Page 34 of (Un)Expected

Instead, it hadeverythingto do with the man who made me pancakes this morning. My mind kept spinning back to last night. I hadn’t expected to feel so comfortable around Cole. Seeing his unguarded smile made my heart skip several beats. He was unlike most people I knew, who smiled freely and often. Instead, every single one of his smiles had to be earned, and fuck, I liked being the one to earn it.

If that fact alone hadn’t been enough to shake me to my core, then he had to go and almost kiss me.

When the hell had that even become an option? Every other time we’d spoken, we’d battled, trading barbs like oxygen, but after he picked me up last night, it was like something shifted. The animosity seemed to break down, leading the way to some common understanding.

However, as I started to think more about Cole, my mind inevitably drifted back to Adam. Guilt filled my core—should I tell Adam about what happened? Would it even matter? The contract wasn’t signed. It wasn’t like Adam was sitting around pining for me, but it still felt wrong. Cole said they were like brothers. The last thing I ever wanted was to get in the middle of them.

“You’re being ridiculous,” I grumbled under my breath. “Nothing even fucking happened.”

“Uh oh,” Javier said from my side. “Talking to yourself again? That’s never a good sign.” He nudged me with his shoulder. “C’mon, spill.”

I paused, unable to meet his eyes. With a huff, I quietly admitted, “I think I messed up.”

“On second thought, maybe I don’t want to know. Did you make poor drunken choices?” Javi chuckled, placing his arm around my shoulders. I leaned my head against his chest, savoring his comfort. “It couldn’t have been too bad. You seem a million times better than Calla. She looks like death warmed over.”

“Nothing like that,” I said, chewing on my lower lip. “I…I think I might have feelings for someone.”

“No shit, doll. The entire world saw that picture of you and Adam on the beach.”

I took a deep breath. “No, I don’t mean him.”

Javi turned, his eyes wide as he took in my sullen expression. With a glance around the lobby, he beckoned over one of the girls from the front desk. “Hey Marisol, could you cover for us for a couple of minutes? We have to go check on one of our VIPs.”

As she nodded, he took my hand, dragging me to the stairway. Luckily, no one used the back stairs unless there was an emergency, so we were in the clear. It was the place of many friendship-defining conversations, from my opening up about my past to debating whether Javier was going to accept his husband’s proposal. At leastthatconversation ended on a happy note.

When the door clicked closed behind us, I slunk over to the wall, letting my legs twist underneath me. Javi stood across from me, folding his arms over his chest. “Tell me everything.”

My mind raced, trying to figure out how to explain what was going on without spilling too many of Adam’s secrets. In the end, the lie I fed to Calla won out. “I talked to Adam, and he wants to take me out on a second date. He thinks there could be something between us.”

“And the problem is…”

“It feels complicated and incredibly messy,” I said. “There are too many questions, too many things that could go wrong. You know me; I don’t do well in situations like this. It feels like I’m setting myself up for failure. And then there’s Cole….”

Javi shot me a look. “Wait…Cole, as in Adam’s friend?”

I cringed. “That would be the one.”

“Okay…” he sighed, pacing the space between us. “What happened with Cole?”

“That’s the thing:nothinghappened. Calla and I ran into Cole when we were leaving Paddy’s and he drove us home because we’d been drinking. When he got back to my place, it was late, and I offered up my couch. I didn’t think anything of it, and then westayed up watching a show. We were talking, laughing…” I pushed a breath between my teeth. “There was something there, Javi. I know there was. And then this morning, I thought he was going to kiss me?—”

“Oh hell,” Javi said, running his hand over his short, cropped hair. “This is messy, even for you.”

“No shit,” I muttered. “We didn’t kiss. I promise. Which, logically, I know is a good thing. The last thing I need is another complication.”

“But?”

“But I really,reallywanted him to kiss me.”

Javi sat down next to me, taking my hand in his lap. As he rubbed soothing circles against the back of it, even more words came tumbling out of my mouth.

“Now, I have no idea what I’m supposed to do. I promised Adam I’d think about his offer, and there’s a big part of me that wants to take him up on it. He’s such a good guy, and I like spending time with him. Then again, Cole makes me feel…” I sighed, dropping my gaze down to our joined hands. “Like heseesme.”

I glanced up at Javi to find his eyes were a bit glassy as he gave me a knowing smile. For years, I’d been hiding, shrinking myself to fit everyone else’s mold. Besides my close friends, it felt like so long since someone had actually seen the woman I was trying to hide, too scared to let someone in, but Cole had done it effortlessly, and that scared the shit out of me. I shook my head, pulling myself out of the moment. “Maybe it’s all in my head. I don’t know anymore.” I looked up at him. “So tell me what to do.”

“That’s not up to me, Alex,” Javi answered. “I can’t tell you what to do next. However, before you make any decisions, I think you should talk to Cole.”

I groaned, dropping my forehead on his shoulder. “What if he thinks I’m crazy and he was only being nice yesterday?”

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