Page 78 of (Un)Expected

THIRTY-FOUR

The next morning, both my head and leg ached—side effects of dealing with my bastard ex.

My eyes fluttered open, warm sunlight streaming into the sleek, white hotel room. My arm snaked out across the comforter, seeking Cole’s warmth. The sun had started to rise when he finally came to bed. I’d been up, a nightmare making it hard to fall back to sleep. As soon as his strong arm tugged me close, I was out.

I turned toward the door, straining to hear voices on the other side. Cole’s voice was there…and so was Adam’s. I cringed, hiding my head under the covers. How in the hell were we going to explain this one? Cole barging into our room in the middle of the night had to make Adam question our situation. Realistically, I knew this could mean a lot of trouble for me, but I couldn’t bring myself to care. I needed Cole, and he was there. It was that simple, and it made me fall a little bit in love with him.

Standing from the bed, I stretched out my tense muscles. If only yesterday were a dream, something I could forget when I woke. After years of deleting Nate from my mind, he’d taken forty minutes to break me down again.

The smells from the kitchen were calling my name, but I wasn’t ready to face the guys just yet. My head was too lost, too confused to try to converse normally. Even though I promised Cole I’d tell him what happened, I wasn’t ready to talk about it.

I wasn’t ready for him to see me differently.

There was no way I could pretend nothing happened. Adam bore witness to everything, and he was slowly connecting the pieces. He tried asking me about it on the ride home, but I insisted that I wasn’t feeling well, that the champagne was getting to my head. He could see through my lies, no doubt. I was hanging on to my sanity by a thin thread. Even now, I was one memory away from crumbling into a pile of frayed nerves and past heartbreak.

Eventually, I forced myself up, trotting over to the bathroom to take in my reflection. Too worn to do anything other than pass out, I slept in my make-up, and now, I looked as haggard as I felt on the inside. Dark circles surrounded my eyes, streaks of concealer caked in random spots on my cheeks.

None of that compared to the bruise marring my thigh, though. Lifting my sleep shorts, I let out a little gasp, taking in the dark purple blotches. Nate had grabbed me harder than I realized. It wasn’t the first time he’d left marks on my skin, but it was the first time he’d acted so rashly in public.

Looking at the mark made my body tense, remembering all the bruises and scars I’d covered up when we were together. On one of our first actual dates, Nate took me to get my make-up professionally done, buying me all the high-end products I could never have afforded on my own. Who knew that a couple of months later, I’d be using them to cover a black eye? My crime? I spent too long talking to a male co-worker.

The next day, a hundred pink roses appeared at my door, with a note begging me to forgive him. Foolishly, I thought it was a one-time thing. I convinced myself that his jealousy was a sign of his love, of how much he truly wanted to be with me. It was an endless cycle—his outbursts, then the subsequent grovelingfor forgiveness. Of walking on eggshells, waiting for the moment his anger lashed out, and then hating myself for loving his undivided attention afterward.

His fits became more frequent, and the loving periods got shorter and shorter. There were plenty of nights he’d wander into the apartment, reeking of alcohol and other women. I kept my mouth shut, hating that so much of my self-worth was tied to his opinion of me. Maybe, if I was perfect, he’d stop taking his anger out on me, stop seeing other women. Maybe he’d remember I was enough.

The sad thing was, I wasn’t even surprised that he got married so quickly after I left. His now-wife was a friend of his family, a woman who was always conveniently around when he needed a plus one and couldn’t risk taking me. “What would the media think if I showed up with my former intern on my arm?” He’d chuckle, dismissing me like a petulant child.

I shuddered, thinking back on the night I finally had enough. After Nate left the apartment for a “work meeting,” I forced myself to wait twenty minutes before grabbing my stashed suitcases. Taking only what I could carry, I threw everything in the back of my Jeep, praying that his date would keep him occupied.

I don’t think I breathed for the first three months I was in Saint Stephen’s Lake. I constantly looked over my shoulder, waiting for his face to pop out of the darkness. It wasn’t until his wedding announcement that I finally believed I was free.

Slowly, I started to make friends and find a new family, people who I knew would look out for me, no matter what. Friends like Calla and Javi, Marta and Curt. I found a home, one I wouldn’t give up for anything.

A short knock on the door pulled me from my thoughts. “Be right there,” I called out, pulling a longer pair of pants from my suitcase. I wasn’t ready for anyone to accidentally see what Nate had done to my leg. As I tied them tighter, I opened the door.

I wasn’t surprised to see Adam on the other side, knowing Cole would’ve come in to check on me without knocking.

“Come on in,” I said to Adam who stepped in from behind the door.

As he did, he ran his hands through his slightly matted hair. He looked like hell, almost as bad as me. I wondered if he’d gotten any sleep last night either. A heavy guilt filled me, hating that I’d pulled him into my mess. Last night was all about him being honored for his charitable endeavors, and I’d made it about me and my past.

“How are you?” Adam asked, studying my face.

I let out a short scoff. “I’m fine. Did Cole send you in here to check on me?”

“Nope,” he said. “I made him go down to the gym. The guy was about to pace a hole in the floor.” Adam smiled sadly at me. “He’s worried about you. We both are.”

“Don’t be,” I answered quickly, shifting so he couldn’t see the shame on my face. “I told you, I’m fine. I just had a minor freak-out last night. I’m–”

“Don’t you dare say fine again,” Adam said, arching his brow. I narrowed my eyes at him but didn’t finish my sentence. “Changing the subject. So, Cole and I talked last night…”

My cheeks instantly flooded with color; I wasn’t sure I was up for this conversation. “Look, before you say anything else, I know I screwed everything up–”

“Alex...” Adam sighed. “You didn’t mess up anything.” He took my hand, leading me to the end of the bed. While I sat at the foot, he shifted the vanity seat so we were facing each other. “You have no idea how grateful I am for you. Not only did you help me out when I needed it, you reminded me that there is so much more to life than my career, showed me that I want somethingrealin my life.” He tugged my hand so I looked up at him. “If you’ve found that with Cole, then I’m happy for both of you.”

“It feels real,” I whispered, gazing down at our linked hands. Terrifying. Monumental. All the things I never thought I’d open myself up to feeling again. “I care about him.”

“I’m glad to hear that,” Adam answered. “Cole…he’s been in a dark place for a long time. Don’t get me wrong, he’s come a long way, but for a while, he stopped living. Not until you came along. You’ve brought him back to life, Alex. I can’t thank you enough—for helping me with our fake relationshipandgiving me my best friend back.”