“Let me see.” I reached my hand out, and he handed it over, eating a piece of his steak as I swiped through the photos.
Just as I was about to hand it back, a text message from Milan popped up, and I could see to the right of the notification a small photo of what looked like pregnancy tests.
“You don’t like ’em?” Asif asked, noticing I was frozen, even after the notification disappeared.
“They’re fine. Just send them to me when you check your messages.” I slid the phone back.
Asif took it, keeping his eyes on me after my strange statement as he moved around on his phone. I kept my focus on my plate, however, not knowing what to think about what I’d seen. Finally, his eyes landed on his phone screen, and as his irises moved back and forth, I knew he was reading her message.
“Anastazia—”
“I want a to-go box. I’m full.” I cut him off. I felt sick and upset and wasn’t trying to react here in public.
Not protesting, Asif got the waiter’s attention, asking him for the bill and to pack our food up. While we waited, I kept my eyesout of the window, not wanting to look at him because I knew I would react.
The waiter finally came back with the bill, and while Asif peeled off cash to pay for it, he boxed our food up for us.
“Give me ya fucking hand, love,” Asif stated sternly when I moved from his attempt to hold my hand. Intertwining our fingers, he tugged me closer and bent down to whisper, “I get you mad, but you not gon’ be walking off all far where I can’t fucking see you. Even when you mean as fuck, I still love you, and I’ll turn Vegas the fuck out if some shit happen to you.”
Like a pissed off child just reprimanded by their mother, I pouted as we walked together hand in hand to the elevator. Once inside and the doors were closed, I tried to remove my fingers, but he wouldn’t let me, not until we were inside the suite.
I walked to the large, comfy couch to remove these Tom Ford heels as Asif set the food down in the fridge before coming over to me.
“I don’t even know if I want an explanation,” I said as he sat on the coffee table to be right across from me yet close.
“So you’d rather us just not talk about the shit and go on like ain’t nothing happen? I’m cool with that too. Either way, this incident ends with us still being together, baby.”
“Oh, it does? You think I like you that much?” I laughed mirthlessly.
“Nah, I think you love me, and you love a nigga because you know I wouldn’t bullshit you, and I mean well.” He stared at me with his fine ass, and I just sucked my teeth. “Also, you smart enough and mature enough not to write me off over a fucking text message with no context.”
“Okay, so go.” I folded my arms, irritated every time I looked into his beautiful eyes. He was too handsome, and I loved him too much. His prevalent cologne was even doing something to me right now.
Chuckling at my anger, which only bothered me, he said, “Look at me.” When I did, he continued. “She came to me saying she was pregnant a little bit ago, and I ain’t say nothing because I don’t believe her. I didn’t believe her then, but especially not now when it took her fuckingweeksto send a simple pregnancy test. I also ain’t say shit because I know Milan; she dramatic and embellishes on shit when she hurt. Not to mention, I have never once raw dogged that girl.”
I couldn’t help but to notice how calm he was in spite of the circumstances and even with me having an attitude. In fact, he was always like this with me, ready and willing to explain with a cool head. No matter how rude I was, Asif wouldn’t take the bait. I liked it.
I’d gotten so used to dealing with a man who yelled and flew off the handle constantly that I’d forgotten how real men reacted. I couldn’t pinpoint a time my father had ever raised his voice at my mother, even when she raised hers, and Cedric made me forget that, that was the type of man I wanted.
“Using a condom doesn’t mean it’s not yours,” I said, calming down some, especially with the time lapse between him asking for a test and her sending it. That was weird, but still didn’t mean it wasn’t his.
“Which is why I asked for a test that she’s just now sending.”
“So what now?”
“Now, I’m gon’ take her to one of my doctors so they can test her ass as well. If it comes out positive, I’m gon’ try to book a DNA test so I can know up front. I ain’t dealing with bullshit and shenanigans for nine months just to find out the little muthafucka ain’t mine.”
Glancing out the window into the dark city illuminated by lights, I asked, “When did you stop fucking her?”
“When you asked me to, baby. I would never fuck y’all both at the same time. I’m trying to build with you, baby, be yo’ nigga forlife, and I can’t build shit on lies and distrust. I got trust issues myself, so I don’t ever wanna put the woman I love in a position to not take what I say as law.”
“Fuck.” I groaned, digging into my eyes with my palms in angst. “I hate that I believe everything you say,” I admitted, feeling myself tear up.
I felt weak, and I guess it was because this dynamic was new for me. I’d never been with a man who had me feeling like this for him. I was usually always the one with the upper hand emotionally, able to leave his ass at any minute and not feel a thing, but not with Asif. I felt like if we parted ways, I would be physically ill.
And I was having a hard time deciphering if I believed him because I trusted him or if I believed him because I wanted to. I didn’t like that he could tell me anything, and it would sound true.
“You gotta trust me, baby.” He came to sit next to me. “You smart, and not just with book shit, so if you believe a nigga, it’s because you know what I’m saying is real shit.”