Page 56 of (Un)Expected

All this time away had shown me one thing, though: I was stuck. I hid behind him because I didn’t want to face my past. For the past two years, I’d avoided all my triggers, including my family and hometown. How long had it been since I even talked to my sister? Our last phone call was quick but tense. I didn’t know if she’d ever fully forgive me for how hard I hit rock bottom, for my words and actions when I was in a bad head space.

Without realizing it, I’d cut off all meaningful relationships from my life. Well, besides Adam, but let’s be honest—he was onlystill around because he fought like hell to stay friends. No one else would go through that level of effort.

Not that I tried to let people in—that was clear with my dating track record. Ever since moving to LA, all I had were meaningless one-night stands, nothing more than a single moment shared. Letting someone in meant exposing your secrets, and mine were guarded better than Fort Knox. Even if I did open up, very few people could move past what I’d done.

Hell knows I hadn’t.

Realizing the familiar turn my thoughts were taking, I pulled my phone out, scrolling until I found the right contact.

My favorite girl.

She answered on the third ring. “Hey, kid.”

“Hey, Dani.”

“How's theleastcoast?”

I rub my hand over my face. “You gonna call it that forever?”

Dani grew up in New York, fleeing to the land of milk and honey as soon as she was old enough. From how she told it, you would think this side of the country was consistently shrouded in a cloud. It’d been decades, and Dani refused to return to this side of the country. I never asked what caused her to cut out this part of her history, as she never pried too heavily into things I wasn’t willing to share. Perhaps that was what brought us together: the mutual desire to start completely new lives, the desire to escape our demons.

“Don’t worry about that,” she said. “What’s going on with you?”

I sighed, launching into a full explanation of everything that had gone on since we arrived—how Adam had taken on a more active role in this project, the boredom, the loneliness.

Alex.

“Sounds like you’ve met someone pretty special,” Dani quietly said once I finished.

“She seems to be,” I sighed. “The thing is, she’s dating Adam, so I need to get my shit together and get her the fuck out of my head.”

Dani took a long breath, probably inhaling one of the mentholcigarettes she refused to quit, no matter how often I asked. “Is that what you want?”

No.The answer rang out before I could even give it a thought. Everything about Alex called to me, got under my skin and refused to let go. She was beautiful, but there was so much more to her than that. There was alifeinside of her that made me want to wake up, stop hiding, and rejoin the world again, to finally release myself from the chains that had been holding me back for years.

However, none of that mattered, not when my best friend’s heart was also on the line.

“It doesn’t matter what I want,” I said.

“It does if she feels the same way about you. Kid, you’re making your mind up for both of you.”

“She’s with Adam?—”

“Are they married?” Dani asked. “Engaged? Are they even exclusive?”

“Not that I know of.”

Dani muttered a curse before speaking again. “Then pull your head out of your ass andtalkto her. Even if she’s gone on a couple of dates with your friend, she doesn’t belong to anyone. She’s not a fucking pet. Adam can’t claim her unless she wants to be claimed.”

The words made sense in my mind, but the swirling of guilt in my gut told me it wasn’t that simple. Dani was one of the few people in the world who knew how Adam saved me; she understood our bond better than most. He wasn’t some passing friend. He was my brother, closer to me than my actual family. I’d rather live with regrets than hurt him.

Besides, he was everything Alex deserved. If they kept dating, he could give her the world. I had nothing to my name—no real job, not even a place to call my own. What could I possibly offer her?

As if sensing my internal battle, Dani spoke again. “None of this matters if you can’t forgive yourself, kid. You won’t be any good to anyone if you can’t love yourself first.”

I rolled my eyes, used to this speech. She gave it everytime we met up, always advocating that you needed to love yourself before you could even think about letting someone else into your life. I wanted to mention that she’d been single the whole time I’d known her, but even I wasn’t stupid enough to step on that grenade.

“Love you, Dani.”

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