---