Page 28 of Corrupted Guilt

Know it because that’s what he does.

Knows things about me.

Also …

Iwantto obey him.

Blech!

I can’t believe it, I don’t want to believe it, but it’s true.

I want to please him.

I want to trust that he knows what he’s doing with me.

I’m still frustrated as hell, so I’ll take a shower a little colder than usual.

Alotcolder. Maybe my throbbing body will cool down.

I glimpse in the mirror the ugly, carmine-colored bruises on my back and remember how they got there.

I shiver and try to get that out of my head. I replaced it with Yuri helping me in the bath. Standing over me the entire time, his eyes raking up and down my body, his hands on my shoulders, gently shampooing my hair.

I soak, think, and wonder how he’s going to remind me of what I did. I initiated the sex last night.

Initiated is a nice way of saying I fucking begged him to bury his cock in me.

I would feel shameful and guilty about begging for sex — again. But the spanking seems to have expiated that sin from me. Not that it’s a sin, but it will definitely have a cost with Yuri. He’ll throw it in my face in the future when I tell him I hate him. I don’t feel guilty for getting spanked, but if I did it probably would have cured that too.

I quickly dry off, thoughts whirling in my mind. I’d never admit it to anyone, but already there’s something in me that’s eager for Yuri’s approval. I don’t know what that makes me, butI want to please him. To hear him murmur, “Good girl,” and reward me for my obedience. I don’t understand it, but it’s what I want.

If this is his game, it’s working.

I dress in jeans and a thin white T-shirt, and head downstairs.

“What do you feel like for dinner?” Yuri asks.

My stomach is growling but I say “Salad?”

Yuri gives me a sharp look. “Salad? I thought I may have worked up more of an appetite in you than salad. Eat a real meal, you’ll need the energy,” he adds with a grin.

Yup, he won’t let it go and just not talk about it, will he? All those good feelings from before, the spanking having expiated all sins and all embarrassment is completely gone. My cheeks turn red, and my tongue feels fat and Yuri doesn’t take his eyes off me, not for a moment.

“I … uhh ...”

“Did I fuck you senseless? You had no problem asking me to fuck you last night.”

“I remember what happened,” I tell him. This feels like an interrogation already. “And you regret it this morning?”

“Not until right now. I felt good and strong a few moments ago.”

“That’s good. The truth. Now try it again for what kind of food you want.”

Suddenly, I feel exhausted, too tired to fight. “Just give me a break, alright? Not everything has to be a fight.”

“I’m not doing this to pick a fight,” Yuri’s tone softens. “I want you at full strength for very selfish reasons.”

I shake my head. “I’m not hungry.”

---